1
00:00:01,168 --> 00:00:04,045
(fireworks popping)

2
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX

3
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

4
00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:13,472
- LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA,
Y'ALL READY FOR THIS BITCH?

5
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,724
[cheers and applause]

6
00:00:15,766 --> 00:00:21,062
Y'ALL GIVE IT UP
FOR MR. KATT WILLIAMS!

7
00:00:24,191 --> 00:00:26,777
[heartbeat]

8
00:00:26,819 --> 00:00:29,738
- AS FAR RETIREMENTS GO,

9
00:00:29,780 --> 00:00:35,202
THIS ONE HAS CLEARLY HIT
ROCK BOTTOM.

10
00:00:35,243 --> 00:00:40,207
BUT NOW,
WHAT A WONDERFUL PLACE TO BE.

11
00:00:40,248 --> 00:00:43,502
AND LOOK AT
ALL OF THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE.

12
00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:46,171
QUESTION IS,
WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND

13
00:00:46,213 --> 00:00:49,591
CAN COME FROM THREE YEARS
LIVING UNDER A ROCK

14
00:00:49,633 --> 00:00:54,137
AND THEN
COME BACK INTO THIS?

15
00:00:54,179 --> 00:00:57,432
WHY, YOU NEED MORE
THAN YOUR HAIR DONE UP

16
00:00:57,474 --> 00:01:02,187
IN THE MAYOR
OF WHOVILLE STYLE AND A CAPE.

17
00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:07,317
LUCKILY FOR ME, I ALWAYS
HAVE A SECRET WEAPON.

18
00:01:07,359 --> 00:01:09,069
[heartbeat]

19
00:01:09,110 --> 00:01:12,197
[MC Hammer by Rick Ross]

20
00:01:12,239 --> 00:01:20,247
♪ ♪

21
00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:26,461
- BOSS.

22
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:30,424
RICKY ROSS.

23
00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:32,467
IT'S TRIPLE "C".

24
00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,386
COLOR, CUT, CLARITY.

25
00:01:34,428 --> 00:01:36,555
♪ MY GUN DIRTY ♪

26
00:01:36,597 --> 00:01:37,639
♪ MY BRICK CLEAN ♪

27
00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:38,807
♪ I'M RIDING DIRTY ♪

28
00:01:38,849 --> 00:01:41,769
- LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
OF LOS ANGELES,

29
00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:44,563
WELCOME TO 2012,
GODDAMN IT!

30
00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:47,524
LOOK AROUND.
SHIT!

31
00:01:47,566 --> 00:01:49,109
WHOO!

32
00:01:49,150 --> 00:01:50,652
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

33
00:01:50,694 --> 00:01:55,741
2012 IS UPON US, AND BITCH
NIGGAS AIN'T HAPPY ABOUT IT.

34
00:01:55,783 --> 00:01:57,409
I GOTTA TELL YOU WHY.

35
00:01:57,451 --> 00:02:00,412
FIRST OF ALL, HOW MANY PEOPLE
IS HAPPY THAT BARACK OBAMA

36
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:03,624
IS THE PRESIDENT OF THESE
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA?

37
00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:07,168
[cheers and applause]

38
00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:11,590
NOW, I UNDERSTAND HOW
THAT COULD BE A DIVISIVE ISSUE.

39
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:14,509
BUT AMERICA AIN'T ABOUT
DIVISION, GODDAMN IT.

40
00:02:14,551 --> 00:02:16,219
IT'S ABOUT UNITY.

41
00:02:16,261 --> 00:02:19,389
AND NEVER HAVE WHITE PEOPLE
AND BLACK PEOPLE

42
00:02:19,431 --> 00:02:22,350
BEEN SO UNITED
AND DISGUSTED

43
00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:27,355
AT THE SAME GODDAMN TIME
AS WE ARE RIGHT NOW.

44
00:02:27,397 --> 00:02:31,693
WHITE PEOPLE, LET ME SAY THIS
IN FRONT OF NIGGAS.

45
00:02:31,735 --> 00:02:34,822
WE HAVE HAD A BLACK PRESIDENT
FOR QUITE SOME TIME RIGHT NOW,

46
00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:38,283
AND WE HAVE NOT HAD
AN OPPORTUNITY AS NIGGAS

47
00:02:38,325 --> 00:02:40,119
TO THANK YOU,
WHITE PEOPLE,

48
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,747
FOR THE FACT THAT YOU HAVE
LET OUR COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF,

49
00:02:43,789 --> 00:02:47,126
A NIGGA,
RUN THIS GODDAMN COUNTRY.

50
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,543
WE APPRECIATE THAT.

51
00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:50,211
YOU DIDN'T KILL HIM.

52
00:02:50,253 --> 00:02:52,297
YOU LET THE NIGGA
SHOW UP TO WORK.

53
00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:55,258
WE THANK YOU VERY MUCH,
WHITE PEOPLE.

54
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:57,552
UNDERSTAND THAT
FROM NIGGAS.

55
00:02:57,594 --> 00:02:58,929
[cheers and applause]

56
00:02:58,971 --> 00:03:02,474
NOW, WHAT YOU NEED TO
UNDERSTAND, WHITE PEOPLE,

57
00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,893
IS WE HAVE BEEN CONFUSED

58
00:03:04,935 --> 00:03:08,438
EVER SINCE THE NIGGA
GOT ELECTED.

59
00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:11,399
WE DON'T KNOW
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON.

60
00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:13,568
WE WORKING ON FAITH,
WHITE PEOPLE.

61
00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:14,569
UNDERSTAND...

62
00:03:14,611 --> 00:03:16,321
- THAT'S RIGHT.

63
00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:18,406
- WHEN A NIGGA
TAKES THE OFFICE,

64
00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:22,703
AS NIGGAS,
WE HAVE A MEETING.

65
00:03:22,744 --> 00:03:25,956
WHITE PEOPLE--"WHAT?"

66
00:03:28,750 --> 00:03:30,752
AS NIGGAS,
WE HAVE A MEETING.

67
00:03:30,794 --> 00:03:33,505
WE DECIDED WE WAS
GONNA SUPPORT HIM.

68
00:03:33,547 --> 00:03:36,175
NOW, AS A NIGGA,

69
00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:39,678
IT IS HARD
FOR US TO NOT TALK SHIT

70
00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:42,764
ABOUT WHAT A MOTHERFUCKER'S
DOING ON HIS GODDAMN JOB.

71
00:03:42,806 --> 00:03:45,392
THAT'S KIND OF OUR SHIT
IS TO TALK SHIT

72
00:03:45,433 --> 00:03:47,519
ABOUT WHAT THE FUCK
YOU SHOULD BE DOING.

73
00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:52,524
NOW, NIGGAS SOMEHOW
SWALLOWED ALL THAT.

74
00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:56,695
AND NIGGAS SUPPORTED OBAMA
EVERY STEP OF THE GODDAMN WAY.

75
00:03:56,737 --> 00:03:58,238
AND IN THE BEGINNING,

76
00:03:58,279 --> 00:04:00,657
WE WAS TALKING
WITH BASS IN OUR VOICE,

77
00:04:00,699 --> 00:04:03,493
AND USING GESTURES,
AND STOMPING OUR FEET AND SHIT.

78
00:04:03,535 --> 00:04:06,246
LOOK, HOW LONG
DID IT TAKE YOU MOTHERFUCKERS

79
00:04:06,287 --> 00:04:08,916
TO RUN THIS COUNTRY
IN THE GODDAMN GROUND?

80
00:04:08,957 --> 00:04:11,919
NOW, YOU WANT THIS NIGGA
TO DO MAGIC?

81
00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,379
THAT WAS US EIGHT MONTHS
AFTER THE ELECTION.

82
00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:15,923
THAT WAS US.

83
00:04:15,964 --> 00:04:19,676
FOUR MONTHS AFTER THAT, WE HAD
LOST ALL THE BASS OUR VOICE.

84
00:04:19,718 --> 00:04:22,221
WE JUST--"LOOK, WE DON'T KNOW
WHAT THIS NIGGA IS DOING,

85
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:24,264
"BUT HE'S TRYING, OKAY?

86
00:04:24,305 --> 00:04:25,807
"YOU GOT TO GIVE
THIS NIGGA A CHANCE.

87
00:04:25,849 --> 00:04:28,393
"WE DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK
HE WORKING WITH RIGHT NOW.

88
00:04:28,435 --> 00:04:31,772
HE--"

89
00:04:31,813 --> 00:04:34,566
WHITE PEOPLE, LET ME JUST
TELL YOU, ON BEHALF OF NIGGAS,

90
00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:39,571
NOBODY WATCHES A PRESIDENTIAL
SPEECH HARDER THAN NIGGAS.

91
00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:43,575
WE BE WAITING ON THIS NIGGA
TO SAY ANYTHING

92
00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:46,411
THAT HAVE SOMETHING
TO DO WITH US.

93
00:04:46,453 --> 00:04:47,621
WE J--

94
00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:52,626
[laughter]

95
00:04:56,546 --> 00:04:59,633
WHITE PEOPLE,
I'VE BEEN SO PROUD OF Y'ALL.

96
00:04:59,674 --> 00:05:02,261
Y'ALL HAVE BECOME NIGGAS
IN THIS RECESSION

97
00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:05,013
THE WAY I KNEW YOU COULD.

98
00:05:05,055 --> 00:05:06,681
OH, LOOK AT WHITE PEOPLE--

99
00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:09,309
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN
'BECAME NIGGAS'?" OH, YES.

100
00:05:09,350 --> 00:05:12,437
OH, WE ALL NIGGAS NOW.
YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT?

101
00:05:12,479 --> 00:05:14,648
YOU DIDN'T HEAR
ABOUT THE 99%?

102
00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:16,608
THAT'S NIGGAS.

103
00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:20,445
MM-HMM.
MM-HMM.

104
00:05:23,573 --> 00:05:28,369
NOT GONNA BE ABOUT RACE
NO MORE IN 2012.

105
00:05:28,411 --> 00:05:30,622
MM-MM.
IT'S BIGGER THAN THAT.

106
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:34,459
AIN'T ABOUT WHITE AND BLACK.
NO, NO, AIN'T ABOUT THAT.

107
00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:37,796
IT'S ABOUT YOU VERSUS THEM.

108
00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:40,799
THEM VERSUS US.

109
00:05:40,841 --> 00:05:44,552
WE VERSUS THEM.

110
00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:47,889
AND FUCK THEY MOTHERFUCKING
ASSES BEFORE WE BEGIN.

111
00:05:47,931 --> 00:05:48,974
NOW,

112
00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:51,059
UNDERSTAND THIS,
WHITE PEOPLE,

113
00:05:51,101 --> 00:05:54,353
YOU CANNOT
CONFUSE THE FACTS.

114
00:05:54,395 --> 00:05:57,316
YOU ONLY VOTED FOR THIS NIGGA
BECAUSE HE WAS

115
00:05:57,356 --> 00:06:00,652
KIND OF A NIGGA.

116
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:04,489
HE WASN'T NO
FULL-FLEDGED NIGGA.

117
00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:08,035
YOU WASN'T GONNA
PUT NO WHOLE NIGGA

118
00:06:08,076 --> 00:06:10,453
IN THE GODDAMN
WHITE HOUSE.

119
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:13,498
AND NOW YOU WANNA
BLAME THIS NIGGA

120
00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:16,584
FOR NOT DOING
NIGGARDLY SHIT?

121
00:06:16,626 --> 00:06:20,463
"HE NEVER GETS ANGRY.
HE NEVER RAISES HIS VOICE.

122
00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:24,885
HE'S JUST NOT STRONG ENOUGH.
HE WON'T--"

123
00:06:24,926 --> 00:06:27,386
YOU WANT HIM
TO BE A NIGGA?

124
00:06:27,428 --> 00:06:30,349
I DON'T THINK YOU WANT HIM
TO BE A NIGGA. I DON'T--

125
00:06:30,389 --> 00:06:31,808
I DON'T THINK YOU READY
TO SEE MICHELLE OBAMA

126
00:06:31,850 --> 00:06:33,894
COME TO THE NEWS CONFERENCE
IN FLIP-FLOPS.

127
00:06:33,935 --> 00:06:35,062
I DON'T THINK YOU'RE READY.

128
00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:40,441
[laughter]

129
00:06:48,992 --> 00:06:50,785
WHITE PEOPLE,
YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND,

130
00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:52,620
WE ALL IN THIS
TOGETHER.

131
00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:55,790
AS BLACK PEOPLE, WE DIDN'T KNOW
WHAT THE FUCK WAS GON' HAPPEN.

132
00:06:55,832 --> 00:06:59,794
ALL WE KNEW WAS IT WAS TIME
FOR SOME SHIT TO HAPPEN.

133
00:06:59,836 --> 00:07:01,046
THAT'S ALL WE KNEW.

134
00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:02,756
YOU HAVE TO FORGIVE US
IN THE FACT

135
00:07:02,797 --> 00:07:06,385
THAT WE VOTED FOR A NIGGA
TO BE A SUPERHERO

136
00:07:06,425 --> 00:07:10,722
AND FORGOT TO ASK THE NIGGA,
"COULD HE FLY?"

137
00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:14,434
[laughter]

138
00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:20,190
WHITE PEOPLE, YOU NEED TO
UNDERSTAND HOW READY NIGGAS WAS

139
00:07:20,232 --> 00:07:21,733
THE DAY AFTER THE ELECTION.

140
00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:23,484
YOU'LL NEVER UNDERSTAND.

141
00:07:23,526 --> 00:07:26,029
WE WAS READY FOR ANYTHING.

142
00:07:26,071 --> 00:07:28,656
THAT NIGGA COULD HAVE
SAID ANYTHING.

143
00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:31,910
WE WAS AT THE HOUSE
IN DOUBLE DUTCH MODE, JUST...

144
00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:35,080
[laughter]

145
00:07:38,166 --> 00:07:42,587
THAT NIGGA COULD HAVE
SAID ANYTHING.

146
00:07:42,629 --> 00:07:45,006
BARACK OBAMA COULD HAVE CAME OUT
THE NEXT DAY AFTER THE ELECTION

147
00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:46,716
AND SAID,
"I WANT ALL NIGGAS

148
00:07:46,758 --> 00:07:50,887
TO GO OUTSIDE
AND CLEAN UP TRASH,"

149
00:07:50,929 --> 00:07:53,932
AND IT'D HAVE BEEN GANGBANGERS
ALL OVER INGLEWOOD JUST...

150
00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:58,061
[laughter]

151
00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:00,563
I DON'T THINK YOU WANNA

152
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:02,565
DROP THAT RIGHT THERE
TODAY, MY NIGGA.

153
00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:06,069
YOU UNDERSTAND
WHAT I'M SAYING?

154
00:08:06,111 --> 00:08:09,614
[laughter]

155
00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:12,159
NOW, WE DON'T KNOW
WHAT THE FUCK GOING ON.

156
00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:15,078
WE JUST WAITING ON OBAMA
TO GIVE US OUR WORD.

157
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,913
WE'VE BEEN
WAITING SO LONG,

158
00:08:16,955 --> 00:08:19,458
THAT NIGGA COULD GIVE US
ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.

159
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:20,625
THAT NIGGA
COULD GIVE NIGGAS

160
00:08:20,667 --> 00:08:23,711
FREE SMALL FRIES
EVERY 14th THURSDAY,

161
00:08:23,753 --> 00:08:27,632
AND THAT WOULD BE
GOOD ENOUGH.

162
00:08:27,674 --> 00:08:31,594
BUT, WHITE PEOPLE,
WHAT WE AIN'T GONNA LET YOU DO

163
00:08:31,636 --> 00:08:34,764
IS TALK ABOUT THIS NIGGA
LIKE HE AIN'T A CHILD OF GOD.

164
00:08:34,806 --> 00:08:37,558
THIS NIGGA BEEN OUT THERE
DOING HIS GODDAMN JOB.

165
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:38,935
I'LL TELL YOU ONE THING,

166
00:08:38,977 --> 00:08:41,729
I DO SEEM TO REMEMBER
THAT FOR EIGHT YEARS,

167
00:08:41,771 --> 00:08:45,484
WE COULDN'T FIND
THE SAME ONE GODDAMN TERRORIST

168
00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:46,985
WE WAS LOOKING FOR.

169
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:50,738
I SAID, "ONE GODDAMN TERRORIST
THAT WE WAS LOOKING FOR."

170
00:08:50,780 --> 00:08:55,994
I SAID, "ONE GODDAMN TERRORIST
THAT WE WAS LOOKING FOR."

171
00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:58,163
AND MY GODDAMN PRESIDENT

172
00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:00,915
DONE KILLED EVERY
GODDAMN TERRORIST

173
00:09:00,957 --> 00:09:03,293
THAT EVER GODDAMN LIVED.

174
00:09:03,335 --> 00:09:04,961
YOU CAN SAY WHAT YOU WANT.

175
00:09:05,003 --> 00:09:09,716
[cheers and applause]

176
00:09:09,757 --> 00:09:13,887
I'M NOT SAYING IF YOU
PUT A NIGGA IN THE WHITE HOUSE,

177
00:09:13,928 --> 00:09:17,015
HE WON'T FUCK UP
THE CREDIT OF THE COUNTRY.

178
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:20,143
[laughter]

179
00:09:20,185 --> 00:09:23,104
BUT IF YOU WANT
SOME TERRORISTS,

180
00:09:23,146 --> 00:09:25,273
YOU GET YOURSELF A NIGGA.

181
00:09:25,315 --> 00:09:28,235
BARACK OBAMA
DIDN'T HAVE TO SEND IN

182
00:09:28,276 --> 00:09:32,572
THE ARMY, AND THE NAVY,
AND THE COAST GUARD.

183
00:09:32,613 --> 00:09:35,909
BARACK OBAMA SENT
THREE MOTHERFUCKERS IN.

184
00:09:35,950 --> 00:09:37,869
KILLED EVERY TERRORIST.

185
00:09:37,911 --> 00:09:40,705
JUST ONE TO SHOOT 'EM,
AND TWO TO POSE.

186
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:42,999
JUST...BAP, BAP!

187
00:09:43,041 --> 00:09:47,962
♪ THE LAND OF THE FREE ♪

188
00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:51,841
[cheers and applause]

189
00:09:51,883 --> 00:09:55,262
WE DON'T GIVE A FUCK
ABOUT NONE OF THAT BULLSHIT.

190
00:09:55,303 --> 00:09:58,014
I THOUGHT
PRESIDENT BUSH SAID

191
00:09:58,056 --> 00:10:03,019
THAT OSAMA BIN LADEN
WAS THE AXIS OF EVIL.

192
00:10:03,061 --> 00:10:08,149
I THOUGHT HE SAID
HE WAS BEELZEBUB HIMSELF.

193
00:10:08,191 --> 00:10:10,110
FOR MY SPANISH FRIENDS,

194
00:10:10,151 --> 00:10:13,905
"SATAN, EL DIABLO."

195
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:16,783
[laughter]

196
00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:18,618
NOT MY MOTHERFUCKING
PRESIDENT.

197
00:10:18,659 --> 00:10:20,745
MY PRESIDENT FOUND THAT
MOTHERFUCKER IN AN UNFURNISHED,

198
00:10:20,787 --> 00:10:23,831
ONE-BEDROOM APARTMENT
WITH TWO GODDAMN MATTRESSES,

199
00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:27,919
NO BACKBOARD, ONE BITCH,
NO PHONE, NO GUN,

200
00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:30,755
THREE LAPTOPS,
AND A SMART PHONE.

201
00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:33,174
THERE'S SOME DRUG DEALERS
IN HERE TONIGHT,

202
00:10:33,216 --> 00:10:36,928
GOT THAT IN AN ESCALADE.

203
00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:38,930
NO.

204
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:41,308
NO, YOU DON'T WANNA
FUCK WITH AMERICA, BABY.

205
00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:46,062
UH-UH,
ALL THE TERRORISTS GONE.

206
00:10:46,104 --> 00:10:48,773
WHAT OF FUCKING
SADDAM HUSSEIN?

207
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:53,069
OH, HE WAS A DICTATOR
FOR 40 YEARS.

208
00:10:53,111 --> 00:10:57,073
THEY PULLED THAT MOTHERFUCKER
OUT OF A EIGHT-FOOT HOLE

209
00:10:57,115 --> 00:10:58,325
WITH A TWINKIE,
A DING-DONG,

210
00:10:58,366 --> 00:11:01,620
AND A KING JAMES VERSION
OF A COPY OF THE BIBLE.

211
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,913
THAT NIGGA
CAME OUT THE HOLE

212
00:11:03,955 --> 00:11:07,792
LOOKING LIKE ME
WITH NO PERM IN A MUG SHOT.

213
00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:12,713
[laughter]

214
00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:23,724
YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT.

215
00:11:23,766 --> 00:11:25,101
DUDE SAID, "YOU'RE UGLY."

216
00:11:25,143 --> 00:11:28,438
YEAH, YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO THINK THAT, FAG.

217
00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:33,443
I DON'T DO THIS SHIT
FOR WHAT MEN THINK.

218
00:11:33,485 --> 00:11:36,695
WE'RE ALL MEN.
WE ALL THINK LIKE MEN.

219
00:11:36,737 --> 00:11:39,658
BUT I'LL TELL YOU
ONE THING--

220
00:11:39,698 --> 00:11:42,160
IF YOU WANNA KNOW SOMETHING
THAT'LL SUSTAIN YOU,

221
00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:43,953
LET ME SHOW
YOU A LITTLE SECRET

222
00:11:43,995 --> 00:11:46,414
AS TO WHAT GIVES ME
THE STRENGTH TO SAY

223
00:11:46,456 --> 00:11:49,125
"FUCK SATAN" RIGHT IN HIS
MOTHERFUCKING FACE.

224
00:11:49,167 --> 00:11:53,087
LADIES, WOULD YOU MAKE SOME
MOTHERFUCKING NOISE ONE TIME?

225
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:55,131
[women cheering]

226
00:11:55,173 --> 00:11:57,258
WHOO!

227
00:11:57,300 --> 00:11:58,843
WELL...

228
00:11:58,885 --> 00:12:03,848
WELL, SWEET BABY JESUS,
HOO, HOO, HOO.

229
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:06,893
YES, FELLAS.
IT'S 2012.

230
00:12:06,934 --> 00:12:10,813
IF YOU GOT YOU A GIRL,
TIME TO STOP FUCKING AROUND.

231
00:12:10,855 --> 00:12:13,692
IT'S 2012, IT'S THE GODDAMN
FOURTH QUARTER.

232
00:12:13,732 --> 00:12:16,277
WHATEVER DECISION
YOU FUCKING MADE,

233
00:12:16,319 --> 00:12:18,697
IT'S DONE NOW.

234
00:12:18,737 --> 00:12:22,283
NOW, LADIES,
THAT DON'T APPLY TO Y'ALL.

235
00:12:22,325 --> 00:12:23,868
I UNDERSTAND SOME OF Y'ALL

236
00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:27,288
MIGHT BE IN HERE
WITH A STEPPIN' STONE NIGGA.

237
00:12:27,330 --> 00:12:31,084
YOU KNOW, SOMEBODY TO GET YOU
THROUGH TILL YOU SEE YOURSELF.

238
00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:37,173
NOTHIN' WRONG WITH THAT.

239
00:12:37,215 --> 00:12:40,427
BUT 2012 HAS COME, AND THEY GOT
SOME SURPRISES FOR US,

240
00:12:40,468 --> 00:12:41,886
AND YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO

241
00:12:41,928 --> 00:12:44,347
MAKE SURE YOU GOT
SOMETHING IN YOUR LIFE

242
00:12:44,389 --> 00:12:46,765
THAT BELONG YOU--

243
00:12:46,807 --> 00:12:48,767
SOME SHIT
THAT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU.

244
00:12:48,809 --> 00:12:51,730
WHAT I'M SAYING FELLAS,

245
00:12:51,770 --> 00:12:54,941
IF YOU GOT A WOMAN
THAT'S SPECIAL IN YOUR LIFE,

246
00:12:54,982 --> 00:12:58,111
PUT THE GAMES ON HOLD
FOR A SECOND,

247
00:12:58,152 --> 00:13:01,780
AND FUCK THIS BITCH LIKE YOU
NEED HER IN YOUR GODDAMN LIFE.

248
00:13:01,822 --> 00:13:05,784
JUST FUCK HER LIKE YOU NEED HER
IN YOUR GODDAMN LIFE,

249
00:13:05,826 --> 00:13:07,912
IN CASE THE WORLD
COME TO AN END ON 2012.

250
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:10,457
NOW, LADIES...

251
00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:13,251
LADIES, WE NEED Y'ALL

252
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:17,213
COME ON BACK HOME.

253
00:13:17,255 --> 00:13:21,884
I UNDERSTAND SOME OF YOU LADIES
DONE GOT BESIDE YOURSELF.

254
00:13:21,926 --> 00:13:23,219
WE DIDN'T SAY SHIT.

255
00:13:23,261 --> 00:13:25,096
WE SAW IT HAPPENING,
WE DIDN'T SAY SHIT.

256
00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:28,099
WE SAW Y'ALL GOING OFF
TO THE LITTLE FREAKY NASTY,

257
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:31,561
LITTLE DIRTY, LITTLE SNEAKY
FREAKY, LITTLE NASTY STORE.

258
00:13:31,603 --> 00:13:34,439
AND WE SAW YOU
PURCHASING YOURSELF ITEMS

259
00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:37,233
FOR 24, 29, 39.95,

260
00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:40,819
AND WE KNOW YOU GOT YOURSELF
A RABBIT AND A BULLET,

261
00:13:40,861 --> 00:13:43,030
AND A BULLET
WITH A RABBIT.

262
00:13:43,072 --> 00:13:45,450
NOW, THERE AIN'T NOTHING
WRONG WITH IT, LADIES,

263
00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:48,328
BUT TIME TO BRING YOUR
ASS BACK HOME FOR 2012.

264
00:13:48,369 --> 00:13:51,289
SOME OF Y'ALL DONE
FUCKED YOUR WHOLE CLITORIS UP,

265
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:52,915
FUCKING AROUND.

266
00:13:52,957 --> 00:13:56,127
LOOK AT THE LADIES.
"WHAT?"

267
00:13:56,169 --> 00:14:00,465
SOME OF YOU LADIES HAVE FUCKED
YOUR ENTIRE VAGINA UP

268
00:14:00,507 --> 00:14:03,510
BEING GREEDY.

269
00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:05,094
JUST BECAUSE
YOU HAVE SOMETHING

270
00:14:05,136 --> 00:14:07,888
THAT CAN HIT YOUR SPOT
EVERY TIME, BITCH,

271
00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:10,809
DOES NOT MEAN YOU
GOT TO HIT THAT MOTHERFUCKER

272
00:14:10,849 --> 00:14:15,396
136 TIMES ON TARGET,
JUST--

273
00:14:15,438 --> 00:14:19,567
[imitates buzzing]

274
00:14:21,194 --> 00:14:25,906
FUCKED YOUR WHOLE
GODDAMN CLITORIS UP.

275
00:14:25,948 --> 00:14:29,076
US FELLAS, WE REMEMBER YOUR
CLITORIS THE WAY IT USED TO BE.

276
00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:31,538
WE REMEMBER WHEN
THAT MOTHERFUCKER WAS SO SHY

277
00:14:31,579 --> 00:14:33,956
IT WOULDN'T EVEN
COME OUT THE HOOD.

278
00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:37,001
YOU HAD TO GET DOWN THERE
AND TALK SWEET TO IT AND SHIT.

279
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:38,336
"YOU JUST COME ON
OUT OF THERE.

280
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:40,421
I SEE YOU IN THERE."

281
00:14:40,463 --> 00:14:45,009
[laughter]

282
00:14:45,051 --> 00:14:47,595
NOW YOU DONE HIT THAT
MOTHERFUCKER SO MANY TIMES,

283
00:14:47,637 --> 00:14:50,056
THAT BITCH IS ALL
OUTSIDE OF YOUR CLITORIS,

284
00:14:50,097 --> 00:14:52,183
JUST OUTSIDE
OF THE CAMEL TOE,

285
00:14:52,225 --> 00:14:56,103
PUSHING THE LABIA BACK.

286
00:14:56,145 --> 00:14:58,439
"BITCH, YOUR CLITORIS
IS SCARING MY PENIS.

287
00:14:58,481 --> 00:15:03,236
YOU CAN'T EVEN--"

288
00:15:03,277 --> 00:15:07,281
[laughter]

289
00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:11,202
MY ONLY POINT IS IT'S TIME
TO GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER.

290
00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:15,498
IT DON'T MATTER IF WHAT YOU GOT
IN YOUR LIFE IS FUCKED UP.

291
00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:19,627
THAT'S WHAT THE FUCK
YOU GOT.

292
00:15:21,337 --> 00:15:22,963
2012 COMING,

293
00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:25,383
AND THEY NOT GOING TO TELL US
THE SHIT WE NEED TO KNOW.

294
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:27,927
THAT'S WHY WE ALL
GOT TO WORK TOGETHER.

295
00:15:27,968 --> 00:15:30,221
WHITE PEOPLE,
WE NEED Y'ALL TO REMEMBER

296
00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:32,390
THAT Y'ALL
WERE HERE WITH US.

297
00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:37,311
YOU LOVE MEXICANS AND NIGGAS,
AND DON'T ACT LIKE YOU DON'T.

298
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:41,023
LOOK AT THEM ON THE SPOT.

299
00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:44,611
[laughter]

300
00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:48,364
I CERTAINLY DO.

301
00:15:48,406 --> 00:15:50,241
WHITE PEOPLE,
THIS IS GONNA BE IMPORTANT.

302
00:15:50,283 --> 00:15:51,951
2012 IS COMING.

303
00:15:51,992 --> 00:15:53,953
THEY SAY IT IS GONNA BE
THE END OF THE WORLD,

304
00:15:53,994 --> 00:15:56,623
AND, WHITE PEOPLE,
WE KNOW HOW Y'ALL DO

305
00:15:56,664 --> 00:16:01,043
WHEN Y'ALL GET SOME GODDAMN
INFORMATION DON'T NOBODY KNOW.

306
00:16:01,085 --> 00:16:02,336
WHITE PEOPLE
DON'T NEVER LEAVE.

307
00:16:02,378 --> 00:16:03,337
THEY JUST DISAPPEAR.

308
00:16:03,379 --> 00:16:05,465
JUST--

309
00:16:05,506 --> 00:16:10,010
[laughter]

310
00:16:12,639 --> 00:16:15,057
NIGGAS, WE GOTTA BE
CAREFUL IN 2012.

311
00:16:15,099 --> 00:16:17,184
THEY TRYING
TO FUCK US OVER.

312
00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:20,146
AS BLACK PEOPLE,
WE NEVER LEAVE ON TIME.

313
00:16:20,187 --> 00:16:22,690
BROKE PEOPLE,
WE NEVER LEAVE.

314
00:16:22,732 --> 00:16:26,110
AS BROKE FOLKS,
WE ALWAYS GOT TOO MUCH SHIT,

315
00:16:26,152 --> 00:16:28,279
TOO MANY ENDS
TO PUT TOGETHER.

316
00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:30,406
NOT RICH PEOPLE.

317
00:16:30,448 --> 00:16:32,116
RICH PEOPLE GET THEY SHIT,

318
00:16:32,158 --> 00:16:36,287
FIND OUT SOMETHING IS FUCKED UP,
AND THEY LEAVE.

319
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,080
AND I SPEAK FOR NIGGAS.

320
00:16:38,122 --> 00:16:42,669
AND NIGGAS AIN'T GOT NOWHERE
TO GODDAMN GO, WHITE PEOPLE.

321
00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:45,964
IF THE TERRORISTS STRIKE,

322
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:51,135
EVERYBODY FROM IRELAND
CAN GO RIGHT BACK TO IRELAND.

323
00:16:55,723 --> 00:16:59,769
EVERYBODY FROM ENGLAND
GO RIGHT BACK.

324
00:16:59,811 --> 00:17:04,398
DRAKE AND 100 CANADIANS,
ALL THE WAY.

325
00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:08,402
♪ MAYBE SHE WILL ♪

326
00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:09,529
WHAT ABOUT NIGGAS?

327
00:17:09,570 --> 00:17:12,156
WE GOTTA GO TO OUR
GRANDMAMMA HOUSE

328
00:17:12,198 --> 00:17:17,161
AND FIGURE OUT HOW MANY MINIVANS
WE EVEN GOT IN THE FAMILY.

329
00:17:17,203 --> 00:17:20,247
IT'S COMING DOWN.
2012.

330
00:17:20,289 --> 00:17:22,583
WHITE PEOPLE,
WE GONNA NEED YOU TO TELL US

331
00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:24,335
WHAT THE FUCK IS
GOING ON.

332
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:28,798
THEY AIN'T GONNA
TELL US ON B.E.T.

333
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:30,299
ABOUT THE END
OF THE GODDAMN WORLD.

334
00:17:30,341 --> 00:17:31,676
JUST UNDERSTAND
WHAT I'M SAYING.

335
00:17:31,718 --> 00:17:34,053
THE VIDEOS STILL
GONNA PLAYING.

336
00:17:34,094 --> 00:17:37,348
THEY NOT EVEN GONNA
PUT SHIT DOWN AT THE BOTTOM.

337
00:17:37,390 --> 00:17:39,684
"NIGGAS, LOOK OUTSIDE.
THE WORLD IS ENDING."

338
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:41,644
NOTHING.

339
00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:46,774
[laughter]

340
00:17:48,651 --> 00:17:50,236
EVERY TIME I SEE
MY PRESIDENT,

341
00:17:50,277 --> 00:17:52,739
IT LOOK TO ME LIKE THEY DONE
TOLD THAT NIGGA SOME SHIT

342
00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:56,367
HE CAN'T FUCKING TELL US.

343
00:17:56,409 --> 00:18:01,539
EVERY TIME YOU SEE OBAMA,
HE LOOKING LIKE THIS.

344
00:18:01,581 --> 00:18:06,085
[laughter]

345
00:18:10,673 --> 00:18:12,383
UNDERSTAND.

346
00:18:12,425 --> 00:18:15,094
WE ALREADY KILLED
ALL THE TERRORISTS.

347
00:18:15,135 --> 00:18:17,096
AIN'T NO FUCKING MORE.

348
00:18:17,137 --> 00:18:20,391
THEY BEAT THE SHIT
OUT OF MUAMMAR GADDAFI'S ASS.

349
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:25,229
PLEASE TELL ME YOU SAW WHAT
HAPPENED TO MUAMMAR GADDAFI.

350
00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:28,775
THAT MOTHERFUCKER WAS
THE PRESIDENT OF HIS COUNTRY,

351
00:18:28,816 --> 00:18:31,652
AND, THANKS TO FACEBOOK...

352
00:18:31,694 --> 00:18:34,781
[laughter]

353
00:18:34,822 --> 00:18:36,741
THEY GAVE THIS...

354
00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:38,284
THEY GAVE
THIS MOTHERFUCKER A BEATING

355
00:18:38,325 --> 00:18:41,245
NIGGAS WASN'T EVEN
FAMILIAR WITH.

356
00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:44,624
IT'S HARD TO IMPRESS NIGGAS
WITH GETTING YOUR ASS WHOOPED.

357
00:18:44,665 --> 00:18:48,419
AS NIGGAS, WE'VE SEEN IT DONE
ALL KINDS OF WAYS.

358
00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:51,589
NEVER IN THE HISTORY
OF NIGGADOM

359
00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:55,259
HAVE WE EVER SEEN A MOTHERFUCKER
GET HIS ASS WHOOPED

360
00:18:55,301 --> 00:19:00,264
ALL THE WAY
TO AN EXECUTION.

361
00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:03,267
YOU BEAT THIS NIGGAS ASS
TO KILL HIM?

362
00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:07,855
YOU COULD'VE JUST KILLED HIM.
Y'ALL SORRY SONS OF BITCHES.

363
00:19:07,897 --> 00:19:09,607
AND CNN AIN'T SHIT.

364
00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:13,444
CNN SAID THEY WASN'T GONNA SHOW
IT WHILE THEY WERE SHOWING IT

365
00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:16,196
IN SLOW MOTION,

366
00:19:16,238 --> 00:19:18,574
AND PUT SUBTITLES
UNDER THIS BITCH

367
00:19:18,616 --> 00:19:22,411
SO YOU CAN UNDERSTAND
WHAT HE WAS SAYING CLEARLY.

368
00:19:22,453 --> 00:19:23,412
[whoops indistinctly]

369
00:19:23,454 --> 00:19:28,126
"STOP IT.
YOU'RE KILLING ME.

370
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:33,131
I AM THE PRESIDENT."

371
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:34,590
THEY BEAT THAT NIGGA
LIKE CONRAD MURRAY

372
00:19:34,632 --> 00:19:37,844
AT A MICHAEL JACKSON
CONCERT.

373
00:19:37,885 --> 00:19:39,428
[laughter]

374
00:19:39,470 --> 00:19:42,473
OH, IT--

375
00:19:46,435 --> 00:19:49,522
2012 IS FOR REAL.

376
00:19:49,563 --> 00:19:52,316
THEY SAID THE MAYANS
WAS TALKING ABOUT 2012.

377
00:19:52,358 --> 00:19:55,778
THEN THEY SAID
THE MAYANS DISAPPEARED.

378
00:19:55,820 --> 00:19:57,947
I'M HERE TO TELL
MY PEOPLE IT'S TIME

379
00:19:57,989 --> 00:20:00,616
TO STOP BELIEVING BULLSHIT

380
00:20:00,658 --> 00:20:03,494
JUST 'CAUSE A MOTHERFUCKER
TELL YOU BULLSHIT

381
00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:05,872
WITH A STRAIGHT
LOOK ON THEIR FACE.

382
00:20:05,913 --> 00:20:07,331
WE TOO OLD, WE TOO SMART.

383
00:20:07,373 --> 00:20:10,835
WE TOO MOTHERFUCKING GOOD
TO BELIEVE SHIT

384
00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:13,337
DON'T MAKE
NO FUCKING SENSE.

385
00:20:13,379 --> 00:20:16,174
YOU'RE TOO OLD TO BE
BELIEVING IN EVOLUTION

386
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:19,510
WITH YOUR STUPID,
MOTHERFUCKIN' ASS.

387
00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:22,471
EVOLUTION SAY PEOPLE
CAME FROM MONKEYS,

388
00:20:22,513 --> 00:20:25,683
AND THE QUESTION IS,
"WHY IS THERE STILL MONKEYS,

389
00:20:25,725 --> 00:20:28,227
YOU DUMB
MOTHERFUCKER, YOU?"

390
00:20:28,268 --> 00:20:31,230
IS THESE
THE RETARDED MONKEYS?

391
00:20:31,271 --> 00:20:34,441
THEY DIDN'T
TURN INTO PEOPLE JUST YET?

392
00:20:34,483 --> 00:20:37,904
GET YOUR STUPID ASS
THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

393
00:20:37,945 --> 00:20:39,739
[laughter]

394
00:20:39,780 --> 00:20:41,448
FITTIN' TO BE 2012,

395
00:20:41,490 --> 00:20:44,243
AND YOU BETTER
BELIEVE SOMETHING.

396
00:20:44,284 --> 00:20:46,286
DON'T NOBODY GIVE A FUCK
WHAT YOU BELIEVE.

397
00:20:46,328 --> 00:20:48,372
YOU BETTER
BELIEVE SOMETHING.

398
00:20:48,414 --> 00:20:50,416
IF THERE'S ANY ATHEISTS
IN THE HOUSE,

399
00:20:50,457 --> 00:20:54,461
LET ME SAY,
"YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS."

400
00:20:54,503 --> 00:20:56,630
I DON'T CARE WHAT GOD
YOU BELIEVE IN,

401
00:20:56,672 --> 00:20:58,841
YOU GOT TO BE
A SPECIAL KIND OF RETARDED

402
00:20:58,883 --> 00:21:03,804
TO BE TOO STUPID TO MAKE UP
A GOD IF THERE WASN'T ONE.

403
00:21:03,846 --> 00:21:07,433
POOR THING,
WHO DO YOU EVEN PRAY TO?

404
00:21:07,474 --> 00:21:09,351
NOBODY.

405
00:21:09,393 --> 00:21:10,895
EVEN WHEN YOU'RE FUCKING,
WHY DO YOU FUCK?

406
00:21:10,937 --> 00:21:12,271
YOU CAN'T EVEN COME.

407
00:21:12,312 --> 00:21:14,690
WHAT DO YOU SAY WHEN YOU COME,
ATHEIST?

408
00:21:14,732 --> 00:21:15,983
"OH, OH, OH..."

409
00:21:16,025 --> 00:21:17,944
NOTHING.
THAT'S RIGHT.

410
00:21:17,985 --> 00:21:19,612
'CAUSE THAT'S
WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN.

411
00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:20,905
YOU CAN'T EVEN--

412
00:21:20,947 --> 00:21:25,451
[laughter]

413
00:21:27,870 --> 00:21:31,457
2012's COMING.

414
00:21:31,498 --> 00:21:33,459
WE ALREADY READY.

415
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:35,002
BEEN READY.

416
00:21:35,044 --> 00:21:36,921
I DON'T CARE
WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN--

417
00:21:36,963 --> 00:21:38,422
BELIEVE IN SOMETHING.

418
00:21:38,464 --> 00:21:39,966
WHITE PEOPLE,
LET ME TELL YOU THIS--

419
00:21:40,007 --> 00:21:42,342
EVERY TIME YOU SEE A NIGGA,
THAT DOES NOT MEAN

420
00:21:42,384 --> 00:21:47,014
THAT NIGGA HAS BEEN ENDORSED
BY OTHER NIGGAS.

421
00:21:47,056 --> 00:21:48,515
WHITE PEOPLE,
LET ME STAND HERE

422
00:21:48,557 --> 00:21:50,851
IN FRONT OF ALL THESE
NIGGAS AND SAY PUBLICLY,

423
00:21:50,893 --> 00:21:55,355
WE WERE SO MOTHERFUCKING
EMBARRASSED

424
00:21:55,397 --> 00:22:00,319
WHEN HERMAN, BLACK,
JIMINY-CRICKET-ASS CAIN.

425
00:22:00,360 --> 00:22:02,822
CAME OUT
THE GODDAMN WOODWORK.

426
00:22:02,863 --> 00:22:04,782
WHITE PEOPLE,
DO YOU SEE US?

427
00:22:04,824 --> 00:22:07,952
LOOK AT NIGGAS.
WE...

428
00:22:07,994 --> 00:22:13,124
WE HAD NO IDEA, WHITE PEOPLE.
WE HAD NO...

429
00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:16,752
AND SOME WHITE PEOPLE
LOOKING AT ME LIKE,

430
00:22:16,794 --> 00:22:18,629
"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT,
HIM FUCKING PEOPLE?"

431
00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:22,967
NO, NO,
WE DIDN'T CLEAR THAT NIGGA.

432
00:22:23,009 --> 00:22:24,677
[laughter]

433
00:22:24,718 --> 00:22:27,054
WE DID NOT CLEAR THIS NIGGA,
WHITE PEOPLE.

434
00:22:27,096 --> 00:22:29,431
DO YOU HEAR?

435
00:22:29,473 --> 00:22:32,434
AIN'T NOBODY KNOW THIS NIGGA.
THIS NIGGA...

436
00:22:32,476 --> 00:22:35,104
WHITE PEOPLE, LET ME SAY
WHEN NIGGAS FOUND OUT

437
00:22:35,146 --> 00:22:38,024
WHAT WITH THIS
NIGGA'S QUALIFICATIONS WAS

438
00:22:38,065 --> 00:22:39,483
FOR RUNNING THE COUNTRY,

439
00:22:39,525 --> 00:22:42,653
WHEN WE FOUND OUT
THIS NIGGA SOLD PIZZA...

440
00:22:42,695 --> 00:22:45,948
[laughter]

441
00:22:45,990 --> 00:22:47,992
LET ME USE YOUR WORD,
WHITE PEOPLE,

442
00:22:48,034 --> 00:22:50,661
WE WERE FLABBERGASTED.

443
00:22:50,703 --> 00:22:53,331
[laughter]

444
00:22:53,371 --> 00:22:57,584
THE AUDACITY OF THIS NIGGA!

445
00:22:57,626 --> 00:22:59,837
IF YOU DON'T GET YOUR
GOOD-PIZZA-SELLING ASS

446
00:22:59,879 --> 00:23:04,508
ON SOMEWHERE, HERMAN...

447
00:23:04,550 --> 00:23:05,926
NIGGAS THAT HAD
A HARD ENOUGH TIME

448
00:23:05,968 --> 00:23:10,597
TRYING TO GODDAMN
STICK UP FOR BARACK.

449
00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:12,350
HERE COME HERMAN CAIN'S
STUPID ASS.

450
00:23:12,390 --> 00:23:14,352
NIGGA, YOU CAN'T BE
NO GODDAMN PRESIDENT.

451
00:23:14,392 --> 00:23:17,479
NIGGA,
YOUR NAME IS HERMAN CAIN.

452
00:23:17,521 --> 00:23:20,524
THAT'S TWO REASONS
YOU CAN'T BE PRESIDENT, NIGGA.

453
00:23:20,566 --> 00:23:22,068
YOUR FIRST NAME
IS HERMAN, NIGGA,

454
00:23:22,109 --> 00:23:24,070
YOU CAN'T BE PRESIDENT
IF YOUR NAME IS HERMAN.

455
00:23:24,111 --> 00:23:26,697
NIGGA, SAY IT THREE TIMES,
HERMAN, HERMAN, HERMAN.

456
00:23:26,739 --> 00:23:28,699
LISTEN TO THAT.

457
00:23:28,741 --> 00:23:30,784
WE ALREADY HAD A FAMOUS HERMAN.
HE WAS A MONSTER, NIGGA,

458
00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:32,912
YOU CAN'T BE
NO GODDAMN PRESIDENT.

459
00:23:32,953 --> 00:23:34,705
TALKING ABOUT YOU SOLD
SOME GODDAMN PIZZA TO WHO?

460
00:23:34,747 --> 00:23:38,084
YOU DIDN'T
SELL IT TO NIGGAS.

461
00:23:38,125 --> 00:23:40,836
WHITE PEOPLE, WE NEVER HEARD
OF GODDAMN GODFATHER'S PIZZA,

462
00:23:40,878 --> 00:23:43,630
LET ALONE HAVE A SLICE.

463
00:23:43,672 --> 00:23:45,465
THAT NIGGA AIN'T BEEN
BEATING DOMINO'S.

464
00:23:45,507 --> 00:23:46,967
DOMINO'S HAS BEEN
BEATIN' THE DOG SHIT

465
00:23:47,009 --> 00:23:49,136
OUT OF THAT GODDAMN
PIZZA PLACE.

466
00:23:49,178 --> 00:23:50,679
HE CAN'T EVEN BEAT
LITTLE CAESARS,

467
00:23:50,721 --> 00:23:53,099
AND LITTLE CAESARS
AIN'T EVEN EVERYWHERE.

468
00:23:53,140 --> 00:23:54,683
HE SURE AIN'T GONNA
BEAT PAPA JOHN,

469
00:23:54,725 --> 00:23:57,435
THAT MOTHERFUCKER'S
ON CRACK OR SOMETHING.

470
00:23:57,477 --> 00:23:59,437
HE WANT TO MAKE THE PIZZA,
DELIVER THE PIZZA,

471
00:23:59,479 --> 00:24:01,399
EAT THE PIZZA,
BE IN THE COMMERCIAL.

472
00:24:01,439 --> 00:24:04,526
PAPA JOHN'S.

473
00:24:04,568 --> 00:24:07,571
WE AIN'T GONNA BE ABLE
TO BEAT HIM, HERMAN.

474
00:24:07,613 --> 00:24:09,407
YOUR LAST NAME IS CAIN, NIGGA,
YOU KILLED ABEL, NIGGA.

475
00:24:09,447 --> 00:24:11,825
IF YOU DON'T
GET THE FUCK UP OUT OF HERE,

476
00:24:11,867 --> 00:24:16,830
FUCKING IT UP FOR NIGGAS.

477
00:24:16,872 --> 00:24:18,874
WHOO.

478
00:24:18,916 --> 00:24:22,669
WHITE PEOPLE WANT BARACK OBAMA
OUT OF OFFICE SO GODDAMN BAD.

479
00:24:22,711 --> 00:24:25,756
OH, YOU SHOULD HEAR THEM
MOTHERFUCKERS ON TALK RADIO.

480
00:24:25,798 --> 00:24:27,507
OH, THEY HATE THIS NIGGA.

481
00:24:27,549 --> 00:24:29,593
IF THEY COULD
SAY THE WORD "NIGGA,"

482
00:24:29,635 --> 00:24:33,097
OH, THEY'D SAY IT EVERY--

483
00:24:33,139 --> 00:24:34,098
OH, THEY HATE THIS NIGGA.

484
00:24:34,140 --> 00:24:35,682
OH...

485
00:24:35,724 --> 00:24:38,685
OH, "GODDAMN,
HE'S FUCKIN' FUCKIN' UP

486
00:24:38,727 --> 00:24:42,689
THE GODDAMN COUNTRY
IS WHAT HE'S DOIN'.

487
00:24:42,731 --> 00:24:46,902
GODDAMN ENTITLEMENT.

488
00:24:46,944 --> 00:24:50,156
[laughter]

489
00:24:50,197 --> 00:24:54,785
POOR NIGGA, POOR NIGGA.
JUST...

490
00:24:54,827 --> 00:24:57,621
UNDERSTAND,
IT'S FITTIN' TO BE 2012.

491
00:24:57,663 --> 00:24:59,915
THE MAYANS
WASN'T BULLSHITTIN'.

492
00:24:59,957 --> 00:25:02,542
THE MAYANS SAID IT WAS
SOME SHIT OUT THERE,

493
00:25:02,584 --> 00:25:04,878
AND THEN SUDDENLY,
THE MAYANS DISAPPEARED.

494
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:07,173
NOW, THEY TELL US
THE MAYANS DISAPPEARED

495
00:25:07,214 --> 00:25:09,925
'CAUSE THEY CAN'T FIND
NONE OF THEIR FUCKIN' BONES.

496
00:25:09,967 --> 00:25:11,635
BUT LET ME REMIND YOU

497
00:25:11,677 --> 00:25:13,762
THAT YOU'VE CAN GO
TO ANY MOTHERFUCKIN' MUSEUM

498
00:25:13,804 --> 00:25:15,097
ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD,

499
00:25:15,139 --> 00:25:17,933
AND THEY
GOT A WHOLE 62-FOOT DINOSAUR

500
00:25:17,975 --> 00:25:22,771
FROM HIS NOSE
ALL THE WAY TO HIS NUT SACK,

501
00:25:22,813 --> 00:25:27,193
AND HIS TOES,
5 BILLION GODDAMN YEARS AGO.

502
00:25:27,234 --> 00:25:31,571
[laughter]

503
00:25:35,159 --> 00:25:39,746
HAD A LITTLE COMPANY USED
TO BE IN AMERICA CALLED NASA,

504
00:25:39,788 --> 00:25:44,918
STANDING FOR "NATIONAL
AIR SPACE EXPLORATION."

505
00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:47,963
[laughter]

506
00:25:48,005 --> 00:25:52,968
TAKE MY WORD FOR IT, NIGGAS,
IT STOOD FOR GOING UP THERE.

507
00:25:53,010 --> 00:25:56,096
LOOK AT WHITE PEOPLE--"THAT IS
NOT WHAT IT STOOD FOR AT ALL."

508
00:25:56,138 --> 00:25:59,141
[laughter]

509
00:25:59,183 --> 00:26:04,104
"THAT WOULD BE N-E-A-S-A.
WE DON'T KNOW WHAT HE'S T--"

510
00:26:04,146 --> 00:26:06,232
THE FACT OF THE MATTER IS

511
00:26:06,273 --> 00:26:08,901
NASA USED
TO REPORT TO US,

512
00:26:08,942 --> 00:26:12,821
LET US KNOW WHAT THE FUCK
THEY WAS DOING.

513
00:26:12,863 --> 00:26:17,034
AND FOR 40 YEARS,
THEY SPENT $500 MILLION A YEAR

514
00:26:17,076 --> 00:26:21,872
SENDING SPACE SHUTTLES UP,
BRINGING THEM BACK DOWN,

515
00:26:21,914 --> 00:26:25,209
AND THEY USED TO LET
US SEE 'EM WHEN THEY TOOK OFF.

516
00:26:25,251 --> 00:26:27,086
[imitates rocket]

517
00:26:27,127 --> 00:26:28,837
AND THEN WHEN THEY LANDED,
WE'D BE RIGHT THERE,

518
00:26:28,879 --> 00:26:33,842
AND WE'D SAY,
"SHOW US WHAT YOU GOT."

519
00:26:33,884 --> 00:26:37,721
THEN THEY STARTED
DOING SNEAKY SHIT.

520
00:26:37,763 --> 00:26:39,306
TAKING OFF
THE SPACE SHUTTLES

521
00:26:39,348 --> 00:26:41,892
AT 3:00 IN THE GODDAMN
MORNIN' AND SHIT,

522
00:26:41,934 --> 00:26:43,894
LANDING THEM
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.

523
00:26:43,936 --> 00:26:46,105
AND IF THERE AIN'T NOBODY
LOOKING, THEY'D JUST WALK OFF,

524
00:26:46,146 --> 00:26:49,108
JUST--[imitates rocket]

525
00:26:49,149 --> 00:26:51,235
[laughter]

526
00:26:51,277 --> 00:26:52,986
AND NOW ON CNN,

527
00:26:53,028 --> 00:26:55,906
THEY SAY
THEY JUST DISCOVERED

528
00:26:55,948 --> 00:26:59,868
16 NEW SUPER-EARTHS.

529
00:27:01,328 --> 00:27:06,292
16 NEW SUPER-EARTHS.

530
00:27:06,333 --> 00:27:10,588
NOW, LET ME SPEAK
FOR ALL NIGGAS WHEN I SAY,

531
00:27:10,628 --> 00:27:15,593
"WHAT THE FUCK
IS A GODDAMN SUPER-EARTH?

532
00:27:15,633 --> 00:27:18,971
"WE THOUGHT
THIS MOTHERFUCKER WAS SUPER

533
00:27:19,012 --> 00:27:23,809
THE WHOLE GODDAMN TIME."

534
00:27:23,850 --> 00:27:27,146
LOOK AT NIGGAS, "I DON'T
BELIEVE NONE OF THIS SHIT."

535
00:27:27,187 --> 00:27:28,772
IT'S TRUE, NIGGAS,

536
00:27:28,814 --> 00:27:31,858
THEY HAD IT ON CNN THE SAME
GODDAMN DAY I WAS ON CNN.

537
00:27:31,900 --> 00:27:33,860
HOW THE FUCK
COULD I HAVE MISSED THAT?

538
00:27:33,902 --> 00:27:35,821
THEY PUT THE SHIT
RIGHT UP UNDER ME,

539
00:27:35,862 --> 00:27:40,909
BLEW A NIGGA'S WHOLE HIGH,
JUST, "16 NEW SUPER EARTHS?"

540
00:27:40,951 --> 00:27:45,205
[laughter]

541
00:27:45,247 --> 00:27:50,043
THEY PLANNING
ON LEAVING US, PEOPLE.

542
00:27:50,085 --> 00:27:53,964
[laughter]

543
00:27:54,006 --> 00:27:55,799
PLEASE REMEMBER
WHERE YOU HEARD IT FIRST,

544
00:27:55,841 --> 00:27:57,884
RIGHT AT THE CUSP OF 2012.

545
00:27:57,926 --> 00:28:03,390
THEY ARE PLANNING ON LEAVING OUR
MOTHERFUCKIN' ASS RIGHT THERE.

546
00:28:03,432 --> 00:28:06,185
THEY GOT SPACE SHUTTLES
LINED UP

547
00:28:06,226 --> 00:28:11,064
WITH GPS NAVIGATION,
ONSTAR...

548
00:28:11,106 --> 00:28:13,233
[laughter]

549
00:28:13,275 --> 00:28:18,405
'CAUSE REMEMBER WHEN I TOLD YOU
THE 99%--THEM WAS NIGGAS?

550
00:28:18,447 --> 00:28:23,118
AND WE'RE
THE ORIGINAL NIGGAS.

551
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:28,290
RICH PEOPLE IS TIRED OF GOING
ON VACATION, SEEING NIGGAS.

552
00:28:28,332 --> 00:28:33,420
[laughter]

553
00:28:36,048 --> 00:28:39,092
RICH PEOPLE MAKE
$100 MILLION DOLLARS.

554
00:28:39,134 --> 00:28:43,930
CAN'T ESCAPE NIGGAS.

555
00:28:43,972 --> 00:28:47,767
MAKE $100 MILLION DOLLARS,
GO TO AFRICA FOR A SAFARI,

556
00:28:47,809 --> 00:28:51,689
AND ALL THEY WANNA SEE
IS SOME ANIMALS.

557
00:28:51,730 --> 00:28:54,941
NIGGAS EVERYWHERE.

558
00:28:54,983 --> 00:28:57,236
"IT WAS A NIGGA THAT LED US
TO THE GIRAFFE.

559
00:28:57,277 --> 00:29:00,489
AIN'T THAT A BITCH?"

560
00:29:00,531 --> 00:29:02,866
LOOK ON YOUR MAP
WHEN YOU GET HOME.

561
00:29:02,908 --> 00:29:05,202
LOOK AT EVERYWHERE
THAT NIGGAS ARE.

562
00:29:05,244 --> 00:29:09,122
SURE, THEY BROKE.

563
00:29:09,164 --> 00:29:10,374
SURE, THEY HUNGRY.

564
00:29:10,416 --> 00:29:12,000
[laughter]

565
00:29:12,042 --> 00:29:13,502
EVERY LAST
ONE OF THEM NIGGAS

566
00:29:13,544 --> 00:29:16,296
LIVE RIGHT UP UNDER A PALM TREE
ON A SANDY BEACH.

567
00:29:16,338 --> 00:29:17,964
GO AHEAD.

568
00:29:18,006 --> 00:29:21,760
TRY TO TAKE YOUR DUMB ASS
TO JAMAICA AND NOT SEE NIGGAS.

569
00:29:21,801 --> 00:29:24,304
GO ON.
THE WHOLE BAHAMAS.

570
00:29:24,346 --> 00:29:26,806
GO ON OVER THERE,
TURKS AND CAICOS.

571
00:29:26,848 --> 00:29:29,059
SEE HOW MANY
NIGGAS YOU SEE.

572
00:29:29,101 --> 00:29:32,896
GO ON TO HAITI.
NIGGAS, NIGGAS EVERYWHERE.

573
00:29:32,938 --> 00:29:37,901
JUST NIGGAS THROWN
ON THE STREET, JUST...

574
00:29:37,943 --> 00:29:40,904
STOMACHS GROWLING,
PERFECTLY TANNED.

575
00:29:40,946 --> 00:29:44,491
[laughter]

576
00:29:44,533 --> 00:29:47,119
BETTER BELIEVE SOMETHING.

577
00:29:47,160 --> 00:29:49,996
THIS SHIT GONNA COME
TO A MOTHERFUCKING END.

578
00:29:50,038 --> 00:29:51,915
BETTER HAVE SOMETHING
TO BELIEVE IN.

579
00:29:51,957 --> 00:29:53,417
IF YOU'RE A CHRISTIAN, MAKE SOME
MOTHERFUCKING NOISE IN THE HOUSE

580
00:29:53,459 --> 00:29:55,461
IF YOU'RE A CHRISTIAN.

581
00:29:55,502 --> 00:30:00,006
[crowd cheers]
OH, YES. YES.

582
00:30:00,048 --> 00:30:02,801
Y'ALL SUPPOSED TO BE
THE MOST EXCITED.

583
00:30:02,842 --> 00:30:04,470
OH. OH.

584
00:30:04,511 --> 00:30:07,889
AS LONG AS Y'ALL
DONE HAD IT ALL FIGURED OUT?

585
00:30:07,931 --> 00:30:10,016
OH...

586
00:30:10,058 --> 00:30:14,271
CHRISTIANS SUPPOSED TO BE
WALKING RIGHT UP TO 2012.

587
00:30:14,313 --> 00:30:16,898
[laughter]

588
00:30:16,940 --> 00:30:18,358
FACT OF THE MATTER IS

589
00:30:18,400 --> 00:30:22,362
SOME PEOPLE BEEN
LYING ON JESUS.

590
00:30:22,404 --> 00:30:24,948
AND HE'S FITTIN'
TO COME BACK.

591
00:30:24,990 --> 00:30:30,120
YOU AIN'T GONNA BE ABLE TO LIE
TO HIM WHEN HE LOOKING AT YOU.

592
00:30:30,162 --> 00:30:31,913
ALL THAT SHIT
YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT,

593
00:30:31,955 --> 00:30:34,500
JESUS GIVING A FUCK
'BOUT YOUR BUILDING FUND.

594
00:30:34,541 --> 00:30:37,795
[laughter]

595
00:30:37,836 --> 00:30:40,046
I BET JESUS DON'T KNOW
NOTHING ABOUT YOUR ROOF.

596
00:30:40,088 --> 00:30:41,965
I BET HE DON'T EVEN KNOW,
BET HE DON'T EVEN KNOW.

597
00:30:42,007 --> 00:30:43,049
MM-HMM.

598
00:30:43,091 --> 00:30:44,384
BETTER HOPE
HE DON'T COME BACK,

599
00:30:44,426 --> 00:30:45,969
'CAUSE SOMEBODY
BEEN BULLSHITTING.

600
00:30:46,011 --> 00:30:47,346
EVERYBODY AIN'T BEEN
TELLING THE TRUTH.

601
00:30:47,387 --> 00:30:48,347
SEE, ALL THESE
MOTHERFUCKERS BE TALKING

602
00:30:48,388 --> 00:30:50,056
ABOUT THE END OF THE WORLD

603
00:30:50,098 --> 00:30:51,975
'CAUSE THEY DON'T WANT
THAT MOTHERFUCKER TO COME,

604
00:30:52,017 --> 00:30:55,479
'CAUSE THEY KNOW THEY BULLSHIT
GONNA BE FRONT AND CENTER.

605
00:30:55,521 --> 00:30:57,147
LOOK AT THE ROMAN
CATHOLIC CHURCH.

606
00:30:57,189 --> 00:30:59,399
THAT'S THE FIRST CHURCH
THAT EVER WAS.

607
00:30:59,441 --> 00:31:01,151
BEAUTIFUL SHIT.

608
00:31:01,193 --> 00:31:04,029
THEY GOT SOME OF THE BEST CHURCH
YOU EVER FUCKING SAW.

609
00:31:04,070 --> 00:31:07,825
EVEN NIGGAS STOP AND WATCH IT
WHEN IT COME ON TV.

610
00:31:07,866 --> 00:31:09,075
JUST, WHEN YOU SEE--JUST--

611
00:31:09,117 --> 00:31:11,953
[imitates
religious chanting]

612
00:31:11,995 --> 00:31:16,916
[laughter]

613
00:31:18,877 --> 00:31:20,253
NIGGAS BE AT
THEIR HOUSE LIKE,

614
00:31:20,295 --> 00:31:23,173
"THAT'S SOME FLY-ASS SHIT
ON THE LOW, NIGGA."

615
00:31:23,215 --> 00:31:25,008
'CAUSE WE BE THINKING,
IF THE CHOIR CAME IN

616
00:31:25,050 --> 00:31:27,093
RIGHT AFTER THEM, NIGGA,
JUST--

617
00:31:27,135 --> 00:31:30,430
[rhythmically]
"JESUS IS COMING BACK."

618
00:31:30,472 --> 00:31:35,435
[chanting]

619
00:31:35,477 --> 00:31:37,855
THEN WE FIND OUT
THE PRIEST

620
00:31:37,896 --> 00:31:40,858
IS FUCKING LITTLE BOYS
IN THE CONFESSIONAL.

621
00:31:40,899 --> 00:31:44,027
WHOO! JESUS IS NOT GONNA BE
HAPPY ABOUT THAT.

622
00:31:44,069 --> 00:31:46,029
YOU BETTER TELL
SOME OF THEM NUNS

623
00:31:46,071 --> 00:31:47,656
TO START GIVING OUT
SOME PUSSY OR SOMETHING,

624
00:31:47,698 --> 00:31:50,950
'CAUSE YOU GONNA
HAVE TO EVEN THAT UP

625
00:31:50,992 --> 00:31:55,955
BEFORE JESUS GET BACK.
HE IS NOT--

626
00:31:55,997 --> 00:31:58,584
LET ME SAY, IF YOU'VE TRIED
TO LOOK FOR A GOD,

627
00:31:58,625 --> 00:32:00,293
AND YOU AIN'T GOT ONE,

628
00:32:00,335 --> 00:32:02,921
YOU COULD DO A LOT WORSE
THAN CHRISTIANITY.

629
00:32:02,962 --> 00:32:05,340
LET ME TELL YOU, IF YOU AIN'T
GOT NOBODY TO WORSHIP,

630
00:32:05,382 --> 00:32:06,592
YOU COULD GO FOR JESUS.

631
00:32:06,633 --> 00:32:09,887
JESUS HAS BEEN KICKING ASS
FOR A LONG TIME.

632
00:32:09,928 --> 00:32:12,890
JESUS--THAT IS--
HE IS SOMETHING ELSE.

633
00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:14,349
FIRST OF ALL, UNDERSTAND,

634
00:32:14,391 --> 00:32:19,020
YOU DON'T NEVER EVEN SEE
A PICTURE OF JESUS OUT OF FOCUS.

635
00:32:19,062 --> 00:32:20,146
EVERY TIME YOU SEE JESUS,

636
00:32:20,188 --> 00:32:24,568
HE RIGHT LOOKING
AT THE CAMERAMAN.

637
00:32:24,610 --> 00:32:27,153
HIS ROBES IS CLEAN,

638
00:32:27,195 --> 00:32:30,490
HIS PERM IS STRAIGHT,
CUT IN A BOB,

639
00:32:30,532 --> 00:32:33,660
GOT A NICE BEARD TO LET YOU KNOW
HE AIN'T NO PUSSY--

640
00:32:33,702 --> 00:32:37,414
AIN'T NOTHIN' TO BE
FUCKED AROUND WITH.

641
00:32:37,456 --> 00:32:39,165
[laughter]

642
00:32:39,207 --> 00:32:41,251
- WE LOVE YOU, KATT!

643
00:32:41,293 --> 00:32:43,044
- BETTER HAVE SOMETHING
TO BELIEVE IN.

644
00:32:43,086 --> 00:32:45,255
IT AIN'T A LOT
OF JESUSES OUT THERE.

645
00:32:45,297 --> 00:32:49,509
SOME OF THESE RELIGIONS
GOT TERRIBLE GODS.

646
00:32:49,551 --> 00:32:51,261
I LOVE THE BUDDHIST PEOPLE,

647
00:32:51,303 --> 00:32:53,639
THEY DON'T BELIEVE IN NOTHIN'
BUT PEACE AND LOVE.

648
00:32:53,680 --> 00:32:57,684
BUT, UH, IT'S GONNA BE
HARD FOR YOU TO GET, UH,

649
00:32:57,726 --> 00:33:02,188
NIGGAS TO SERVE
YOUR GOD IF HE...

650
00:33:02,230 --> 00:33:04,274
AIN'T BEEN TENDING
TO THE SELF CORRECTLY.

651
00:33:04,316 --> 00:33:07,277
YOU--I DON'T KNOW IF Y'ALL
HAVE SEEN BUDDHA BEFORE,

652
00:33:07,319 --> 00:33:12,115
BUT NIGGAS IS NOT
GONNA BE ABLE TO SERVE HIM.

653
00:33:12,157 --> 00:33:16,954
HE HAS AN OBESITY PROBLEM.
NIGGAS IS--

654
00:33:16,995 --> 00:33:18,455
JESUS WOULD'VE
HEALED THAT ALREADY.

655
00:33:18,497 --> 00:33:21,207
HE WOULDN'T EVEN COME OUT HERE
WITH NO DAMN SHIRT ON

656
00:33:21,249 --> 00:33:24,294
AND SOME PAMPERS AND SHIT,
TALKIN' 'BOUT--

657
00:33:24,336 --> 00:33:26,296
JESUS PROBABLY SOMEWHERE
WITH A SHAKE WEIGHT RIGHT NOW,

658
00:33:26,338 --> 00:33:28,298
GETTING READY
TO KICK SATAN'S ASS.

659
00:33:28,340 --> 00:33:32,135
[laughter]

660
00:33:37,056 --> 00:33:38,391
CAN'T BE SERVING NO BUDDHA,

661
00:33:38,433 --> 00:33:41,269
THAT NIGGA LOOK LIKE RICK ROSS
IN THE PERIPHERAL.

662
00:33:41,311 --> 00:33:42,646
YOU GET TO HEAVEN,
THAT NIGGA--

663
00:33:42,688 --> 00:33:45,482
"OH...

664
00:33:45,524 --> 00:33:48,694
I THINK I'M BIG. NEAT."
JESUS?

665
00:33:48,735 --> 00:33:54,115
[laughter]

666
00:33:54,157 --> 00:33:56,159
CAN'T SERVE THE HINDU GOD.

667
00:33:56,201 --> 00:33:58,704
HINDU GOD IS TOO CONFUSING
FOR NIGGAS.

668
00:33:58,745 --> 00:34:00,372
HINDU GOD IS A WOMAN,

669
00:34:00,413 --> 00:34:04,710
AND SHE GREEN, AND SHE GOT
EIGHT ARMS, AND STAND LIKE THIS.

670
00:34:06,211 --> 00:34:07,796
NO, WE MIGHT WANT
TO FUCK THAT BITCH ONCE,

671
00:34:07,838 --> 00:34:12,676
BUT WE'RE NOT GONNA BE...

672
00:34:12,718 --> 00:34:14,011
GOTTA HAVE SOMETHING
TO BELIEVE IN.

673
00:34:14,052 --> 00:34:16,179
GOTTA BELIEVE IN SOMETHING.

674
00:34:16,221 --> 00:34:18,139
THE INDIANS, THEY TRIED
TO MAKE EVERYTHING A GOD.

675
00:34:18,181 --> 00:34:20,058
YOU CAN'T PLAY
WITH GOD LIKE THAT.

676
00:34:20,099 --> 00:34:21,393
NIGGAS DON'T WANT
EVERYTHING TO BE A GOD.

677
00:34:21,434 --> 00:34:24,688
YOU CAN'T HAVE
NO CORN GOD, NIGGA.

678
00:34:24,730 --> 00:34:26,398
"THERE'S THE GOD
OF THE WIND, AND--"

679
00:34:26,439 --> 00:34:28,734
NO, HOLD ON.
HOLD ON.

680
00:34:28,775 --> 00:34:30,235
"NO, IT'S THE CORN GOD."

681
00:34:30,276 --> 00:34:32,696
AIN'T NOT GODDAMN CORN GOD,
MR. INDIAN.

682
00:34:32,738 --> 00:34:34,322
"IT'S THE GOD OF THE CORN."

683
00:34:34,364 --> 00:34:37,200
NO, IT'S NOT, BECAUSE
WHAT IS THAT IN MY FECES?

684
00:34:37,242 --> 00:34:38,368
IS THAT...

685
00:34:38,410 --> 00:34:43,415
[laughter]

686
00:34:47,753 --> 00:34:49,295
Y'ALL BE CAREFUL.

687
00:34:49,337 --> 00:34:50,797
I HEARD MITT ROMNEY
WAS A MORMON,

688
00:34:50,839 --> 00:34:52,632
AND I DIDN'T KNOW SHIT
ABOUT THE MORMONS.

689
00:34:52,674 --> 00:34:54,051
AND I LOOKED UP THE BOOK

690
00:34:54,092 --> 00:34:56,219
AND FOUND OUT THEY HAVE
MULTIPLE WIVES.

691
00:34:56,261 --> 00:34:57,846
I HURRY UP, CLOSED THE BOOK.
THAT'S SOME PIMP SHIT.

692
00:34:57,888 --> 00:35:01,516
KEEP THAT.
WE MIGHT NEED THAT.

693
00:35:01,558 --> 00:35:04,519
THAT MIGHT WORK OUT RIGHT THERE.
WE'LL KEEP THAT.

694
00:35:04,561 --> 00:35:10,108
GIVE THAT SOME PRAYERFUL
CONSIDERATION THERE, YOU KNOW.

695
00:35:10,149 --> 00:35:12,277
FITTIN' TO BE 2012,
IT'S ABOUT WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN.

696
00:35:12,318 --> 00:35:13,445
GOTTA FIND YOU
SOMETHING TO BELIEVE IN.

697
00:35:13,486 --> 00:35:15,113
IT'S ABOUT THE THREE Rs.

698
00:35:15,154 --> 00:35:20,285
IT'S ABOUT RELIGION,
RELATIONSHIP, 'RITHMETIC.

699
00:35:20,326 --> 00:35:23,413
[laughter]

700
00:35:23,455 --> 00:35:25,123
LOOK AT WHITE PEOPLE,

701
00:35:25,164 --> 00:35:30,420
"THAT IS NOT HOW IT'S SPELLED,
I'LL TELL YOU THAT RIGHT NOW."

702
00:35:30,462 --> 00:35:33,256
WORLD GETTING CRAZY.

703
00:35:33,298 --> 00:35:35,550
IF YOU BELIEVE IN THE BIBLE,
UNDERSTAND,

704
00:35:35,592 --> 00:35:36,551
YOU GOTTA BE CAREFUL.

705
00:35:36,593 --> 00:35:38,261
I DID ALL THIS SHIT,

706
00:35:38,303 --> 00:35:40,221
I WAS TRYING TO FIND WHATEVER
RELIGION WAS GONNA HELP ME.

707
00:35:40,263 --> 00:35:44,810
I EVEN TRIED RASTAFARIAN,
AND LET ME TELL YOU...

708
00:35:44,851 --> 00:35:47,395
THEY HAD MY ATTENTION,
LET ME TELL YOU, THEY--

709
00:35:47,437 --> 00:35:48,605
THESE MOTHERFUCKERS SAY,

710
00:35:48,647 --> 00:35:50,774
"WE BELIEVE EVERYTHING
CHRISTIANS BELIEVE.

711
00:35:50,816 --> 00:35:52,818
WE JUST BELIEVE
THE HIGHER YOU GET,

712
00:35:52,859 --> 00:35:55,528
THE CLOSER YOU ARE TO GOD."

713
00:35:55,570 --> 00:36:00,366
[cheers and applause]

714
00:36:00,408 --> 00:36:05,371
"WELL, I THINK
I'D LIKE TO TRY THAT."

715
00:36:05,413 --> 00:36:09,542
NIGGA GETS SO HIGH, HE TRIED TO
LOOK IN JESUS' WINDOW AND SHIT.

716
00:36:09,584 --> 00:36:14,506
[laughter]

717
00:36:20,178 --> 00:36:23,807
EVERYBODY WANTS YOU
TO BELIEVE SOME SHIT.

718
00:36:23,849 --> 00:36:25,391
FIND YOU SOMETHING
TO BELIEVE IN,

719
00:36:25,433 --> 00:36:27,560
GET YOU SOME PEOPLE
THAT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU,

720
00:36:27,602 --> 00:36:28,770
GET YOUR TEAM TOGETHER.

721
00:36:28,812 --> 00:36:30,188
THE SHIT
GONNA HIT THE FAN.

722
00:36:30,229 --> 00:36:33,316
THE BIBLE SAY,
"FIRST SHALL BE LAST,"

723
00:36:33,358 --> 00:36:35,485
AND I DON'T KNOW,
BUT SPEAKING FOR NIGGAS,

724
00:36:35,527 --> 00:36:39,322
WE HAVE BEEN
THE FIRST AT LAST

725
00:36:39,364 --> 00:36:40,824
FOR A LONG TIME.

726
00:36:40,866 --> 00:36:45,620
I DON'T THINK YOU EVER GONNA
BE ABLE TO BEAT US AT THAT.

727
00:36:45,662 --> 00:36:48,581
YOU AIN'T GONNA BE
ABLE TO OUT-LAST NIGGAS.

728
00:36:48,623 --> 00:36:51,501
WE'VE BEEN LAST--

729
00:36:51,543 --> 00:36:54,337
[laughter]

730
00:36:54,379 --> 00:36:55,881
GAY PEOPLE WANNA BE NIGGAS.

731
00:36:55,922 --> 00:36:58,341
THEY WANNA SAY
IT'S CIVIL RIGHTS. NO.

732
00:36:58,383 --> 00:37:00,426
NO, 'CAUSE AS A GAY PERSON,
YOU CAN BE GAY.

733
00:37:00,468 --> 00:37:04,222
YOU JUST--IT'S ABOUT WHAT KIND
OF PERSON YOU ARE GAY.

734
00:37:04,263 --> 00:37:07,517
AS A NIGGA, WE WAS TREATED
LIKE ANIMALS FIRST,

735
00:37:07,559 --> 00:37:12,438
THEN THEY LET US PUT ON CLOTHES,
THEN THEY LET US GET IN THE NBA.

736
00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:15,525
[laughter]

737
00:37:15,567 --> 00:37:20,279
WE GOT TO PROVE SOMETHING
FOR OURSELVES FOR GENERATIONS.

738
00:37:20,321 --> 00:37:21,781
LIKE, WHEN I'M TALKING
TO MEXICANS,

739
00:37:21,823 --> 00:37:24,409
I'M TALKING TO MEXICANS
LIKE THEY'RE REALLY NIGGAS,

740
00:37:24,450 --> 00:37:27,370
'CAUSE AS FAR AS WE KNOW,
THEY THE CLOSEST TO NIGGAS

741
00:37:27,412 --> 00:37:29,915
WE EVER SAW IN THIS
GODDAMN COUNTRY.

742
00:37:29,956 --> 00:37:31,958
WE THOUGHT
THEY WAS OUR NIGGAS,

743
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:34,211
WE WAS PROUD
THAT THEY HAD A COUNTRY,

744
00:37:34,252 --> 00:37:36,922
AND DECIDED TO COME OVER
HERE ANY MOTHERFUCKING WAY.

745
00:37:36,963 --> 00:37:39,925
WE THOUGHT THAT WAS
SOME AMERICAN SHIT.

746
00:37:39,966 --> 00:37:42,719
SEE, YOU GOT A LOT
OF POLITICIANS THAT TELL YOU,

747
00:37:42,761 --> 00:37:44,470
"WE NEED TO KEEP
SOME PEOPLE OUT."

748
00:37:44,512 --> 00:37:47,473
AIN'T NO MOTHERFUCKING PEOPLE
TO KEEP THE FUCK OUT.

749
00:37:47,515 --> 00:37:49,893
WE NEED EVERYBODY
THAT'S RIGHT THE FUCK HERE.

750
00:37:49,935 --> 00:37:52,687
SEE, WHAT YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
IS WHEN YOU WATCH THE NEWS,

751
00:37:52,729 --> 00:37:55,899
YOU SEE ALL OF THESE PEOPLE
TALKING SHIT ABOUT AMERICA.

752
00:37:55,941 --> 00:37:57,817
UNDERSTAND, THEY TALKING SHIT
ABOUT AMERICA

753
00:37:57,859 --> 00:38:01,320
FROM THEY LITTLE DUSTY-ASS,
PIECE OF SHIT-ASS COUNTRY

754
00:38:01,362 --> 00:38:03,448
WITH NO GODDAMN
AIR CONDITIONING

755
00:38:03,489 --> 00:38:08,411
AND NO WAY TO GET A MOUNTAIN DEW
AND A SNICKER BAR.

756
00:38:08,453 --> 00:38:11,372
THAT AIN'T
OUR GODDAMN FAULT.

757
00:38:11,414 --> 00:38:13,959
MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA SAY,
"WE SHOULD ALL BE EQUAL."

758
00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:17,254
BULLSHIT.
EQUAL TO WHAT?

759
00:38:17,295 --> 00:38:20,423
WE ARE BETTER THAN YOU.

760
00:38:20,465 --> 00:38:24,928
[laughter]

761
00:38:26,345 --> 00:38:28,848
DON'T BE ASHAMED
TO FUCKING SAY IT.

762
00:38:28,890 --> 00:38:30,433
WE'RE BETTER
THAN THEY ARE.

763
00:38:30,475 --> 00:38:34,312
WE WORK HARDER, WE TRY HARDER.
NOTHING BEATS US.

764
00:38:34,353 --> 00:38:37,607
WE HAVE KICKED THIS RECESSION
SO MOTHERFUCKING HARD.

765
00:38:37,649 --> 00:38:40,443
FIRST OF ALL, NIGGAS,
LET ME SAY WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW

766
00:38:40,485 --> 00:38:44,530
IT WAS A RECESSION
UNTIL THEY GAVE IT A WORD.

767
00:38:44,572 --> 00:38:46,532
THIS IS THE SHIT NIGGAS
WAS DOING THE WHOLE TIME,

768
00:38:46,574 --> 00:38:48,451
WHITE PEOPLE,
WELCOME ABOARD.

769
00:38:48,493 --> 00:38:50,328
WELCOME ABOARD,

770
00:38:50,369 --> 00:38:52,705
GET YOURSELF SOME TOP RAMEN,
MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE.

771
00:38:52,747 --> 00:38:55,625
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL.

772
00:38:55,667 --> 00:38:58,544
[cheers and applause]

773
00:38:58,586 --> 00:39:01,965
AMERICA AIN'T ABOUT
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENS TO YOU.

774
00:39:02,007 --> 00:39:04,467
AMERICA IS
ABOUT WHAT THE FUCK YOU DO

775
00:39:04,509 --> 00:39:07,428
WHEN THE SHIT
HAPPENS TO YOU.

776
00:39:07,470 --> 00:39:10,640
SO, NOW...

777
00:39:10,682 --> 00:39:12,725
- PREACH ON, KATT!

778
00:39:12,767 --> 00:39:15,645
- I HAVE TO COME BACK
AND TELL MY PEOPLE

779
00:39:15,687 --> 00:39:17,355
THEY FITTIN' TO FUCK US.

780
00:39:17,396 --> 00:39:20,483
WHEN YOU GO HOME
INTO YOUR 2012,

781
00:39:20,525 --> 00:39:22,652
UNDERSTAND THEY ALREADY
HAVE CONCENTRATION CAMPS

782
00:39:22,694 --> 00:39:25,697
IN THE UNITED STATES
OF MOTHERFUCKING AMERICA

783
00:39:25,738 --> 00:39:28,950
THAT THEY'VE BEEN BUILDING
FOR FOUR YEARS NOW.

784
00:39:28,992 --> 00:39:30,493
AND THE QUESTION IS,

785
00:39:30,535 --> 00:39:35,040
WHO IN THE FUCK IS YOU
FITTIN' TO PUT IN THERE?

786
00:39:35,081 --> 00:39:36,916
WE ALREADY GOT A PRISON,

787
00:39:36,958 --> 00:39:41,004
AND THAT MOTHERFUCKER
IS SO PACKED.

788
00:39:41,046 --> 00:39:44,341
'CAUSE AT THE END OF THE DAY,
IT'S ALL BULLSHIT.

789
00:39:44,382 --> 00:39:46,551
IT'S ALL BULLSHIT,
WHITE PEOPLE.

790
00:39:46,592 --> 00:39:48,511
CONRAD MURRAY
GOT FOUR YEARS,

791
00:39:48,553 --> 00:39:50,096
AND AIN'T GONNA DO
BUT TWO OF THEM,

792
00:39:50,138 --> 00:39:52,682
AND MOTHERFUCKERS LOOKING AT HIM
LIKE HE GOT WHAT HE DESERVED.

793
00:39:52,724 --> 00:39:56,061
HOW THE FUCK DO YOU FIGURE HE
GOT WHAT THE FUCK HE DESERVED?

794
00:39:56,102 --> 00:39:57,979
YOU CAN MURDER
A BILLIONAIRE,

795
00:39:58,021 --> 00:40:00,690
AND GET 2 1/2 YEARS
AND PROBATION?

796
00:40:00,732 --> 00:40:02,984
THESE NIGGAS HAD ME
ON SIX YEARS OF PROBATION

797
00:40:03,026 --> 00:40:07,155
FOR A BLUNT
I HADN'T LIT YET.

798
00:40:07,197 --> 00:40:11,826
[cheers and applause]

799
00:40:11,868 --> 00:40:16,539
UNDERSTAND THE BULLSHIT
IS HITTING THE FAN, GOD DAMN IT.

800
00:40:16,581 --> 00:40:18,041
THEY GAVE CONRAD MURRAY'S
MOTHERFUCKING ASS

801
00:40:18,083 --> 00:40:19,918
LESS THAN
FOUR GODDAMN YEARS.

802
00:40:19,959 --> 00:40:21,419
UNDERSTAND, WHITE PEOPLE,

803
00:40:21,460 --> 00:40:26,716
THAT ONCE WAS A MAN
NAMED PLAXICO BURRESS.

804
00:40:26,758 --> 00:40:31,763
NOW, THIS NIGGA SHOT
HIS SELF IN THE GODDAMN LEG.

805
00:40:31,804 --> 00:40:33,598
UNDERSTAND THAT.

806
00:40:33,639 --> 00:40:37,977
THIS NIGGA
ASSAULTED HIMSELF.

807
00:40:38,019 --> 00:40:40,063
[laughter]

808
00:40:40,105 --> 00:40:42,774
HE DIDN'T SNITCH
ON HIS SELF,

809
00:40:42,815 --> 00:40:47,946
DIDN'T TURN HIS SELF IN,
FILE CHARGES AGAINST HIMSELF.

810
00:40:47,987 --> 00:40:51,824
THREE WHOLE YEARS
PENITENTIARY

811
00:40:51,866 --> 00:40:54,827
SHOOTING YOURSELF.

812
00:40:54,869 --> 00:40:59,791
[laughter]

813
00:41:04,837 --> 00:41:07,173
AND I KNOW SOME OF Y'ALL
LOOKING AT ME LIKE,

814
00:41:07,215 --> 00:41:11,761
"YOU NOT FITTIN'
TO TALK ABOUT MICHAEL, ARE YOU?"

815
00:41:11,803 --> 00:41:13,430
YES, I AM.

816
00:41:13,471 --> 00:41:14,973
FIRST OF ALL,
LET ME START OFF BY SAYING,

817
00:41:15,014 --> 00:41:17,892
WOULD ALL THE MICHAEL JACKSON
FANS PLEASE MAKE SOME NOISE

818
00:41:17,934 --> 00:41:19,978
IN THE BUILDING
THIS EVENING?

819
00:41:20,019 --> 00:41:24,983
[cheers and applause]

820
00:41:25,024 --> 00:41:27,485
I DON'T APOLOGIZE OFTEN.

821
00:41:27,526 --> 00:41:30,155
THIS IS NOT A TIME
FOR ME TO START.

822
00:41:30,196 --> 00:41:33,032
[laughter]

823
00:41:33,074 --> 00:41:36,202
BUT WHEN I WAS TALKING, I WAS
TALKING ABOUT SOMEBODY LIVE.

824
00:41:36,244 --> 00:41:37,495
- GO AHEAD, KATT!

825
00:41:37,536 --> 00:41:39,164
- AND THE FACT
OF THE MATTER IS

826
00:41:39,205 --> 00:41:42,500
WE WATCHED THIS NIGGA
GET MURDERED,

827
00:41:42,541 --> 00:41:45,837
RIGHT IN FRONT
OF OUR OWN MOTHERFUCKING FACE,

828
00:41:45,878 --> 00:41:47,797
AND THE NIGGA KNEW
IT WAS FITTIN' TO HAPPEN.

829
00:41:47,839 --> 00:41:50,758
HE TOLD US,
AND WE DIDN'T KNOW.

830
00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:55,096
NIGGA NAMED HIS LAST TOUR,
"THIS IS IT."

831
00:41:55,138 --> 00:42:00,226
[laughter]

832
00:42:03,062 --> 00:42:04,522
WHITE PEOPLE,
LET ME JUST TELL YOU

833
00:42:04,563 --> 00:42:08,734
A LITTLE NIGGA SECRET,
IF I COULD.

834
00:42:08,776 --> 00:42:11,196
NIGGAS HAVE NEVER SAID,
"THIS IS IT,"

835
00:42:11,237 --> 00:42:13,281
IN A CELEBRATORY FASHION.

836
00:42:13,323 --> 00:42:15,533
LET ME JUST SAY...

837
00:42:15,574 --> 00:42:16,993
WHITE PEOPLE
DO IT ALL THE TIME.

838
00:42:17,035 --> 00:42:18,203
"THIS IS IT!"

839
00:42:18,244 --> 00:42:19,745
NOT NIGGAS.

840
00:42:19,787 --> 00:42:21,164
EVERY TIME WE SAYIN' IT,
WE SAY IT LIKE THIS,

841
00:42:21,206 --> 00:42:22,665
"YOU KNOW WHAT, NIGGA?
THIS IS IT."

842
00:42:22,707 --> 00:42:25,084
[mic thuds]

843
00:42:25,126 --> 00:42:29,839
[laughter]

844
00:42:29,881 --> 00:42:32,217
AND THEY STRAIGHT UP
KILLED THAT NIGGA.

845
00:42:32,258 --> 00:42:35,220
KILLED HIM AND GAVE US
THE MOST BULLSHIT STORY

846
00:42:35,261 --> 00:42:38,681
WE EVER HEARD
OUR ENTIRE LIFE.

847
00:42:38,723 --> 00:42:41,851
FIRST, THEY TOLD US
THIS NIGGA WAS A DRUG ADDICT.

848
00:42:41,893 --> 00:42:47,023
THEN WE FIND OUT
THIS NIGGA'S DRUG WAS SLEEP.

849
00:42:47,065 --> 00:42:52,153
[laughter]

850
00:42:55,240 --> 00:43:00,703
ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS NIGGA
GOT HIGH AND WENT TO SLEEP?

851
00:43:02,247 --> 00:43:06,042
YEAH,
THAT'S NO DRUG ADDICT.

852
00:43:06,084 --> 00:43:10,713
SOMETHING'S AFOUL HERE.
THIS STORY DON'T GO TOGETHER.

853
00:43:10,755 --> 00:43:15,927
UNDERSTAND, WHITE PEOPLE,
NO STORY ENDS WITH COMA.

854
00:43:17,970 --> 00:43:22,683
BUT CERTAINLY,
NO STORY STARTS WITH COMA.

855
00:43:22,725 --> 00:43:26,187
THEY STARTED THIS NIGGA'S
STORY OFF WITH COMA.

856
00:43:26,229 --> 00:43:28,147
SAID, "NIGGA..."

857
00:43:28,189 --> 00:43:29,899
I DON'T KNOW
HOW HE WOULD SLEEP.

858
00:43:29,941 --> 00:43:33,069
I'M SURE HE DON'T SLEEP REGULAR,
BUT I'M SURE HE WAS--

859
00:43:33,111 --> 00:43:38,199
[laughter and applause]

860
00:43:45,206 --> 00:43:50,711
I DON'T KNOW HOW HE WOULD SLEEP,
BUT I KNOW HE SLEPT FANCY.

861
00:43:50,753 --> 00:43:52,589
[laughter]

862
00:43:52,630 --> 00:43:57,760
THE NEXT STORY IS THIS NIGGA
WAS ASLEEP, IN A COMA.

863
00:44:00,305 --> 00:44:03,975
THEN THEY SAY HE WAKES UP
OUT OF HIS COMA.

864
00:44:04,016 --> 00:44:07,937
NOW, UNDERSTAND, NIGGAS,
THE WHOLE THING ABOUT A COMA

865
00:44:07,979 --> 00:44:12,233
IS SUPPOSED TO BE YOU CAN'T
GET THE FUCK UP FROM ONE.

866
00:44:12,275 --> 00:44:15,903
I'LL COME BACK
TO THAT PART LATER.

867
00:44:15,945 --> 00:44:21,033
SO, THE NIGGA WAKES UP
OUT OF THE COMA.

868
00:44:22,827 --> 00:44:26,956
[laughter]

869
00:44:26,998 --> 00:44:29,750
"CONRAD?

870
00:44:29,792 --> 00:44:33,338
"CONRAD,
WHERE ARE YOU?

871
00:44:33,379 --> 00:44:37,883
CONRAD, TITO,
SOMEONE, COME HERE."

872
00:44:37,925 --> 00:44:40,886
THIS IS WHERE THE STORY
GETS FUCKED UP.

873
00:44:40,928 --> 00:44:43,806
THEN THEY SAY
AIN'T NOBODY THERE.

874
00:44:43,848 --> 00:44:48,853
SO THEY SAY
HE GRABS THE PROPOFOL...

875
00:44:52,857 --> 00:44:55,985
AND INJECTS
HIS MOTHERFUCKING SELF,

876
00:44:56,027 --> 00:44:59,322
AND GOES BACK INTO A COMA.

877
00:44:59,364 --> 00:45:03,826
♪ GIRL, CLOSE YOUR EYES ♪

878
00:45:03,868 --> 00:45:08,373
♪ LET THE PROPOFOL
INTO YOU ♪

879
00:45:08,414 --> 00:45:12,709
[laughter]

880
00:45:12,751 --> 00:45:17,714
ARE YOU TELLING ME
THAT A NIGGA

881
00:45:17,756 --> 00:45:22,845
WOULD PAY SOMEBODY
$150,000 A MONTH

882
00:45:22,887 --> 00:45:24,889
TO DO SOME SHIT

883
00:45:24,930 --> 00:45:28,976
HE COULD WAKE UP OUT OF A COMA
AND DO FOR HIMSELF?

884
00:45:29,018 --> 00:45:31,354
YOU CAN KISS
MY MOTHERFUCKING ASS.

885
00:45:31,396 --> 00:45:34,857
THAT'S LIKE ME PAYING A BITCH
TO SUCK MY DICK AFTER THE SHOW,

886
00:45:34,899 --> 00:45:39,987
AND PAYING HER GIRLFRIEND
TO SWALLOW.

887
00:45:40,029 --> 00:45:43,824
[laughter]

888
00:45:47,370 --> 00:45:50,415
WHITE PEOPLE,
IT WAS A SET-UP.

889
00:45:50,456 --> 00:45:53,501
WE KNEW IT AS SOON
AS WE SAW CONRAD MURRAY,

890
00:45:53,543 --> 00:45:56,879
'CAUSE IT COULDN'T HAVE BEEN NO
NIGGA TO KILL MICHAEL JACKSON,

891
00:45:56,921 --> 00:46:00,049
BUT IT CERTAINLY COULDN'T HAVE
BEEN NO WHITE DOCTOR.

892
00:46:00,091 --> 00:46:02,051
OH...

893
00:46:02,093 --> 00:46:06,431
[laughter]

894
00:46:06,472 --> 00:46:08,807
IF A WHITE DOCTOR
HAD KILLED MICHAEL JACKSON,

895
00:46:08,849 --> 00:46:11,269
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN 600,000
NIGGAS IN MOON WALKING SOCKS

896
00:46:11,310 --> 00:46:16,815
THE NEXT DAY JUST RIOTING
AND DANCING AT THE SAME TIME.

897
00:46:22,821 --> 00:46:26,284
THEY GOT THAT PIECE
OF SHIT-ASS CONRAD MURRAY.

898
00:46:26,325 --> 00:46:27,952
THAT MOTHERFUCKER--

899
00:46:27,993 --> 00:46:30,162
THAT'S WHAT A SNAKE LOOK LIKE,
IN CASE YOU WANT TO KNOW

900
00:46:30,204 --> 00:46:32,498
WHAT A MOTHERFUCKING DEMON
LOOK LIKE IN PERSON,

901
00:46:32,540 --> 00:46:35,334
LOOK AT CONRAD MURRAY'S
MOTHERFUCKING ASS.

902
00:46:35,376 --> 00:46:37,002
THAT NIGGA WAS ON TRIAL--

903
00:46:37,044 --> 00:46:40,423
ANY TIME A NIGGA
CAN'T CRY.

904
00:46:40,465 --> 00:46:42,091
WHITE PEOPLE,
UNDERSTAND,

905
00:46:42,133 --> 00:46:43,551
NIGGAS EITHER CRY
ONE OF TWO WAYS--

906
00:46:43,593 --> 00:46:47,263
NOT AT ALL...
OR ALL THE WAY.

907
00:46:47,305 --> 00:46:50,933
[laughter]

908
00:46:50,975 --> 00:46:52,935
CONRAD MURRAY
WAS ON TRIAL FOR 14 WEEKS

909
00:46:52,977 --> 00:46:57,940
TRYING TO GET ONE TEAR
OUT HIS LYIN'-ASS EYES, JUST--

910
00:46:57,982 --> 00:47:02,861
[laughter]

911
00:47:06,449 --> 00:47:07,824
FUCK-ASS NIGGA.

912
00:47:07,866 --> 00:47:09,243
YOU LET--THE BIBLE SAY,

913
00:47:09,285 --> 00:47:12,538
DON'T BELIEVE NO NIGGA
THAT CAN'T SAY TRUTH.

914
00:47:12,580 --> 00:47:13,956
THIS NIGGA ALL ON TV,

915
00:47:13,998 --> 00:47:18,127
"I AM GOING TO
TELL THE TROOT."

916
00:47:19,420 --> 00:47:22,507
WHAT DID THAT NIGGA SAY
HE WAS GONNA TELL?

917
00:47:22,548 --> 00:47:25,468
"I AM GOING TO
TELL THE TROOT.

918
00:47:25,510 --> 00:47:28,971
I HAVE FAIT."

919
00:47:29,013 --> 00:47:31,516
THEN THAT NIGGA
HAD THIS TRIAL,

920
00:47:31,557 --> 00:47:35,311
AND HE EMBARRASSED
EVERY NIGGA IN THE WORLD.

921
00:47:35,353 --> 00:47:38,147
RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE
OF THE CONRAD MURRAY TRIAL,

922
00:47:38,189 --> 00:47:40,358
WHEN WE THOUGHT IT COULDN'T
GET NO FUCKING WORSE,

923
00:47:40,399 --> 00:47:42,234
THIS NIGGA BRING OUT
AS A WITNESS,

924
00:47:42,276 --> 00:47:46,155
THE OLDEST LIVING SLAVE
WE HAVE EVER SEEN.

925
00:47:46,197 --> 00:47:49,534
PLEASE TELL ME
YOU SAW THAT OLD BITCH.

926
00:47:49,575 --> 00:47:52,995
[laughter]

927
00:47:53,037 --> 00:47:58,167
THAT BITCH WAS
136 GODDAMN YEARS OLD.

928
00:47:58,209 --> 00:48:00,169
THAT BITCH...

929
00:48:00,211 --> 00:48:03,172
IT TOOK HER SO LONG
TO GET TO THE STAND

930
00:48:03,214 --> 00:48:07,343
THAT YOU KNEW THIS BITCH
WAS GONNA TELL THE TRUTH, SHE--

931
00:48:07,385 --> 00:48:11,972
[laughter]

932
00:48:21,273 --> 00:48:26,404
THIS BITCH WAS 136,
AND HER WIG WAS BRAND-NEW!

933
00:48:26,445 --> 00:48:31,033
HAD THE TAG
STILL IN THAT BITCH.

934
00:48:31,075 --> 00:48:33,952
HER SLAVE
MOTHERFUCKING ASS--

935
00:48:33,994 --> 00:48:37,206
THIS BITCH
SNUCK ON THE STAND.

936
00:48:37,248 --> 00:48:40,585
HOW DO YOU SIT LIKE A SLAVE?
SHE JUST...

937
00:48:40,626 --> 00:48:45,922
[laughter]

938
00:48:52,304 --> 00:48:53,514
EVERY TIME THE JUDGE
ASK HER SOMETHING,

939
00:48:53,556 --> 00:48:58,143
"EXCUSE ME, JUDGE."

940
00:48:58,185 --> 00:49:00,396
FUCKING JUDGE ASKED HER,
"IS CONRAD MURRAY GREEDY?"

941
00:49:00,438 --> 00:49:03,107
AND THIS OLD, DECREPIT BITCH
ACTED LIKE "GREEDY"

942
00:49:03,148 --> 00:49:05,276
WAS THE WORST INSULT
SHE HAD EVER HEARD

943
00:49:05,317 --> 00:49:10,364
IN HER GODDAMN--
"GREEDY? NO, CONRAD, AIN'T--"

944
00:49:10,406 --> 00:49:13,451
SHUT YOUR UGLY ASS
UP, BITCH.

945
00:49:13,492 --> 00:49:16,579
THAT WAS THE ONLY PROBLEM
WITH MICHAEL JACKSON.

946
00:49:16,621 --> 00:49:20,583
HIS FANS
WAS TOO GODDAMN NICE.

947
00:49:20,625 --> 00:49:24,629
NICE-ASS MICHAEL JACKSON FANS
LETTING CONRAD MURRAY'S PUNK ASS

948
00:49:24,670 --> 00:49:27,214
GO TO COURT
EVERY GODDAMN DAY

949
00:49:27,256 --> 00:49:30,217
WITH NO SECURITY.

950
00:49:30,259 --> 00:49:34,054
THAT'S WHY YOU GOT TO HAVE
SOME GHETTO FANS.

951
00:49:34,096 --> 00:49:36,098
YOU AIN'T GONNA BE ABLE
TO JUST KILL ME, NIGGA,

952
00:49:36,140 --> 00:49:39,226
AND GO TO COURT
LIKE EVERYTHING IS OKAY.

953
00:49:39,268 --> 00:49:41,103
IT'S GONNA BE A BITCH
TO HIT YOU WITH A BRICK

954
00:49:41,145 --> 00:49:43,272
EVERY TIME
YOU SHOW UP TO COURT.

955
00:49:43,314 --> 00:49:45,524
JUST, "I'M HERE--"

956
00:49:45,566 --> 00:49:50,696
[laughter,
cheers and applause]

957
00:50:01,998 --> 00:50:05,336
- WE LOVE YOU, KATT!
- FIVE MINUTES?

958
00:50:05,377 --> 00:50:10,341
[crowd cheering]

959
00:50:14,720 --> 00:50:16,639
- WE LOVE YOU!

960
00:50:16,681 --> 00:50:19,976
- ALL RIGHT, LET ME, UM...

961
00:50:20,016 --> 00:50:22,186
LET ME--LET ME JUST--

962
00:50:22,227 --> 00:50:26,482
LET ME JUST TAKE THIS TIME
TO SAY THAT, UM...

963
00:50:26,524 --> 00:50:28,150
FUCK.
OKAY, LOOK.

964
00:50:28,192 --> 00:50:31,487
JUST CUT THIS REAL QUICK
SO I CAN TELL Y'ALL SOMETHING.

965
00:50:31,529 --> 00:50:33,238
[laughter]

966
00:50:33,280 --> 00:50:34,239
CUT.

967
00:50:34,281 --> 00:50:39,244
OKAY.

968
00:50:39,286 --> 00:50:42,164
NO--NO BULLSHIT.

969
00:50:42,206 --> 00:50:44,709
I DON'T KNOW
EACH OF Y'ALL PERSONALLY,

970
00:50:44,750 --> 00:50:48,754
BUT I ALWAYS FEEL
A LITTLE MORE COMFORTABLE

971
00:50:48,796 --> 00:50:52,174
WHEN I'M UP HERE,
AND THE PEOPLE IS OUT HERE,

972
00:50:52,216 --> 00:50:54,176
BECAUSE
AT THE END OF THE DAY,

973
00:50:54,218 --> 00:50:57,596
I REALLY WAS NEVER TALL,
EVEN WHEN I STARTED.

974
00:50:57,638 --> 00:51:01,308
[laughter]

975
00:51:01,350 --> 00:51:04,186
I NEVER WAS REALLY SPECIAL
TO FUCKING LOOK AT,

976
00:51:04,228 --> 00:51:08,357
BUT WHEN I CAME TO L.A., NIGGAS
ACTED LIKE THEY UNDERSTOOD

977
00:51:08,399 --> 00:51:10,735
WHERE THE FUCK
I WAS COMING FROM,

978
00:51:10,776 --> 00:51:15,656
AND ALLOWED A NIGGA
TO BE THAT.

979
00:51:17,616 --> 00:51:19,577
- WE LOVE YOU!

980
00:51:19,618 --> 00:51:21,787
- SO WHEN I RETIRED,

981
00:51:21,829 --> 00:51:23,455
THERE WAS A LOT
OF THINGS GOING ON,

982
00:51:23,497 --> 00:51:25,374
AND I DIDN'T WANNA COME BACK
AND TELL Y'ALL

983
00:51:25,416 --> 00:51:29,127
WHAT THE FUCK IT WAS, BECAUSE
I WANTED Y'ALL TO BE PROUD OF ME

984
00:51:29,169 --> 00:51:32,506
FOR SOME SHIT,
EVEN IF I WAS FUCKING IT UP.

985
00:51:32,548 --> 00:51:36,218
BUT THEN THEY STARTED
ARRESTING A NIGGA SO MUCH.

986
00:51:36,260 --> 00:51:38,846
[laughter]

987
00:51:38,888 --> 00:51:41,097
UNDERSTAND,
YOU CAN ONLY GET ARRESTED

988
00:51:41,139 --> 00:51:46,520
MAYBE SIX TIMES BEFORE
IT AIN'T FUN NO MORE.

989
00:51:46,562 --> 00:51:49,231
I JUST WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND
THAT IF YOU GO TO TMZ,

990
00:51:49,273 --> 00:51:51,650
YOU WILL SEE THE FACT
THAT I'VE BEEN

991
00:51:51,692 --> 00:51:55,529
ARRESTED 14 TIMES
IN 46 MONTHS.

992
00:51:55,571 --> 00:51:57,531
WHAT I WANT YOU
TO UNDERSTAND IS

993
00:51:57,573 --> 00:52:00,576
YOU HAVE NEVER, EVER
IN YOUR LIFE SEEN ME

994
00:52:00,618 --> 00:52:03,245
STANDING IN A COURTHOUSE.

995
00:52:03,287 --> 00:52:06,791
NOW, PUT THEM
TWO THINGS TOGETHER.

996
00:52:06,832 --> 00:52:08,834
SATAN AIN'T SHIT.

997
00:52:08,876 --> 00:52:11,796
EVERYTHING HE TRY TO DO
HE LOSES AT,

998
00:52:11,837 --> 00:52:14,256
'CAUSE HE AIN'T SHIT.

999
00:52:14,298 --> 00:52:18,594
HIS PEOPLE AIN'T SHIT,
NOTHING HE LIKES IS SHIT.

1000
00:52:18,636 --> 00:52:20,512
ALL HIS PEOPLE IS UGLY.

1001
00:52:20,554 --> 00:52:22,264
THEY ALL STINK.

1002
00:52:22,306 --> 00:52:25,225
THEY WAS WORSE OFF
BEFORE THE RECESSION,

1003
00:52:25,267 --> 00:52:29,229
DURING THE RECESSION,
AFTER THE RECESSION.

1004
00:52:29,271 --> 00:52:33,442
HE AIN'T SHIT.
AND SO UNDERSTAND...

1005
00:52:33,484 --> 00:52:36,152
THAT EVEN IF THEY
WAS GONNA KILL ME

1006
00:52:36,194 --> 00:52:38,280
FOR THE SHIT
I GOT TO SAY,

1007
00:52:38,322 --> 00:52:40,240
I DON'T KNOW
WHY I'M STILL HERE

1008
00:52:40,282 --> 00:52:42,576
IN THE FIRST
MOTHERFUCKING PLACE.

1009
00:52:42,618 --> 00:52:47,163
WHAT I DO KNOW IS I'VE BEEN
WAITING MY WHOLE LIFE FOR 2012.

1010
00:52:47,205 --> 00:52:50,459
I'VE BEEN WAITING
MY WHOLE LIFE TO THINK

1011
00:52:50,501 --> 00:52:53,504
THAT THE END OF THE GODDAMN
WORLD WAS FITTIN' TO COME.

1012
00:52:53,545 --> 00:52:56,340
SO NOW, NIGGAS,
LET'S SAY IT DON'T COME.

1013
00:52:56,381 --> 00:53:00,385
CAN WE AGREE TO AT LEAST ACT
LIKE THIS GONNA BE OUR LAST TIME

1014
00:53:00,427 --> 00:53:04,849
ON THIS MOTHERFUCKER SO WE CAN
DO IT RIGHT ONE GODDAMN TIME?

1015
00:53:04,890 --> 00:53:08,184
WHAT I'M TELLING YOU IS,

1016
00:53:08,226 --> 00:53:11,856
BITCH NIGGAS IS DONE.

1017
00:53:11,897 --> 00:53:13,273
I KNOW WHAT YOU'VE
BEEN SEEING,

1018
00:53:13,315 --> 00:53:14,483
I KNOW WHAT YOU'VE
BEEN LOOKING AT.

1019
00:53:14,525 --> 00:53:16,401
I KNOW YOU THINK
TYLER PERRY MUST HAVE

1020
00:53:16,443 --> 00:53:20,698
46 MORE CROSS-DRESSING
DRAG QUEEN MOVIES LEFT IN HIM.

1021
00:53:20,739 --> 00:53:25,494
[laughter]

1022
00:53:25,536 --> 00:53:27,621
I'M NOT HOMOPHOBIC.

1023
00:53:27,663 --> 00:53:30,166
I HAVE NOTHING
AGAINST GAY WOMEN AT ALL.

1024
00:53:30,206 --> 00:53:33,169
POWER TO THE LESBIAN NATION.

1025
00:53:33,209 --> 00:53:36,505
MAY WE ALL EAT PUSSY
THIS EVENING, IF IT'S FEASIBLE.

1026
00:53:36,547 --> 00:53:38,214
[laughter]

1027
00:53:38,256 --> 00:53:39,508
BUT IT'S TIME FOR PEOPLE

1028
00:53:39,550 --> 00:53:41,343
TO STAND UP
FOR WHAT THE FUCK THEY ARE.

1029
00:53:41,385 --> 00:53:44,513
EVERYBODY CAN'T BE ASHAMED
TO TELL THE GODDAMN TRUTH.

1030
00:53:44,555 --> 00:53:46,390
IT CAN'T BE EVERYBODY
THAT WON'T SAY

1031
00:53:46,431 --> 00:53:48,392
WHAT THEY FUCK
THEY MEANT TO SAY

1032
00:53:48,433 --> 00:53:50,435
AS SOON THEY GET
THE OPPORTUNITY.

1033
00:53:50,477 --> 00:53:52,604
CHRISTIAN PEOPLE,
IT'S THE SAME FOR Y'ALL.

1034
00:53:52,646 --> 00:53:56,274
IF Y'ALL SO HOLY, IT'S TIME
TO GET MOTHERFUCKING HOLY.

1035
00:53:56,316 --> 00:53:57,693
IF YOU
BELIEVE IN SOME SHIT,

1036
00:53:57,735 --> 00:53:59,778
MAKE SURE YOU GOT
SOME RIGHT SHIT,

1037
00:53:59,820 --> 00:54:01,363
BECAUSE I'M TRYING
TO TELL YOU,

1038
00:54:01,405 --> 00:54:02,990
EVERYBODY CAN'T BE RIGHT.

1039
00:54:03,032 --> 00:54:04,658
I SAY FUCK
BISHOP EDDIE LONG,

1040
00:54:04,700 --> 00:54:07,452
AND EVERYBODY WHOEVER
WENT TO HIS GODDAMN CHURCH,

1041
00:54:07,494 --> 00:54:08,746
IS WHAT I SAY.

1042
00:54:08,787 --> 00:54:10,956
FUCK THE CHOIR,
THE CHOIR DIRECTOR,

1043
00:54:10,998 --> 00:54:13,375
THE PEOPLE IN THE CHOIR,
THE NIGGA ON DRUMS,

1044
00:54:13,417 --> 00:54:16,837
FUCK THEM
IN THE PARKING LOT.

1045
00:54:16,879 --> 00:54:18,589
[laughter]

1046
00:54:18,630 --> 00:54:20,758
NOT BECAUSE I'M HOMOPHOBIC,
BECAUSE I DON'T THINK

1047
00:54:20,799 --> 00:54:23,427
YOU CAN PREACH THE GOSPEL
WITH BOOTY ON YOUR BREATH.

1048
00:54:23,468 --> 00:54:25,721
I JUST DON'T THINK YOU CAN.

1049
00:54:25,763 --> 00:54:29,265
I'M NOT SAYING YOU CAN'T.
I DON'T THINK YOU CAN.

1050
00:54:29,307 --> 00:54:30,642
IT'S NOT MY FAULT.

1051
00:54:30,684 --> 00:54:32,352
WHEN I WAS EIGHT YEARS OLD,

1052
00:54:32,394 --> 00:54:34,479
THEY TOLD ME A BUNCH OF STORIES
THAT DIDN'T MAKE NO SENSE.

1053
00:54:34,521 --> 00:54:36,565
THEY PUT ME DOWN AND SAT ME
RIGHT ME IN FRONT OF THE BIBLE

1054
00:54:36,607 --> 00:54:39,860
AND TOLD ME A STORY
ABOUT SODOM AND GOMORRAH.

1055
00:54:39,902 --> 00:54:42,780
THEY TOLD ME IT WAS
TWO CITIES IN THE BIBLE

1056
00:54:42,821 --> 00:54:45,407
WHERE MEN LAY WITH MEN.

1057
00:54:45,449 --> 00:54:48,284
THEN THEY SAID
THE NEXT DAY,

1058
00:54:48,326 --> 00:54:52,664
GOD BURNT THE WHOLE GODDAMN
TWO CITIES TO THE GROUND.

1059
00:54:52,706 --> 00:54:54,374
END OF THE GODDAMN STORY.

1060
00:54:54,416 --> 00:54:58,921
NOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU
GET OUT OF THAT STORY.

1061
00:54:58,963 --> 00:55:00,672
I TOLD MY BROTHER,

1062
00:55:00,714 --> 00:55:03,008
"I DON'T GIVE A FUCK
IF YOU ARE THREE, NIGGA.

1063
00:55:03,050 --> 00:55:05,886
"THEY JUST SAID THEY WAS GONNA
BURN DOWN OUR BUNK BEDS

1064
00:55:05,928 --> 00:55:09,890
IF YOU GET IN
THIS GODDAMN BED."

1065
00:55:09,932 --> 00:55:13,477
[laughter]

1066
00:55:15,646 --> 00:55:20,985
IT'S JUST WHAT THE FUCK
THEY TOLD ME.

1067
00:55:21,026 --> 00:55:23,904
I JUST DIDN'T KNOW.

1068
00:55:23,946 --> 00:55:25,530
- ONE MINUTE!

1069
00:55:25,572 --> 00:55:28,492
- HEY, SOME OF YOU NIGGAS'
WATCH AIN'T RIGHT.

1070
00:55:28,533 --> 00:55:30,452
IS IT TWO, OR IS IT ONE?
LET ME KNOW.

1071
00:55:30,494 --> 00:55:34,957
IT'S TWO?
[overlapping shouts]

1072
00:55:34,999 --> 00:55:36,625
LET ME ASK THE WHITE PEOPLE.

1073
00:55:36,667 --> 00:55:39,628
WHAT--WHITE PEOPLE,
WHAT TIME IS IT, PLEASE?

1074
00:55:39,670 --> 00:55:44,758
[laughter]
[overlapping shouts]

1075
00:55:44,800 --> 00:55:46,969
IT'S TIME.

1076
00:55:47,011 --> 00:55:49,013
ALL RIGHT, PUT IT ON,
GODDAMN IT.

1077
00:55:49,054 --> 00:55:51,890
LET'S SEE IT.
HEY, WHERE MY PEOPLE AT?

1078
00:55:51,932 --> 00:55:54,350
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
NO MATTER WHAT,

1079
00:55:54,392 --> 00:55:57,646
WE ARE HERE AT THE CUSP
OF 2012, GODDAMN IT!

1080
00:55:57,688 --> 00:56:00,398
WHOO!
IT'S FITTIN' TO COME!

1081
00:56:00,440 --> 00:56:03,944
HEY!
WHERE MY PEOPLE AT?

1082
00:56:03,986 --> 00:56:06,697
OKAY, HOLD ON.

1083
00:56:06,738 --> 00:56:08,115
[cheers and applause]

1084
00:56:08,157 --> 00:56:11,493
audience: EIGHT...
SEVEN...SIX...

1085
00:56:11,535 --> 00:56:16,623
FIVE...FOUR...
THREE...TWO...ONE.

1086
00:56:16,665 --> 00:56:17,958
HAPPY NEW YEAR!

1087
00:56:18,000 --> 00:56:20,669
- HAPPY NEW YEAR!

1088
00:56:20,711 --> 00:56:25,674
[cheers and applause]

1089
00:56:39,897 --> 00:56:42,024
- IT'S REALLY GOOD
TO SEE THE PEOPLE

1090
00:56:42,066 --> 00:56:44,526
WHO, UM...

1091
00:56:44,568 --> 00:56:46,070
A SHOT WAS NOT GIVEN TO.

1092
00:56:46,111 --> 00:56:47,863
TO BE ABLE TO STAND
ON A GRAND STAGE

1093
00:56:47,905 --> 00:56:50,866
AND SHOW HOW THEY DO
THEIR CRAFT.

1094
00:56:50,908 --> 00:56:52,450
- ALL RIGHT, Y'ALL,

1095
00:56:52,492 --> 00:56:54,536
MAKE SOME NOISE FOR YOUR
HOST FOR THE SHOW, RED GRANT.

1096
00:56:54,578 --> 00:56:56,372
LET'S GO, Y'ALL!

1097
00:56:56,412 --> 00:56:58,414
- SEE, SOME OF Y'ALL
AIN'T GONNA LAUGH TONIGHT

1098
00:56:58,456 --> 00:57:01,043
'CAUSE YOU AIN'T
GOT YOUR SPIRIT RIGHT.

1099
00:57:01,085 --> 00:57:02,878
SO, HAVE FUN TONIGHT,
BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW

1100
00:57:02,920 --> 00:57:05,005
IF YOU GONNA BE HERE
TOMORROW, NIGGA.

1101
00:57:05,047 --> 00:57:07,799
ALL RIGHT?
THIS IS YOUR NIGHT.

1102
00:57:07,841 --> 00:57:09,093
[cheers and applause]

1103
00:57:09,134 --> 00:57:12,054
THIS BROTHER RIGHT HERE
IS FROM DAYTON, OHIO,

1104
00:57:12,096 --> 00:57:14,514
WHERE KATT
WILLIAMS IS FROM.

1105
00:57:14,556 --> 00:57:15,974
HE'S FUNNY AS HELL.

1106
00:57:16,016 --> 00:57:18,643
GIVE IT UP FOR MY MAN
MR. CLAYTON PERKINS, Y'ALL.

1107
00:57:18,685 --> 00:57:19,937
LET'S GO,
LET'S GO, LET'S GO.

1108
00:57:19,978 --> 00:57:22,064
- Y'ALL READY TO SEE KATT?

1109
00:57:22,106 --> 00:57:23,648
[crowd cheers]

1110
00:57:23,690 --> 00:57:26,151
WELL, YOU GOT ME NOW,
MOTHERFUCKERS.

1111
00:57:26,193 --> 00:57:27,903
YEAH, I WAS GEEKED
TO GET THIS MOTHERFUCKER.

1112
00:57:27,945 --> 00:57:29,571
I CALLED EVERYBODY I KNOW.
I EVEN CALLED MY GIRL.

1113
00:57:29,613 --> 00:57:30,948
I GOT TO BEAT BOXIN'
THAT SHIT.

1114
00:57:30,989 --> 00:57:32,741
"BABY, YOU AIN'T GONNA
BELIEVE THIS SHIT.

1115
00:57:32,783 --> 00:57:36,912
I GOT A MOTHERFUCKING JOB."
[beat boxing]

1116
00:57:36,954 --> 00:57:40,124
"A, A--A JOB."
[beat boxing]

1117
00:57:40,165 --> 00:57:41,541
THAT BITCH IS LIKE,

1118
00:57:41,583 --> 00:57:42,918
"GOOD, NIGGA, NOW YOU CAN
HELP ME WITH THAT RENT."

1119
00:57:42,960 --> 00:57:45,754
[beat boxing]
"RENT, RENT, RENT, RENT."

1120
00:57:45,796 --> 00:57:47,214
[cheers and applauses]

1121
00:57:47,256 --> 00:57:50,550
- [laughs] KEEP THAT ENERGY--
THAT SAME ENERGY GOING.

1122
00:57:50,592 --> 00:57:54,096
Y'ALL GIVE IT UP FOR MY GIRL,
CHAUNTE WAYANS.

1123
00:57:54,138 --> 00:57:56,765
- THAT'S RIGHT. Y'ALL LOOKING
REAL CONFUSED RIGHT NOW.

1124
00:57:56,807 --> 00:58:00,602
LIKE, "WHO IS THIS
DUDE WITH TITTIES?"

1125
00:58:00,644 --> 00:58:01,603
THIS IS A REAL QUICK
ANNOUNCEMENT

1126
00:58:01,645 --> 00:58:02,896
TO UNATTRACTIVE GIRLS--

1127
00:58:02,938 --> 00:58:05,441
IF YOU ARE UGLY
IN THE STRAIGHT WORLD,

1128
00:58:05,482 --> 00:58:06,775
TEN TIMES OUT OF TEN,

1129
00:58:06,817 --> 00:58:10,988
YOU'RE GONNA BE UGLY
IN THE GAY WORLD.

1130
00:58:11,029 --> 00:58:13,949
ALL RIGHT? SO...
[chuckles]

1131
00:58:13,991 --> 00:58:15,784
DON'T TRY TO COME
TO THE GAY LIFE

1132
00:58:15,826 --> 00:58:17,995
LIKE NIGGAS
AIN'T TREATING YOU SHIT

1133
00:58:18,036 --> 00:58:21,539
'CAUSE WE WON'T
EITHER, OKAY?

1134
00:58:21,581 --> 00:58:25,919
- IF YOU AIN'T LAUGHING YET,
YOU JUST STUPID.

1135
00:58:25,961 --> 00:58:28,588
THIS FEMALE RIGHT HERE
IS FROM ALABAMA--

1136
00:58:28,630 --> 00:58:30,882
MOBILE, ALABAMA.

1137
00:58:30,924 --> 00:58:34,511
BY WAY OF MOBILE, ALABAMA.

1138
00:58:34,552 --> 00:58:37,055
I LOVE HER TO DEATH, MAN,
KATT LOVE HER TO DEATH.

1139
00:58:37,097 --> 00:58:40,267
Y'ALL GIVE IT UP FOR MY GIRL
ASHIMA FRANKLIN, Y'ALL.

1140
00:58:40,309 --> 00:58:42,102
Y'ALL GIVE IT UP
FOR ASHIMA FRANKLIN, Y'ALL.

1141
00:58:42,144 --> 00:58:43,728
LET'S GO, LET'S GO!

1142
00:58:43,770 --> 00:58:45,105
- SHOUT OUT
TO ALL THE LADIES IN HERE

1143
00:58:45,147 --> 00:58:47,107
WHO SUCKING DICK RIGHT HERE,
ANY LADIES SUCKING DICK?

1144
00:58:47,149 --> 00:58:48,817
[cheers]

1145
00:58:48,859 --> 00:58:50,902
OH, SHIT.

1146
00:58:50,944 --> 00:58:53,697
AIN'T NOBODY ON THE FRONT ROW,
PLAYER.

1147
00:58:53,738 --> 00:58:55,824
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

1148
00:58:55,866 --> 00:58:57,617
HEY, YOU GOT A WHITE GIRL,

1149
00:58:57,659 --> 00:58:58,910
AND SHE AIN'T
SUCKING YOUR DICK, NIGGA?

1150
00:58:58,952 --> 00:59:00,871
WHAT THE FUCK?

1151
00:59:00,912 --> 00:59:02,498
NIGGA, KILL YOURSELF.

1152
00:59:02,539 --> 00:59:04,291
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON
WITH THIS MOTHERFUCKER?

1153
00:59:04,333 --> 00:59:08,253
YOU GOT A WHITE GIRL ON
THE FRONT ROW AT KATT WILLIAMS?

1154
00:59:08,295 --> 00:59:10,255
MAN, MARTIN LUTHER KING DIED
FOR NOTHING, NIGGA.

1155
00:59:10,297 --> 00:59:12,090
YOU GET YOUR GODDAMN ASS
ON UP OUT OF HERE.

1156
00:59:12,132 --> 00:59:14,885
- THIS MY MAN RIGHT HERE, MAN.
HE'S SIGNATURE, DOG.

1157
00:59:14,926 --> 00:59:18,013
HE A TWO-TIME
DEF COMEDY JAM ALL STAR,

1158
00:59:18,055 --> 00:59:20,682
AND HE IS HILARIOUS,
RIPPING THIS BITCH UP.

1159
00:59:20,724 --> 00:59:23,018
Y'ALL GIVE IT UP FOR MY MAN,
MR. WIL SYLVINCE, Y'ALL.

1160
00:59:23,060 --> 00:59:24,644
Y'ALL GIVE IT UP
FOR WIL SYLVINCE.

1161
00:59:24,686 --> 00:59:26,313
LET'S GO, LET'S GO.

1162
00:59:26,355 --> 00:59:30,734
- THE WORST SEAT IN COACH
IS THAT MIDDLE SEAT, ISN'T IT?

1163
00:59:30,775 --> 00:59:34,905
[laughter]

1164
00:59:37,074 --> 00:59:38,783
LOOK AT THIS, YOU GOTTA SIT
LIKE A GAY PERSON IN COACH.

1165
00:59:38,825 --> 00:59:40,160
LOOK AT THIS SHIT.

1166
00:59:40,202 --> 00:59:43,330
I'M A THUG.
I DONE SHOT SIX MOTHERFUCKERS.

1167
00:59:43,372 --> 00:59:45,165
LOOK AT...

1168
00:59:45,207 --> 00:59:47,209
[laughter]

1169
00:59:47,251 --> 00:59:49,086
- THIS IS MY HOMEGIRL.
SHE'S FUNNY AS SHIT.

1170
00:59:49,127 --> 00:59:50,921
SHE'S LIKE
THE MOTHER OF THE TOUR.

1171
00:59:50,962 --> 00:59:53,048
WANT YOU ALL TO KEEP
THE ENERGY GOING.

1172
00:59:53,090 --> 00:59:54,174
GIVE IT UP FOR MY HOMEGIRL
MS. PAT, Y'ALL.

1173
00:59:54,216 --> 00:59:55,800
LET'S GO, LET'S GO.

1174
00:59:55,842 --> 00:59:58,136
- ANYBODY MARRIED?
[cheers and applause]

1175
00:59:58,178 --> 00:59:59,888
I'M FOR REAL
ABOUT MY MARRIAGE.

1176
00:59:59,930 --> 01:00:01,181
I JUST GET IN THE BED,
AND I BE LIKE,

1177
01:00:01,223 --> 01:00:02,766
"BABY, YOU WANT
SOME PUSSY?"

1178
01:00:02,807 --> 01:00:04,893
[laughter]

1179
01:00:04,935 --> 01:00:06,895
'CAUSE IF YOU WANT IT,
I'LL WASH IT.

1180
01:00:06,937 --> 01:00:11,733
[laughter]

1181
01:00:11,775 --> 01:00:15,362
- MY HAIR WAS PROBABLY THE MOST
MAGNIFICENT IT'S EVER BEEN,

1182
01:00:15,404 --> 01:00:18,073
AND I REALLY LOOKED LIKE
THE MAYOR OF WHOVILLE.

1183
01:00:18,115 --> 01:00:20,284
MY WHITE FRIENDS
WILL APPRECIATE IT.

1184
01:00:20,325 --> 01:00:23,412
LONG LIVE THE GRINCH.
[laughter]