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Downloaded from
YTS.MX
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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(DIALLING BEEPS)
4
00:00:32,083 --> 00:00:34,473
I'm afraid I won't be in
till after lunch.
5
00:00:34,603 --> 00:00:37,163
No. Not ill. Shagging.
6
00:00:39,283 --> 00:00:40,558
Vision.
7
00:00:40,683 --> 00:00:42,117
Energy.
8
00:00:42,243 --> 00:00:43,916
Commitment.
9
00:00:44,643 --> 00:00:47,602
three career-enhancing words.
10
00:00:48,763 --> 00:00:50,641
Here's three more.
11
00:00:50,763 --> 00:00:52,755
Listen. to. Me.
12
00:00:54,843 --> 00:00:57,278
things are going to start changing
around here,
13
00:00:57,403 --> 00:00:59,520
and you can either change with them,
14
00:00:59,643 --> 00:01:03,603
or you can hand in your security
laminates and get the hell out
15
00:01:03,723 --> 00:01:08,036
of the globe's premier
broadcast service provider.
16
00:01:10,123 --> 00:01:13,116
Woolly thinking is for sheep.
17
00:01:14,123 --> 00:01:16,354
the fox gets the cream.
18
00:01:16,483 --> 00:01:19,635
Second-best is not an option.
19
00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:23,156
Stay...on...message.
20
00:01:23,283 --> 00:01:25,639
(MOBILE PHONE PLAYS
WILLIAM TELL OVERTURE)
21
00:01:27,243 --> 00:01:28,518
Sorry.
22
00:01:28,643 --> 00:01:31,158
- Yeah?
- My eggs are done.
23
00:01:31,283 --> 00:01:33,081
Screw me...
24
00:01:33,803 --> 00:01:35,078
now.
25
00:01:35,203 --> 00:01:37,399
Screw you? I'm in a meeting.
26
00:01:40,003 --> 00:01:41,437
Sorry about that, Nigel.
27
00:01:41,563 --> 00:01:44,522
Some of our junior people
have gone off-message.
28
00:01:44,643 --> 00:01:46,521
I'll be back in a tick.
29
00:01:55,003 --> 00:01:56,801
Excuse me. Excuse me.
30
00:01:56,923 --> 00:01:58,915
(ALARM BELLS RING)
31
00:02:12,923 --> 00:02:14,562
Maybe, baby
32
00:02:14,683 --> 00:02:16,322
I'll have you
33
00:02:16,443 --> 00:02:19,038
Maybe, baby, you'll be true
34
00:02:19,163 --> 00:02:22,839
Maybe, baby, I'll have you
35
00:02:22,963 --> 00:02:24,841
For me
36
00:02:25,843 --> 00:02:29,120
It's funny, honey, you don't care
37
00:02:29,243 --> 00:02:32,361
You never listen to my prayer
38
00:02:32,483 --> 00:02:33,963
Maybe, baby
39
00:02:34,083 --> 00:02:37,520
You will love me some day
40
00:02:39,083 --> 00:02:42,474
You are the one that makes me glad
41
00:02:42,603 --> 00:02:45,641
And you are the one
that makes me sad
42
00:02:45,763 --> 00:02:48,437
When some day you want me
43
00:02:48,563 --> 00:02:52,159
Well, I'll be there,
just wait and see
44
00:02:52,283 --> 00:02:55,196
Maybe, baby, I'll have you
45
00:02:55,323 --> 00:02:58,441
Maybe, baby, you'll be true
46
00:02:58,563 --> 00:03:03,957
Maybe, baby,
I'll have you for me...
47
00:03:16,923 --> 00:03:18,403
Morning.
48
00:03:18,523 --> 00:03:21,163
Well, you are the one
that makes me glad
49
00:03:21,283 --> 00:03:24,833
And you are the one
that makes me sad
50
00:03:24,963 --> 00:03:27,319
When some day you want me...
51
00:03:27,443 --> 00:03:29,275
Was it you who ordered the shag,
madam?
52
00:03:29,403 --> 00:03:32,282
Yes! Yes! Yes!
53
00:03:32,403 --> 00:03:34,315
Yes.
54
00:03:34,443 --> 00:03:37,834
Maybe, baby, you'll be true
55
00:03:37,963 --> 00:03:42,754
Maybe, baby, I'll have you for me
56
00:03:44,323 --> 00:03:49,079
Maybe, baby,
I'll have you for me.
57
00:03:51,483 --> 00:03:54,203
- Where the hell have you been?
- Sorry, Nigel.
58
00:03:54,323 --> 00:03:56,599
You know, very important meeting.
59
00:03:56,723 --> 00:03:59,522
Horizontally integrated,
deep penetration.
60
00:03:59,643 --> 00:04:01,362
Good.
61
00:04:01,483 --> 00:04:04,681
You haven't missed much.
We've been standing outside for an hour
62
00:04:04,803 --> 00:04:07,841
because some arse
set off the fire alarm.
63
00:04:09,763 --> 00:04:13,200
(LUCY) It seems to me that,
where trying for a baby is concerned,
64
00:04:13,323 --> 00:04:15,713
women's eggs are like boiled eggs.
65
00:04:15,843 --> 00:04:18,677
You never know exactly
when they're done to perfection.
66
00:04:18,803 --> 00:04:21,762
You just have to grab the moment
when it arises.
67
00:04:21,883 --> 00:04:25,513
Oh, sorry, but I just
had to have it now.
68
00:04:25,643 --> 00:04:27,635
Always a pleasure, never a chore.
69
00:04:28,643 --> 00:04:29,918
Oh.
70
00:04:30,043 --> 00:04:32,239
It is beautiful, isn't it?
71
00:04:32,363 --> 00:04:34,434
Yes. It's all right, I suppose.
72
00:04:34,563 --> 00:04:36,555
Not a patch on our wedding,
of course.
73
00:04:36,683 --> 00:04:39,960
What? A quick "I do"
at Chelsea Registry Office
74
00:04:40,083 --> 00:04:42,234
and a pork pie picnic in the park!
75
00:04:42,363 --> 00:04:45,162
Hold on. A pork pie picnic
plus a sonnet.
76
00:04:45,283 --> 00:04:47,752
Besides, it's not
how you get married,
77
00:04:47,883 --> 00:04:49,522
it's who you get married to.
78
00:04:50,443 --> 00:04:51,797
I was lucky.
79
00:04:51,923 --> 00:04:53,357
So was I.
80
00:04:53,483 --> 00:04:55,554
And do you still feel lucky?
81
00:04:56,803 --> 00:04:58,681
Despite everything?
82
00:04:58,803 --> 00:05:01,238
I feel lucky because of everything.
83
00:05:02,283 --> 00:05:04,002
Because you are my everything.
84
00:05:04,123 --> 00:05:06,479
For better or for worse.
85
00:05:08,883 --> 00:05:11,682
I really had hoped
it might work this time.
86
00:05:11,803 --> 00:05:14,955
What with us being so close
to a church and everything.
87
00:05:15,083 --> 00:05:16,995
Maybe next month.
88
00:05:18,723 --> 00:05:21,363
(PLAYS JAZZ PIANO)
89
00:05:32,963 --> 00:05:35,717
Come on, darling,
you did promise you'd try.
90
00:05:35,843 --> 00:05:38,677
I have tried.
I'm just no good at diaries.
91
00:05:38,803 --> 00:05:42,433
It's not a diary,
it's a letter to yourself.
92
00:05:42,563 --> 00:05:45,635
the idea being that
if we periodically assemble
93
00:05:45,763 --> 00:05:47,322
our thoughts and feelings,
94
00:05:47,443 --> 00:05:50,515
we will feel less like corks
bobbing on the sea of fate.
95
00:05:50,643 --> 00:05:52,236
I don't know what to write.
96
00:05:54,843 --> 00:05:57,312
I'm not going to pester Sam
about this.
97
00:05:57,443 --> 00:05:59,036
I know that he's hurting, too,
98
00:05:59,163 --> 00:06:02,076
and dealing with our problem
in his own way.
99
00:06:02,203 --> 00:06:04,957
He bought William, who is gorgeous.
100
00:06:06,323 --> 00:06:09,361
Keeping a journal
certainly has helped me.
101
00:06:09,483 --> 00:06:12,681
Whenever I want to cry,
I just write down my thoughts.
102
00:06:12,803 --> 00:06:15,875
The only problem is that
whenever I write down my thoughts,
103
00:06:16,003 --> 00:06:17,562
I just want to cry.
104
00:06:21,163 --> 00:06:22,643
It's no good.
105
00:06:22,763 --> 00:06:26,359
the only thing about me less fertile
than my balls is my imagination.
106
00:06:26,483 --> 00:06:28,475
Oh, don't say that.
107
00:06:30,563 --> 00:06:32,953
Oh, no. Lucy, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean that.
108
00:06:34,603 --> 00:06:37,357
that was just a silly joke.
We'll be all right.
109
00:06:44,003 --> 00:06:46,643
Hang on a sec. I'll just see
if I'm ovulating.
110
00:06:53,573 --> 00:06:55,610
I'm thinking of doing book-keeping.
111
00:06:55,733 --> 00:06:57,725
He's like a very, very short
Brad Pitt.
112
00:06:57,853 --> 00:07:00,607
We could save a ton of money
if we did our own accounts.
113
00:07:00,733 --> 00:07:03,009
Yes. A short ginger-haired
Brad Pitt.
114
00:07:03,133 --> 00:07:05,773
Good idea, but what if Sam
finally gets you up the duff?
115
00:07:05,893 --> 00:07:07,213
I could bring the baby to work.
116
00:07:07,333 --> 00:07:08,972
Oh, bugger that!
117
00:07:09,093 --> 00:07:11,847
I'm not having lactating breasts
flopping about.
118
00:07:11,973 --> 00:07:14,727
I think you're obliged to provide
créche facilities
119
00:07:14,853 --> 00:07:16,128
under European law.
120
00:07:16,253 --> 00:07:17,607
Be quiet, you stupid girl!
121
00:07:19,893 --> 00:07:23,330
I'm vegetarian
and I've just given up heroin.
122
00:07:23,453 --> 00:07:25,251
I'm not going through cold turkey,
123
00:07:25,373 --> 00:07:27,604
I'm going through really bad
cold nut-roast.
124
00:07:27,733 --> 00:07:29,053
Cut to a wide shot,
125
00:07:29,173 --> 00:07:31,005
and drop a laugh in.
126
00:07:31,133 --> 00:07:34,809
Do you think the nation's ready
to take heroin before nine o'clock?
127
00:07:34,933 --> 00:07:37,004
Well, it's what
the new controller wants.
128
00:07:37,133 --> 00:07:39,489
Jokes about drugs will put us
at the cutting edge.
129
00:07:39,613 --> 00:07:41,525
I like him, and so should you.
130
00:07:41,653 --> 00:07:43,565
He really wants us to make
more movies.
131
00:07:43,693 --> 00:07:46,447
Spool forward to the bit about him
being sick in his toaster.
132
00:07:46,573 --> 00:07:48,326
I thought you wanted
to write a movie.
133
00:07:48,453 --> 00:07:50,604
You talk about film scripts.
Here's your chance.
134
00:07:51,613 --> 00:07:52,888
How's young Cuthbert?
135
00:07:53,013 --> 00:07:56,165
Lucy says he's gorgeous. She can't
believe I haven't seen him yet.
136
00:07:56,293 --> 00:07:57,568
Well, why would you?
137
00:07:57,693 --> 00:08:00,447
He can't talk, he drinks milk
and he has no bowel control.
138
00:08:00,573 --> 00:08:01,973
What kind of evening would you have?
139
00:08:02,093 --> 00:08:03,971
(PHONE BEEPS)
140
00:08:04,093 --> 00:08:06,449
- Hello?
- You know they don't work in here.
141
00:08:06,573 --> 00:08:07,848
Duty calls.
142
00:08:09,093 --> 00:08:11,324
I might have to leave this edit
with you, George.
143
00:08:11,453 --> 00:08:14,651
- See you back at the centre.
- Yeah. Don't worry. I've got it.
144
00:08:14,773 --> 00:08:16,093
Got it.
145
00:08:17,253 --> 00:08:19,813
Cut three minutes off the end.
Let's go for a drink.
146
00:08:31,133 --> 00:08:32,613
OK. Here's Cuthbert.
147
00:08:32,733 --> 00:08:35,407
- this is him.
- Aah!
148
00:08:35,533 --> 00:08:37,889
I call him Prune,
which I think is fair.
149
00:08:38,013 --> 00:08:39,572
(MELINDA) Hilarious, George.
150
00:08:39,693 --> 00:08:43,130
I'd laugh, but I don't want to burst
the 12 stitches I got having him.
151
00:08:43,253 --> 00:08:47,088
You should have greased your perineum.
Vaseline. Never fails.
152
00:08:47,213 --> 00:08:48,567
(LAUGHTER)
153
00:08:48,693 --> 00:08:50,173
(SHEILA) Well, you do.
154
00:08:50,293 --> 00:08:52,888
It's got animal in it, this,
hasn't it? It has.
155
00:08:53,013 --> 00:08:54,970
No. Just a little bit
of chicken stock.
156
00:08:55,093 --> 00:08:56,971
Darling, you can't and nor should I.
157
00:08:57,093 --> 00:09:00,211
Putrefying flesh remains
in the colon for at least a month.
158
00:09:00,333 --> 00:09:01,733
No wonder you can't get pregnant
159
00:09:01,853 --> 00:09:04,812
with your bowels bursting
with rotting corpse.
160
00:09:04,933 --> 00:09:07,812
How are things at work, Sam?
George never tells me anything.
161
00:09:07,933 --> 00:09:10,289
- Oh, he hates it.
- I do not hate it.
162
00:09:10,413 --> 00:09:14,293
You do. You think you're old and
married and life's passing you by.
163
00:09:14,413 --> 00:09:15,927
We all make sacrifices
for our partners.
164
00:09:16,053 --> 00:09:17,931
Women make the real sacrifices.
165
00:09:18,053 --> 00:09:21,649
Look at Lucy. You didn't even finish
your degree, did you, darling?
166
00:09:21,773 --> 00:09:23,207
I'm about to pick it up again.
167
00:09:23,333 --> 00:09:25,928
I'm doing a Shakespeare module
for the Distant Learning Programme.
168
00:09:26,053 --> 00:09:29,933
Lucky you. I don't have a brain
any more. Just a sponge full of milk.
169
00:09:30,053 --> 00:09:32,170
- Sheila?
(DRUSCILLA) Sam...
170
00:09:32,293 --> 00:09:33,773
If you've got a problem,
171
00:09:33,893 --> 00:09:36,044
it's about you.
172
00:09:36,973 --> 00:09:39,044
It's not about anybody else.
It's about you.
173
00:09:39,173 --> 00:09:42,007
You have got to get
out of your own way.
174
00:09:42,693 --> 00:09:46,084
I keep starting to write scripts
and then I just get blocked.
175
00:09:46,213 --> 00:09:48,682
Lucy says I have to draw it
from my deep inner self.
176
00:09:48,813 --> 00:09:51,203
Although she knows perfectly well
I haven't got one.
177
00:09:51,333 --> 00:09:53,404
(TREVOR) Just write
about what you know.
178
00:09:53,533 --> 00:09:55,047
You see, I don't know anything.
179
00:09:55,173 --> 00:09:56,846
Write about what you feel.
180
00:09:56,973 --> 00:09:58,612
I don't feel anything.
181
00:09:58,733 --> 00:10:00,611
(GEORGE) You're buggered then, mate.
182
00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:03,453
they say writer's block
is God's way of telling you
183
00:10:03,573 --> 00:10:05,132
that you're not a writer.
184
00:10:05,253 --> 00:10:06,767
(LAUGHTER)
185
00:10:06,893 --> 00:10:08,964
(MELINDA) Don't listen to him, Sam.
186
00:10:09,093 --> 00:10:11,289
I'm serious, Luce, I'm serious.
187
00:10:11,413 --> 00:10:13,769
Western society is the only society
188
00:10:13,893 --> 00:10:16,692
that has dispensed
with all its fertility rituals...
189
00:10:16,813 --> 00:10:18,372
- Here we go.
- No, no, no, no.
190
00:10:18,493 --> 00:10:20,883
And the only society where birth
rates are plummeting.
191
00:10:21,013 --> 00:10:25,326
Hello? Hello, everybody!
Obvious connection alert!
192
00:10:25,453 --> 00:10:27,729
What we have to do is to harness...
193
00:10:27,853 --> 00:10:30,527
- Listen. It's very important.
- I'm listening.
194
00:10:30,653 --> 00:10:34,772
Harness the ancient power
and mystery of your vagina.
195
00:10:34,893 --> 00:10:36,293
- Get off, get off!
- Yes!
196
00:10:36,413 --> 00:10:39,850
the air is full of pagan spirits.
197
00:10:41,893 --> 00:10:43,373
they're all around.
198
00:10:43,493 --> 00:10:46,531
You might as well use them,
for God's sake, they're there.
199
00:10:46,653 --> 00:10:48,133
Womb!
200
00:10:48,253 --> 00:10:49,573
Womb!
201
00:10:49,693 --> 00:10:52,083
Womb! Stop laughing. Flow...
202
00:10:53,613 --> 00:10:55,969
It might have worked.
You never know.
203
00:10:56,093 --> 00:10:58,927
I can't afford to leave
any avenue unexplored.
204
00:10:59,053 --> 00:11:02,444
Druscilla says there's a ton
of alternative therapies available.
205
00:11:02,573 --> 00:11:04,610
Um, visualisation classes,
206
00:11:04,733 --> 00:11:06,452
aromatherapeutic massages.
207
00:11:06,573 --> 00:11:08,530
Apparently, a lot of people
have conceived
208
00:11:08,653 --> 00:11:10,770
having gone to that giant chalk man
in Dorset
209
00:11:10,893 --> 00:11:12,247
and having it off on his willy.
210
00:11:12,373 --> 00:11:15,332
Dorset? there aren't any giant
chalk men closer to London?
211
00:11:15,453 --> 00:11:16,728
Like Brent Cross?
212
00:11:16,853 --> 00:11:20,449
No. But there are some very positive
ley lines in Primrose Hill.
213
00:11:20,573 --> 00:11:23,247
Lucy, can I just clear up
one small point here?
214
00:11:23,373 --> 00:11:27,606
You wouldn't, by any chance,
be going completely barking mad?
215
00:11:28,493 --> 00:11:29,893
Would you?
216
00:11:33,618 --> 00:11:36,372
Carl, may I say
how very happy and thrilled we are
217
00:11:36,498 --> 00:11:38,217
that you're joining this agency.
218
00:11:38,338 --> 00:11:39,613
thank you, Sheila.
219
00:11:39,738 --> 00:11:44,130
to be frank, ever since this whole
stupid celebrity thing happened,
220
00:11:44,258 --> 00:11:47,854
I've felt more like a commodity,
really, than an actor.
221
00:11:47,978 --> 00:11:50,447
You know, I want work
that stretches me,
222
00:11:50,578 --> 00:11:52,297
challenges me, you know?
223
00:11:52,418 --> 00:11:55,013
Well, the Welsh Language
Shakespeare Company
224
00:11:55,138 --> 00:11:57,892
are looking for a friendly
and enthusiastic Bottom.
225
00:11:58,018 --> 00:11:59,930
I imagine that would be
quite challenging.
226
00:12:00,058 --> 00:12:04,291
Yeah. I should also add that I want
work that pays fabulously well,
227
00:12:04,418 --> 00:12:07,138
keeps me in London and is,
above all, in English.
228
00:12:07,258 --> 00:12:08,738
(LAUGHTER)
229
00:12:08,858 --> 00:12:12,295
Ou en Français, or in Italiano.
230
00:12:12,418 --> 00:12:14,137
(SHEILA) Well, Carl...
231
00:12:14,258 --> 00:12:15,658
Benvenuto.
232
00:12:23,978 --> 00:12:27,130
(SAM) I can't believe full
evening dress is necessary.
233
00:12:27,258 --> 00:12:28,977
We look like Gomez and Morticia.
234
00:12:29,098 --> 00:12:30,418
(LUCY) Who cares?
235
00:12:30,538 --> 00:12:33,451
Druscilla says we must
be throbbingly,
236
00:12:33,578 --> 00:12:36,093
primevally sexually charged.
237
00:12:36,218 --> 00:12:38,449
timeless animals of passion.
238
00:12:39,298 --> 00:12:42,336
Urgh! Oh, my God!
239
00:12:42,458 --> 00:12:43,812
What?
240
00:12:43,938 --> 00:12:49,138
I have just trodden in the biggest
dog turd that I've ever seen.
241
00:12:49,538 --> 00:12:50,892
Sam!
242
00:12:51,018 --> 00:12:54,216
No, seriously. No mortal dog could
have passed a turd like that.
243
00:12:54,338 --> 00:12:56,694
- I almost went in up to my knee.
- Sam, shut up!
244
00:12:56,818 --> 00:12:59,731
I think an elephant must have
escaped from London Zoo.
245
00:13:01,298 --> 00:13:03,130
I never liked those shoes anyway.
246
00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:12,410
Oh, no!
247
00:13:21,258 --> 00:13:24,012
(LUCY) Oh, it's beautiful,
isn't it?
248
00:13:24,138 --> 00:13:25,811
(SAM) Yes, it is.
249
00:13:25,938 --> 00:13:28,498
Makes us seem pretty insignificant,
doesn't it?
250
00:13:28,618 --> 00:13:32,407
Except that what we've come here
to achieve tonight
251
00:13:32,538 --> 00:13:36,418
is as big as the universe itself.
252
00:13:38,498 --> 00:13:40,455
New life, Sam.
253
00:13:41,498 --> 00:13:45,412
I will rock you like a baby, lover
254
00:13:45,538 --> 00:13:47,734
Cradled in my arms
255
00:13:47,858 --> 00:13:51,454
I will keep you safe from danger
256
00:13:51,578 --> 00:13:54,332
Shelter you from harm
257
00:13:54,458 --> 00:13:58,054
there will never be another lover
258
00:13:58,178 --> 00:14:00,534
treat you like I do
259
00:14:00,658 --> 00:14:03,810
You can drift into forever
260
00:14:03,938 --> 00:14:06,931
On a love that's made for two
261
00:14:07,058 --> 00:14:09,129
Don't you ever say
262
00:14:09,258 --> 00:14:12,535
this love's not special...
263
00:14:12,658 --> 00:14:14,809
that was beautiful.
264
00:14:16,498 --> 00:14:18,569
A bit hard on the knees, I thought.
265
00:14:19,258 --> 00:14:22,092
It reminds me of a scene
we've been doing on my course
266
00:14:22,218 --> 00:14:24,175
from a Midsummer Night's Dream.
267
00:14:25,578 --> 00:14:28,730
I don't recall anyone having it off
on a ley line.
268
00:14:28,858 --> 00:14:30,690
I just mean the magic.
269
00:14:30,818 --> 00:14:33,333
Where Hermia and Lysander
lie down together
270
00:14:33,458 --> 00:14:35,415
to sleep in the enchanted wood.
271
00:14:35,538 --> 00:14:37,211
You know the bit?
272
00:14:37,338 --> 00:14:38,772
Mmm. Rings a vague bell.
273
00:14:38,898 --> 00:14:43,575
I remember you used to read me
sonnets when we were first together.
274
00:14:43,698 --> 00:14:46,657
Ah, I was trying to impress you
with my poetic soul.
275
00:14:46,778 --> 00:14:49,054
Can't see you falling
for that any more. Come on.
276
00:14:49,178 --> 00:14:52,410
Pull your knickers up, you old tart,
before we get arrested.
277
00:14:59,458 --> 00:15:02,018
television is all very well,
278
00:15:02,138 --> 00:15:04,255
but movies are the Millennial
art form,
279
00:15:04,378 --> 00:15:06,290
and British movies
have never been hipper.
280
00:15:06,418 --> 00:15:09,729
there were at least three last year
the Americans quite liked.
281
00:15:09,858 --> 00:15:13,249
So where do you think
I'm going with this? Anyone?
282
00:15:13,378 --> 00:15:16,337
- Anyone?
- We should be making more movies.
283
00:15:16,458 --> 00:15:19,292
thank you, George. Exactly.
284
00:15:19,418 --> 00:15:21,171
Scripts. I need scripts.
285
00:15:21,298 --> 00:15:23,972
Witty, thrilling, provocative scripts.
286
00:15:24,098 --> 00:15:26,852
Scripts that define the Zeitgeist.
287
00:15:26,978 --> 00:15:28,492
With me!
288
00:15:30,258 --> 00:15:32,295
thank you, George.
289
00:15:32,418 --> 00:15:34,375
(LUCY) Come on! Come on!
290
00:15:34,498 --> 00:15:37,138
the traffic light's green.
My temperature's optimum.
291
00:15:37,258 --> 00:15:38,612
Hi.
292
00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:41,173
Sorry. I hope I didn't interrupt
anything.
293
00:15:41,298 --> 00:15:42,857
No, no. Not really.
294
00:15:44,538 --> 00:15:47,053
- Well, we better get on with it.
- Right.
295
00:15:51,938 --> 00:15:53,657
Where's it gone?
296
00:15:54,578 --> 00:15:58,015
Um... Well, I expect
it'll be along in a minute.
297
00:15:58,138 --> 00:15:59,731
Got to get in the mood.
298
00:16:06,058 --> 00:16:07,412
Anything yet?
299
00:16:07,538 --> 00:16:10,212
Well, don't ask that.
It'll never happen if you ask.
300
00:16:10,338 --> 00:16:11,692
It's not like you.
301
00:16:11,818 --> 00:16:14,890
this morning you had a horn
you could hang a bath towel on.
302
00:16:15,018 --> 00:16:17,533
Well, any man can get one
when he doesn't want one.
303
00:16:17,658 --> 00:16:20,776
I've seen harder knobs
on the door of a bouncy castle.
304
00:16:20,898 --> 00:16:22,696
thank you. that was helpful.
305
00:16:22,818 --> 00:16:25,492
Perhaps I should breathe
a bit of life into it?
306
00:16:25,618 --> 00:16:27,018
Would you mind awfully?
307
00:16:27,138 --> 00:16:28,811
No, no. Not at all.
308
00:16:35,298 --> 00:16:36,971
Well done, stud muffin.
309
00:16:37,098 --> 00:16:38,691
Well, I think honour was served.
310
00:16:39,578 --> 00:16:41,695
Do you really have to lie like that?
311
00:16:41,818 --> 00:16:44,538
I resent the implication
that my sperm will only make it
312
00:16:44,658 --> 00:16:46,536
if allowed to swim downhill.
313
00:16:46,658 --> 00:16:48,536
Got to make every effort.
314
00:16:48,658 --> 00:16:51,173
Oh, do you really have to rush off?
315
00:16:51,298 --> 00:16:53,130
Darling, I do have a job, you know.
316
00:16:53,258 --> 00:16:55,932
I am one of the BBC's
most senior lunch eaters.
317
00:16:56,058 --> 00:16:57,970
It just seems so mechanical.
318
00:16:58,098 --> 00:17:02,012
Druscilla says that gentle massage
promotes fertility.
319
00:17:02,138 --> 00:17:03,458
Mmm.
320
00:17:03,578 --> 00:17:06,377
Druscilla is, of course,
an insane witch. Socks?
321
00:17:06,978 --> 00:17:10,415
I just think it would be nice
to have more mystery and romance
322
00:17:10,538 --> 00:17:11,892
in our lives.
323
00:17:12,018 --> 00:17:14,249
Absolutely. Mystery.
Ah, there it is.
324
00:17:20,068 --> 00:17:21,468
Sam Bell. How are you?
325
00:17:21,588 --> 00:17:23,068
- Petra.
- Nice to meet you.
326
00:17:23,188 --> 00:17:25,020
- Ewan.
- Oh, right, thanks.
327
00:17:26,308 --> 00:17:30,268
Sam, if the BBC are serious
about making comedy films,
328
00:17:30,388 --> 00:17:34,177
then Kiss My Ark are the production
company you have to be in bed with.
329
00:17:34,308 --> 00:17:37,506
two words, Sam. Zeit and geist.
330
00:17:37,628 --> 00:17:39,460
tomorrow's comedy...today.
331
00:17:39,588 --> 00:17:42,660
Excellent. that's certainly
what the new controller wants.
332
00:17:45,428 --> 00:17:48,739
(SCOTTISH ACCENT)
Sick Junkie is a comedy
333
00:17:48,948 --> 00:17:51,668
about a group
of normal, ordinary kids.
334
00:17:51,788 --> 00:17:53,745
All heroin addicts, of course.
335
00:17:53,868 --> 00:17:57,339
Possibly Welsh, maybe Irish,
probably Scottish.
336
00:17:58,388 --> 00:18:02,621
We see a week in their ordinary
mundane lives.
337
00:18:02,748 --> 00:18:05,707
they inject heroin
into their eyeballs.
338
00:18:05,828 --> 00:18:07,706
they have babies in toilets.
339
00:18:07,828 --> 00:18:09,308
they get Aids.
340
00:18:09,428 --> 00:18:11,863
they try and raise veins
on their private parts
341
00:18:11,988 --> 00:18:13,866
in order to inject more heroin.
342
00:18:13,988 --> 00:18:16,184
they kill a social worker.
343
00:18:16,308 --> 00:18:19,301
they have anal sex
in exchange for heroin,
344
00:18:19,428 --> 00:18:22,739
which turns out to be cut
with bleach, and kills them.
345
00:18:22,868 --> 00:18:24,746
they have abortions.
346
00:18:24,868 --> 00:18:27,383
they're raped by gangs
of English policemen.
347
00:18:27,508 --> 00:18:30,979
Excuse me. I just want to make sure
I'm following this.
348
00:18:31,108 --> 00:18:33,339
this is a comedy we're discussing,
is it?
349
00:18:33,468 --> 00:18:35,380
It's total comedy,
350
00:18:35,508 --> 00:18:37,420
but real comedy
351
00:18:37,548 --> 00:18:40,382
about what's actually happening
to kids today.
352
00:18:40,508 --> 00:18:43,387
Not escapist English crap.
353
00:18:44,348 --> 00:18:45,668
thank you.
354
00:18:46,428 --> 00:18:47,987
Well, um...
355
00:18:48,108 --> 00:18:50,418
It's not that I don't like it, Ewan...
356
00:18:51,228 --> 00:18:52,503
No, no.
357
00:18:53,948 --> 00:18:57,020
Hate it, I think
would be nearer the mark.
358
00:18:57,148 --> 00:18:58,502
Hate is good.
359
00:18:58,628 --> 00:19:00,779
- Not in this case.
- Meaning?
360
00:19:03,068 --> 00:19:07,108
Well, I don't see it
as the BBC's job to fund
361
00:19:07,228 --> 00:19:09,982
cynical tales about drugs
and prostitution,
362
00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:12,828
which purport to reflect
everyday life in Britain
363
00:19:12,948 --> 00:19:16,783
just so that fashion junkies who
make them can swank about at Cannes
364
00:19:16,908 --> 00:19:19,377
and then bugger off to the States
the first chance they get.
365
00:19:22,708 --> 00:19:23,983
Hey...
366
00:19:24,108 --> 00:19:26,100
Bollocks to the English bullshit.
367
00:19:26,228 --> 00:19:28,538
Do you want the picture
or don't you?
368
00:19:32,668 --> 00:19:34,785
I'll be in touch.
369
00:19:34,908 --> 00:19:39,266
I do wish Sam could be just
a little more romantic sometimes.
370
00:19:39,388 --> 00:19:43,064
I mean, I'm not asking him
to turn into a Carl Phipps figure.
371
00:19:43,188 --> 00:19:45,544
Not that I find Carl Phipps attractive,
372
00:19:45,668 --> 00:19:47,705
although he does have a nice smile
373
00:19:47,828 --> 00:19:51,708
when he deigns to bestow it
on someone as lowly as myself.
374
00:19:52,868 --> 00:19:54,939
You're looking a bit gorgeous today,
Lucy,
375
00:19:55,068 --> 00:19:56,821
if you don't mind me saying so.
376
00:19:56,948 --> 00:19:59,304
Which was simply not true.
377
00:19:59,428 --> 00:20:02,227
All I had on was
this silly little short skirt
378
00:20:02,348 --> 00:20:04,499
and that tight little top
I quite like,
379
00:20:04,628 --> 00:20:06,347
and, frankly, I looked awful,
380
00:20:06,468 --> 00:20:08,585
so it was stupid of him
to pretend that I didn't.
381
00:20:11,828 --> 00:20:13,547
Did you want this massage,
then?
382
00:20:17,308 --> 00:20:19,220
Rose and geranium are oestrogenic.
383
00:20:19,348 --> 00:20:22,182
they're meant to be massaged gently
but forcefully
384
00:20:22,308 --> 00:20:24,459
into the lower back
and cleft of the bottom.
385
00:20:24,588 --> 00:20:25,908
Fine.
386
00:20:26,028 --> 00:20:29,146
try and be a bit more sensitive.
I'm not a piece of dough.
387
00:20:29,268 --> 00:20:31,419
Sorry. A bit preoccupied.
388
00:20:32,988 --> 00:20:34,900
You used to like my bottom.
389
00:20:35,668 --> 00:20:38,706
It's got nothing to do with whether
I like your bottom or not.
390
00:20:38,828 --> 00:20:40,547
I've just got things on my mind.
391
00:20:40,668 --> 00:20:42,068
So you don't like my bottom?
392
00:20:42,188 --> 00:20:44,339
Of course I like your bottom.
393
00:20:44,828 --> 00:20:46,945
I bet you'd be more than happy
394
00:20:47,068 --> 00:20:49,947
to massage aromatic oils
into Cameron Diaz's bottom.
395
00:20:50,988 --> 00:20:53,344
Possibly I would,
in an abstract sense.
396
00:20:53,468 --> 00:20:56,028
Well, go on, then.
I am not stopping you.
397
00:20:56,148 --> 00:21:01,143
Lucy, I have no plans to massage
oil into Cameron Diaz's bottom.
398
00:21:01,268 --> 00:21:02,861
But you do find her attractive?
399
00:21:02,988 --> 00:21:05,298
It's irrelevant whether I do
or I don't.
400
00:21:05,428 --> 00:21:07,226
A man finding other women attractive
401
00:21:07,348 --> 00:21:09,067
is not the same as being unfaithful.
402
00:21:09,188 --> 00:21:11,657
So what you're saying is
you want to screw other women?
403
00:21:11,788 --> 00:21:13,108
No.
404
00:21:13,228 --> 00:21:16,778
Lucy, look. All men
find other women attractive.
405
00:21:16,908 --> 00:21:20,822
the fact they remain faithful is
the proof of their love and devotion.
406
00:21:20,948 --> 00:21:23,702
Well, if you're that desperate,
go on, then.
407
00:21:23,828 --> 00:21:25,740
I am not stopping you.
408
00:21:28,548 --> 00:21:29,868
What?
409
00:21:29,988 --> 00:21:34,619
I'm booking tickets for "Love's
Labour's Lost" at the Barbican.
410
00:21:34,748 --> 00:21:36,307
that's nice.
411
00:21:37,268 --> 00:21:40,261
Since you ask, I have to write
an essay on the difference
412
00:21:40,388 --> 00:21:43,028
between Shakespeare on the page
and on the stage.
413
00:21:44,108 --> 00:21:46,304
My God, you do this voluntarily?
414
00:21:47,468 --> 00:21:49,505
So I take it you don't want
a ticket?
415
00:21:49,628 --> 00:21:51,745
Not while there's wet paint
left in Britain
416
00:21:51,868 --> 00:21:53,302
that I can sit and watch dry.
417
00:21:57,628 --> 00:21:59,028
Sam.
418
00:22:01,148 --> 00:22:03,060
I've been wanting to talk about...
419
00:22:03,188 --> 00:22:07,102
you know, trying for a baby
and our sex life.
420
00:22:08,228 --> 00:22:11,619
I thought they were pretty much
one and the same thing these days.
421
00:22:11,748 --> 00:22:13,546
Not that I mind or anything.
422
00:22:14,988 --> 00:22:17,059
Sam, we've got a problem here.
423
00:22:17,188 --> 00:22:19,180
It's time we saw a doctor.
424
00:22:21,508 --> 00:22:24,945
Well, I don't know. that's
a pretty big step psychologically.
425
00:22:25,068 --> 00:22:27,788
I mean, now we can see ourselves
as being unlucky,
426
00:22:27,908 --> 00:22:29,183
but if we go and see a doctor,
427
00:22:29,308 --> 00:22:31,504
we're admitting
that we might be infertile.
428
00:22:33,108 --> 00:22:35,862
Sam...we are infertile.
429
00:22:42,998 --> 00:22:44,910
I'm warming to him.
430
00:22:45,038 --> 00:22:48,475
Did I tell you that I have to have
a sperm test?
431
00:22:48,598 --> 00:22:51,432
No, and actually
I'd rather you didn't.
432
00:22:51,558 --> 00:22:54,756
I don't see how you can be
squeamish on the subject, George.
433
00:22:54,878 --> 00:22:56,198
You produced Cuthbert.
434
00:22:56,318 --> 00:22:58,355
I wouldn't like to meet
the sperm that fathered him.
435
00:22:58,478 --> 00:23:01,038
Sam, sperm is like flatulence -
436
00:23:01,158 --> 00:23:03,389
it's different when it's your own.
437
00:23:06,398 --> 00:23:07,957
What if I fail?
438
00:23:08,078 --> 00:23:10,752
It's a sad moment when a man
has to face the possibility
439
00:23:10,878 --> 00:23:12,756
that there may not be lumps
in the custard.
440
00:23:12,878 --> 00:23:14,278
You wanker!
441
00:23:14,838 --> 00:23:16,192
How did you know?
442
00:23:16,318 --> 00:23:18,310
I've just heard from Justin
at Kiss My Ark
443
00:23:18,438 --> 00:23:20,077
that you dissed Ewan Proclaimer.
444
00:23:20,198 --> 00:23:22,838
- Dissed?
- You arrogant arse.
445
00:23:22,958 --> 00:23:25,393
Ewan Proclaimer
is at the cutting edge.
446
00:23:26,158 --> 00:23:30,118
And he's a God-sent antidote to the
rubbish your department commissions.
447
00:23:30,238 --> 00:23:33,197
- Yes. that's what he said.
- Why the hell did you diss him?
448
00:23:33,318 --> 00:23:37,278
I "dissed" him because I thought
his idea was crap, that's all.
449
00:23:37,398 --> 00:23:40,914
I took a dissing decision and faxed
him accordingly. that is my job.
450
00:23:41,038 --> 00:23:44,031
Oh, yes, it's your job.
Yeah. For the moment.
451
00:23:45,118 --> 00:23:47,587
You know what your trouble is?
You're jealous.
452
00:23:47,718 --> 00:23:49,789
Where's your script, eh?
453
00:23:49,918 --> 00:23:52,956
Where's the great Sam Bell's
masterpiece?
454
00:23:53,078 --> 00:23:54,432
Nowhere, mate.
455
00:23:54,558 --> 00:23:57,278
Which is where you are
and where you're going.
456
00:24:04,598 --> 00:24:07,636
Oh, I've made such a mess of things
at work.
457
00:24:08,958 --> 00:24:10,711
I think I might even lose my job.
458
00:24:10,838 --> 00:24:12,272
Oh, dear.
459
00:24:13,398 --> 00:24:15,629
Well, who knows,
it could be a good thing.
460
00:24:15,758 --> 00:24:18,910
Perhaps you should look on it
as an opportunity.
461
00:24:19,038 --> 00:24:21,837
Your chance to do
what you really want to do.
462
00:24:21,958 --> 00:24:23,950
What I want to do is start writing.
463
00:24:24,078 --> 00:24:25,398
Exactly.
464
00:24:25,518 --> 00:24:27,316
I don't know what to write about.
465
00:24:27,438 --> 00:24:29,430
- Aagh!
- Oh, hey. You all right?
466
00:24:29,558 --> 00:24:31,072
You OK?
467
00:24:31,198 --> 00:24:33,110
- What happened?
- I fell off my bike.
468
00:24:33,238 --> 00:24:34,513
Bad luck.
469
00:24:34,638 --> 00:24:37,870
Don't touch my child. I'm sorry.
I don't want you touching my child.
470
00:24:37,998 --> 00:24:41,787
Don't be so bloody paranoid!
He was only trying to help.
471
00:24:46,038 --> 00:24:47,313
Blimey.
472
00:24:47,438 --> 00:24:49,191
Well, really!
473
00:24:49,318 --> 00:24:50,672
Some people!
474
00:24:50,798 --> 00:24:52,517
they think their precious kids
475
00:24:52,638 --> 00:24:54,869
are at the centre
of the whole bloody universe.
476
00:24:54,998 --> 00:24:56,591
I wouldn't be like that.
477
00:24:56,718 --> 00:24:57,993
Mmm.
478
00:24:59,118 --> 00:25:00,632
Except, of course, you would.
479
00:25:00,758 --> 00:25:03,034
Yes. I probably would.
480
00:25:09,758 --> 00:25:11,954
If I ever got the chance to be.
481
00:25:17,318 --> 00:25:19,913
Oh, my God, that's it.
482
00:25:20,038 --> 00:25:21,836
What?
483
00:25:23,198 --> 00:25:25,508
the idea. the thing
I should write about.
484
00:25:25,638 --> 00:25:27,709
- What is?
- I should write about us.
485
00:25:27,838 --> 00:25:31,115
I should write a comedy
about an infertile couple.
486
00:25:31,638 --> 00:25:33,436
It's so obvious.
487
00:25:33,558 --> 00:25:35,550
A real modern tragi-comedy about...
488
00:25:36,438 --> 00:25:38,828
about life and the absence of life.
489
00:25:38,958 --> 00:25:41,189
And with jokes, too,
but proper jokes.
490
00:25:41,318 --> 00:25:42,877
Sad jokes, which are the best kind,
491
00:25:42,998 --> 00:25:46,469
about sperm tests
and guided fantasy sessions.
492
00:25:46,598 --> 00:25:50,035
Just imagine it. the disintegration
of this couple's sex life.
493
00:25:50,158 --> 00:25:53,788
With the woman starting to think
about nothing but fertility,
494
00:25:53,918 --> 00:25:55,796
and going all teary
over baby clothes.
495
00:25:55,918 --> 00:25:57,591
Sam, don't, please.
496
00:25:58,678 --> 00:25:59,998
You don't like it?
497
00:26:00,118 --> 00:26:02,758
Sam, how could you even think of it?
498
00:26:04,398 --> 00:26:05,673
No.
499
00:26:05,798 --> 00:26:08,393
No, you're right.
It's a stupid idea.
500
00:26:08,518 --> 00:26:11,511
I mean, I'm sorry,
but I just couldn't bear it.
501
00:26:11,638 --> 00:26:13,470
Well, why should you?
502
00:26:16,518 --> 00:26:19,033
Although you did tell me
to look within.
503
00:26:19,158 --> 00:26:21,912
Yes, but I didn't tell you to turn
our private tragedy
504
00:26:22,038 --> 00:26:23,870
into a national joke.
505
00:26:25,878 --> 00:26:27,631
No, that's right. You didn't.
506
00:26:33,212 --> 00:26:35,169
(SHEILA) Oh, Lucy, just the girl.
507
00:26:35,292 --> 00:26:37,966
Carl's wondering what to do
for the War Child Benefit.
508
00:26:38,092 --> 00:26:39,765
You're our Shakespeare scholar.
509
00:26:39,892 --> 00:26:41,167
Well, I...um...
510
00:26:41,292 --> 00:26:43,204
It can't be anything too gloomy.
511
00:26:43,332 --> 00:26:46,769
After all, if this concert is
about anything, it's about love.
512
00:26:46,892 --> 00:26:48,690
(SHEILA) And the show's
being televised,
513
00:26:48,812 --> 00:26:52,044
so he wants to look upbeat and sexy.
514
00:26:52,172 --> 00:26:53,572
Oh, do shut up, Sheila.
515
00:26:53,692 --> 00:26:56,571
Charity's fine, darling,
but you have a career.
516
00:26:57,132 --> 00:26:58,407
Lucy?
517
00:26:58,532 --> 00:27:00,125
Well...
518
00:27:00,252 --> 00:27:01,971
what about the eighteenth sonnet?
519
00:27:02,092 --> 00:27:05,051
I know it's a bit chocolate boxy,
520
00:27:05,172 --> 00:27:08,927
but I think it's the best love poem
ever written.
521
00:27:10,052 --> 00:27:13,124
I'm sorry. Which one is that?
522
00:27:14,212 --> 00:27:16,010
I'm sure you know it.
523
00:27:18,572 --> 00:27:21,212
"Shall I compare thee
to a summer's day?
524
00:27:21,332 --> 00:27:23,449
"thou art more lovely,
525
00:27:23,572 --> 00:27:25,370
"and more temperate.
526
00:27:27,132 --> 00:27:31,285
"Rough winds do shake
the darling buds of May and...
527
00:27:31,412 --> 00:27:34,803
"Summer's lease hath all too short
a date.
528
00:27:36,732 --> 00:27:38,371
"Sometime...
529
00:27:38,492 --> 00:27:41,371
"too hot the eye of heaven shines,
530
00:27:42,172 --> 00:27:45,290
"and often is his gold complexion...
531
00:27:45,412 --> 00:27:46,766
"dimm'd.
532
00:27:46,892 --> 00:27:50,488
"And every fair from fair
some time declines,
533
00:27:50,612 --> 00:27:52,012
"By chance,
534
00:27:52,132 --> 00:27:55,364
"or nature's changing course
untrimm'd."
535
00:27:55,492 --> 00:27:57,131
Oh.
536
00:27:58,932 --> 00:28:00,366
"But thy eternal summer
537
00:28:00,492 --> 00:28:02,609
"shall not fade,
538
00:28:03,532 --> 00:28:07,924
"nor lose possession
of that fair thou ow'st.
539
00:28:08,052 --> 00:28:12,365
"Nor shall Death brag
thou wand'rest in his shade,
540
00:28:12,492 --> 00:28:16,850
"when in eternal lines to time
thou grow'st."
541
00:28:16,972 --> 00:28:18,406
(PHONE RINGS)
542
00:28:18,532 --> 00:28:19,966
Wrong number.
543
00:28:20,092 --> 00:28:21,924
"So long as men can breathe
544
00:28:22,052 --> 00:28:24,089
"or eyes can see...
545
00:28:25,132 --> 00:28:26,930
"so long lives this,
546
00:28:27,052 --> 00:28:30,124
"and this gives life to thee."
547
00:28:34,492 --> 00:28:35,846
Well, Mr Phipps,
548
00:28:35,972 --> 00:28:38,851
you are in danger of turning me
back into a heterosexual.
549
00:28:40,252 --> 00:28:42,448
thank you for the tip, Lucy.
550
00:28:43,612 --> 00:28:45,205
You're so lovely...
551
00:28:46,532 --> 00:28:49,684
to be doing this, I mean,
for the orphans.
552
00:28:49,812 --> 00:28:51,565
Yeah.
553
00:28:54,372 --> 00:28:57,444
(BLUESY PIANO)
554
00:29:01,812 --> 00:29:03,769
Are you coming to bed?
555
00:29:04,812 --> 00:29:06,292
Er, yeah. In a while.
556
00:29:07,292 --> 00:29:09,284
Well, don't be up late.
557
00:29:09,412 --> 00:29:11,483
Early appointment tomorrow,
remember.
558
00:29:11,612 --> 00:29:12,966
How could I forget?
559
00:29:14,212 --> 00:29:17,091
Do you want me to help at all?
560
00:29:17,612 --> 00:29:19,490
Well, that's very kind, darling,
561
00:29:19,612 --> 00:29:22,844
but I think, bearing in mind
the seriousness of the situation,
562
00:29:22,972 --> 00:29:25,282
it's best to leave it to an expert.
563
00:29:25,412 --> 00:29:28,883
All right. But I want you
to think of me when you do it.
564
00:29:29,012 --> 00:29:31,243
Honestly! Women!
565
00:29:31,372 --> 00:29:33,648
You actually think that a man
can be unfaithful
566
00:29:33,772 --> 00:29:35,968
whilst indulging
in solitary masturbation.
567
00:29:36,092 --> 00:29:38,891
No. It's just I know you'll think
of Cameron Diaz.
568
00:29:39,012 --> 00:29:40,844
No, I won't.
569
00:29:40,972 --> 00:29:44,249
Although, you know,
some psychologists agree
570
00:29:44,372 --> 00:29:45,886
that a healthy fantasy life
571
00:29:46,012 --> 00:29:48,686
is an important part
of a monogamous relationship.
572
00:29:49,612 --> 00:29:51,922
I do not wish to discuss it
any further.
573
00:29:54,492 --> 00:29:57,644
Lucky she doesn't know I'm also
planning to invite Steffi Graf,
574
00:29:57,772 --> 00:30:00,082
the Corrs and Baby Spice
to the party.
575
00:30:01,292 --> 00:30:03,443
Sam...
576
00:30:03,572 --> 00:30:05,768
I'm very sorry about your film idea,
577
00:30:05,892 --> 00:30:08,566
- but you do understand, don't you?
- Oh, absolutely.
578
00:30:12,732 --> 00:30:15,008
Shall I take this to the bathroom?
579
00:30:15,132 --> 00:30:17,203
Yeah. thanks.
580
00:30:21,092 --> 00:30:24,722
(BLUES INTRODUCTION)
581
00:30:24,852 --> 00:30:28,402
I've got my sperm test tomorrow
582
00:30:29,332 --> 00:30:32,006
And my pot is on the shelf
583
00:30:35,332 --> 00:30:38,882
I've got my sperm test tomorrow
584
00:30:39,012 --> 00:30:41,607
And my little pot is on the shelf
585
00:30:45,612 --> 00:30:48,411
Gonna have to go into the bathroom
586
00:30:48,892 --> 00:30:52,602
Sit down and abuse myself.
587
00:30:57,652 --> 00:30:59,609
(THEY HOWL)
588
00:31:17,782 --> 00:31:19,978
Not as much as I'd hoped there'd be.
589
00:31:20,102 --> 00:31:21,616
Do you think you got it all?
590
00:31:21,742 --> 00:31:23,779
Yeah. Well...best I could.
591
00:31:23,902 --> 00:31:26,701
It's most disappointing.
It's like a sparrow sneezed.
592
00:31:26,822 --> 00:31:30,054
I thought I might eke it out
with a bit of flour and water,
593
00:31:30,182 --> 00:31:31,662
just for appearances.
594
00:31:31,782 --> 00:31:35,253
No? Oh, well.
I'd better get a move on.
595
00:31:35,382 --> 00:31:37,772
I've only got 50 minutes
to get it back to the clinic.
596
00:31:37,902 --> 00:31:40,815
Doctor Cooper said I should put it
in my pants to keep it warm.
597
00:31:40,942 --> 00:31:42,899
I hope I don't get hit by a car.
598
00:31:44,142 --> 00:31:45,622
Bye.
599
00:31:47,382 --> 00:31:48,782
taxi!
600
00:31:50,102 --> 00:31:51,661
- taxi!
- Whoa!
601
00:31:51,782 --> 00:31:53,899
I am in a hurry. I have
some important meetings.
602
00:31:54,022 --> 00:31:56,218
I've got some sperm up my arse
and it's dying.
603
00:31:58,582 --> 00:31:59,857
Oh!
604
00:32:04,902 --> 00:32:07,974
Hello. Sam Bell.
I'm here to make a delivery.
605
00:32:14,062 --> 00:32:15,462
It's funny how far...
606
00:32:15,582 --> 00:32:16,857
Oh, there we go.
607
00:32:23,422 --> 00:32:24,742
Morning.
608
00:32:25,662 --> 00:32:27,301
I mean, for heaven's sake!
609
00:32:27,422 --> 00:32:28,936
From what I can gather,
610
00:32:29,062 --> 00:32:32,419
as a younger man, he practically
had a degree in masturbation,
611
00:32:32,542 --> 00:32:34,898
and now he's acting
as if he's been sentenced
612
00:32:35,022 --> 00:32:37,901
to be hung by the scrotum
until dead.
613
00:32:38,022 --> 00:32:41,254
But Sam is being supportive?
614
00:32:41,382 --> 00:32:45,262
Well, I mean, he is attentive
to your emotional needs?
615
00:32:45,382 --> 00:32:48,932
Ah, yes. No. Absolutely.
He is wonderful, in his own way.
616
00:32:50,822 --> 00:32:52,256
Oh, my God! there's Carl Phipps!
617
00:32:52,382 --> 00:32:53,657
Where?
618
00:32:54,142 --> 00:32:55,417
Ow!
619
00:32:57,742 --> 00:33:00,576
Excuse me, miss, you seem
to have given me a dirty plate.
620
00:33:01,662 --> 00:33:03,779
Oh, silly me. It's my main course.
621
00:33:03,902 --> 00:33:08,419
Ho ho! So here's the bloody
cinematic genius
622
00:33:08,542 --> 00:33:11,979
who reckons me "tasteless, cynical
and exploitative".
623
00:33:12,742 --> 00:33:15,211
I take it you got my fax.
624
00:33:15,342 --> 00:33:17,095
George, this is Ewan Proclaimer.
625
00:33:17,222 --> 00:33:18,895
- Hi.
- Safe, bro.
626
00:33:19,022 --> 00:33:21,378
tell me something,
you uptight English bastard,
627
00:33:21,502 --> 00:33:23,494
when did you last write a script,
eh?
628
00:33:23,622 --> 00:33:25,579
Never. Am I right?
629
00:33:25,702 --> 00:33:27,056
And why?
630
00:33:27,182 --> 00:33:30,220
Because you're a talentless twat,
that's why.
631
00:33:30,342 --> 00:33:33,062
A leeching, lunch-eating parasite,
632
00:33:33,182 --> 00:33:37,142
who sits on his fat sweaty arse
all day at the taxpayers' expense,
633
00:33:37,262 --> 00:33:40,175
telling better men to bugger off.
634
00:33:40,822 --> 00:33:43,496
I don't think I've ever heard it
quite so well put, bro.
635
00:33:43,622 --> 00:33:46,899
Ewan, this Sick Junkie
I'm sure is a marvellous script...
636
00:33:47,022 --> 00:33:48,297
It's shite.
637
00:33:48,422 --> 00:33:49,742
I binned it.
638
00:33:49,862 --> 00:33:53,412
And what's more, I knew is was shite
before you told me it was shite.
639
00:33:53,542 --> 00:33:55,181
But let me tell you, pal...
640
00:33:55,302 --> 00:33:59,057
My shite shits on your shite
641
00:33:59,182 --> 00:34:01,902
'cause at least I write shite,
642
00:34:02,022 --> 00:34:05,618
whereas all you do is tell people
that do write shite
643
00:34:05,742 --> 00:34:08,541
that what they write is shite.
644
00:34:08,662 --> 00:34:10,813
So how sad are you?
645
00:34:12,382 --> 00:34:14,101
You little shite.
646
00:34:16,222 --> 00:34:17,861
It's all right. I'm going.
647
00:34:17,982 --> 00:34:20,019
I like him.
648
00:34:20,902 --> 00:34:23,736
Excellent mushroom Pithiviers,
by the way.
649
00:34:26,862 --> 00:34:28,182
You first.
650
00:34:28,302 --> 00:34:31,295
Oh, this is ridiculous.
It's like my A levels.
651
00:34:36,382 --> 00:34:38,453
Well, my blood test's OK.
652
00:34:38,582 --> 00:34:41,142
It seems that I ovulate.
653
00:34:41,262 --> 00:34:43,458
Well, that means
it's definitely me, then.
654
00:34:43,582 --> 00:34:45,539
I am a eunuch.
655
00:34:45,662 --> 00:34:48,018
You'd better do it. I can't.
656
00:34:52,382 --> 00:34:56,661
"Samuel Bell. Sperm test.
30% sluggish."
657
00:34:56,782 --> 00:34:58,262
Sluggish?
658
00:34:58,382 --> 00:35:00,260
Is that the word they use?
659
00:35:00,942 --> 00:35:03,855
Well, couldn't they have found
a nicer way of putting it?
660
00:35:03,982 --> 00:35:06,258
Like relaxed or unhurried?
661
00:35:06,382 --> 00:35:09,500
Relaxed, laid-back sperm
I could handle, but sluggish!
662
00:35:09,622 --> 00:35:10,897
"Motility poor."
663
00:35:11,022 --> 00:35:14,982
Oh, that is just an outrageous slur!
664
00:35:15,102 --> 00:35:17,571
"41% swimming
in the wrong direction."
665
00:35:17,702 --> 00:35:19,261
they're in a plastic pot!
666
00:35:19,382 --> 00:35:21,817
How are they supposed to know
the right direction?
667
00:35:21,942 --> 00:35:26,733
- "Conclusion..."
- I've got slack, stupid sperm!
668
00:35:26,862 --> 00:35:29,252
the stuff's been dawdling
back up my dick.
669
00:35:29,382 --> 00:35:32,580
Banging into each other,
getting their abnormal tails tangled.
670
00:35:32,702 --> 00:35:34,739
"Conclusion - normal."
671
00:35:34,862 --> 00:35:36,501
Normal?
672
00:35:36,622 --> 00:35:38,261
Yup. that's what it says.
673
00:35:38,382 --> 00:35:40,897
Seems that yours is no worse
than anyone else's.
674
00:35:41,022 --> 00:35:42,661
Yes!
675
00:35:42,782 --> 00:35:44,580
Oh, yes!
676
00:35:44,702 --> 00:35:46,421
Oh, result!
677
00:35:46,542 --> 00:35:48,693
One-nil. Passed his sperm test!
678
00:35:48,822 --> 00:35:52,259
Work to do but very pleasing result
this early on in the season.
679
00:36:04,868 --> 00:36:06,382
How about lunch?
680
00:36:08,348 --> 00:36:10,658
Carl Phipps came into work today,
681
00:36:10,788 --> 00:36:12,780
all brooding and Byronic.
682
00:36:12,908 --> 00:36:16,299
He looked like the dispossessed
lord of a bleak moorland estate.
683
00:36:16,428 --> 00:36:19,421
I swear his aftershave
smelt of heather.
684
00:36:20,228 --> 00:36:22,788
I stayed very cool.
685
00:36:22,908 --> 00:36:27,460
Well, that's a lovely thought, Carl,
but I'm on my own, you see?
686
00:36:27,588 --> 00:36:30,581
Sheila's bronchial -
self-diagnosed cure 40 fags a day!
687
00:36:30,708 --> 00:36:32,347
She had to go home,
688
00:36:32,468 --> 00:36:35,267
having coughed up something
that looked like it lived in a pond.
689
00:36:35,388 --> 00:36:38,108
And Joanna's in LA
with Trudi Hobson.
690
00:36:38,228 --> 00:36:40,902
You know Trudi? She's doing
some dreadful action film.
691
00:36:41,028 --> 00:36:43,224
It's a sequel and it's called...
692
00:36:43,348 --> 00:36:47,308
I don't know what it's called.
Shit two, I should imagine! So...
693
00:36:47,428 --> 00:36:51,945
Lucy. Lucy, everyone
is allowed a lunch break.
694
00:36:52,068 --> 00:36:54,299
Yeah. Yeah.
695
00:36:54,428 --> 00:36:56,738
Besides, I'm celebrating.
696
00:36:56,868 --> 00:36:59,383
Big American film. Got a recall.
697
00:37:00,348 --> 00:37:02,499
Oh...aromatic oils.
698
00:37:02,628 --> 00:37:04,859
I did a course in this, you know.
699
00:37:04,988 --> 00:37:08,220
therapeutic massage.
I'm qualified to practise.
700
00:37:08,348 --> 00:37:11,659
Shiatsu and, oh, reflexology, too.
701
00:37:13,348 --> 00:37:14,623
Oh...
702
00:37:14,748 --> 00:37:18,219
I just cannot get enough
of this alternative therapy.
703
00:37:19,908 --> 00:37:21,228
It's beautiful.
704
00:37:26,228 --> 00:37:28,788
Carl, this is really lovely,
705
00:37:28,908 --> 00:37:30,706
but if you're celebrating,
706
00:37:30,828 --> 00:37:33,980
shouldn't you be celebrating
with someone special?
707
00:37:34,668 --> 00:37:36,421
that's exactly what I am doing.
708
00:37:36,548 --> 00:37:40,827
Oh, my God! I could feel
that rash on my neck coming back.
709
00:37:40,948 --> 00:37:42,268
When I was a teenager,
710
00:37:42,388 --> 00:37:44,300
if ever a boy asked me out,
711
00:37:44,428 --> 00:37:48,388
I invariably, instantly looked
as if my throat had just been cut.
712
00:37:48,508 --> 00:37:50,818
What do you mean, Carl?
713
00:37:53,348 --> 00:37:55,146
I can't believe I'm writing this,
714
00:37:55,268 --> 00:37:58,102
but I think - in fact, I am sure -
715
00:37:58,228 --> 00:38:00,948
I felt his finger playing
in the palm of my hand,
716
00:38:01,068 --> 00:38:03,947
which, as far as I know,
is a silent code for,
717
00:38:04,068 --> 00:38:06,867
"I would not be adverse
to rogering you, ma'am."
718
00:38:17,068 --> 00:38:21,426
And another thing, why is it
that birds have such rude names?
719
00:38:21,548 --> 00:38:25,303
tit, cock, thrush. Whoo-hoo!
720
00:38:25,428 --> 00:38:27,420
Is he getting funnier,
721
00:38:27,548 --> 00:38:30,017
or have I finally lost
the will to resist?
722
00:38:30,148 --> 00:38:34,347
Lucy and I have to do
a post-coital compatibility test.
723
00:38:34,468 --> 00:38:36,187
Which means having it off,
724
00:38:36,308 --> 00:38:38,823
and then a doctor
looking at the aftermath.
725
00:38:40,548 --> 00:38:43,268
Why would you imagine
I would want to know that?
726
00:38:46,188 --> 00:38:48,498
(MUSIC: "PUMP It UP"
BY ELVIS COSTELLO)
727
00:38:48,628 --> 00:38:51,939
Pump it up, until you can feel it
728
00:38:52,068 --> 00:38:55,140
Pump it up, when you don't
really need it
729
00:39:01,588 --> 00:39:03,068
Pump it up
730
00:39:03,188 --> 00:39:05,066
Until you can feel it
731
00:39:05,188 --> 00:39:08,465
Pump it up,
till you don't really need it
732
00:39:09,948 --> 00:39:11,940
Don't really need it
733
00:39:12,988 --> 00:39:14,820
Don't really need it...
734
00:39:16,428 --> 00:39:17,748
Mrs Bell?
735
00:39:17,868 --> 00:39:19,348
Mr James will see you now.
736
00:39:27,558 --> 00:39:30,437
Mrs Bell, Mr Pooter
is a medical student.
737
00:39:30,558 --> 00:39:32,117
Would you object to him observing?
738
00:39:32,238 --> 00:39:33,911
No, there's nothing I like more
739
00:39:34,038 --> 00:39:36,394
than having a gormless
adolescent youth
740
00:39:36,518 --> 00:39:39,078
peering into my splayed vagina!
741
00:39:40,398 --> 00:39:42,276
No. Not at all.
742
00:39:43,878 --> 00:39:45,198
Good.
743
00:39:45,318 --> 00:39:47,674
Now, this, Pooter...
744
00:39:47,798 --> 00:39:49,949
we will not be requiring today.
745
00:39:50,078 --> 00:39:52,832
this could be useful later.
746
00:39:54,478 --> 00:39:56,470
And this is essential.
747
00:40:00,478 --> 00:40:03,710
You know, my moped saves me
17 minutes a day.
748
00:40:03,838 --> 00:40:06,751
Of course, I ride her damn hard.
749
00:40:30,958 --> 00:40:33,518
You see how the whole thing is...
750
00:40:33,638 --> 00:40:35,072
(MUMBLES)
751
00:40:41,278 --> 00:40:43,998
try to relax if you can,
please, Lucy.
752
00:40:44,118 --> 00:40:46,349
Shove a traffic cone
up your arse, mate,
753
00:40:46,478 --> 00:40:48,231
and see if you can relax.
754
00:40:48,358 --> 00:40:50,111
I will try.
755
00:40:50,238 --> 00:40:51,558
Good.
756
00:40:53,838 --> 00:40:55,636
there we are. All done.
757
00:40:55,758 --> 00:40:58,830
You'll be a bit slippery
in the downstairs department.
758
00:40:58,958 --> 00:41:00,392
It's the lubricant jelly.
759
00:41:00,518 --> 00:41:01,838
(LOUD SQUELCH)
760
00:41:04,038 --> 00:41:06,109
Don't be embarrassed. that was me.
761
00:41:22,998 --> 00:41:24,557
Children's TV?
762
00:41:25,718 --> 00:41:27,232
Yes. that's right.
763
00:41:27,358 --> 00:41:29,509
Kiddie telly.
764
00:41:29,638 --> 00:41:32,836
the Director General's
keen to sharpen up
765
00:41:32,958 --> 00:41:35,189
our light entertainment
in that area.
766
00:41:35,318 --> 00:41:39,278
So you want me out, but it's cheaper
to bury me in the daytime schedules.
767
00:41:39,398 --> 00:41:40,832
Yeah. that's right.
768
00:41:40,958 --> 00:41:42,756
(MOBILE PHONE RINGS)
769
00:41:46,078 --> 00:41:49,594
Hello? Melinda. It's rather a bad...
770
00:41:50,758 --> 00:41:52,590
Oh, no!
771
00:41:53,118 --> 00:41:55,917
Suspected meningitis.
772
00:41:56,038 --> 00:41:58,394
they won't know
for a couple of days.
773
00:42:00,318 --> 00:42:02,549
they can't tell at present.
774
00:42:03,758 --> 00:42:05,112
It's nice of you to come.
775
00:42:12,758 --> 00:42:15,068
Well, I was right.
I did lose my job.
776
00:42:16,318 --> 00:42:17,593
We won't starve though.
777
00:42:17,718 --> 00:42:20,108
they're moving me
into children's television.
778
00:42:20,238 --> 00:42:23,197
Sam, Melinda may be about
to lose her baby.
779
00:42:23,318 --> 00:42:25,833
I know. What do you
want me to do about it?
780
00:42:27,358 --> 00:42:28,633
Nothing.
781
00:42:29,758 --> 00:42:31,272
Nothing.
782
00:42:33,758 --> 00:42:35,351
Still, if we are infertile,
783
00:42:35,478 --> 00:42:38,198
at least we'll be spared
this kind of nightmare.
784
00:42:38,318 --> 00:42:41,117
Well, at least you can see
the bloody positive side.
785
00:42:41,238 --> 00:42:42,592
that's not...
786
00:42:46,558 --> 00:42:48,390
So how was it anyway?
787
00:42:50,238 --> 00:42:51,638
the test. How was it?
788
00:42:51,758 --> 00:42:53,954
Oh, that was fine. It was fine.
789
00:42:54,078 --> 00:42:57,628
Medically speaking,
it seems we're compatible.
790
00:43:05,598 --> 00:43:08,397
Oh, hi, Lucy.
Sheila and Joanna are just...
791
00:43:08,518 --> 00:43:09,998
You've been crying.
792
00:43:10,118 --> 00:43:11,438
What's wrong?
793
00:43:11,558 --> 00:43:13,914
I think my friend's baby's dying.
794
00:43:14,038 --> 00:43:16,075
they say he's got
suspected meningitis.
795
00:43:16,198 --> 00:43:18,508
Hey, hey, hey. Come and sit down.
796
00:43:23,398 --> 00:43:26,470
In the majority of cases
of suspected meningitis,
797
00:43:26,598 --> 00:43:28,590
it turns out to be just that -
798
00:43:28,718 --> 00:43:30,118
suspected.
799
00:43:30,238 --> 00:43:31,877
How do you know?
800
00:43:31,998 --> 00:43:35,833
I played a junior doctor
in a few episodes of Angel Nurse.
801
00:43:36,758 --> 00:43:40,832
the symptoms in these cases
are quite generalised
802
00:43:40,958 --> 00:43:43,348
and sometimes the real cause
of the problem's never known.
803
00:43:43,478 --> 00:43:45,310
the baby just gets over it.
804
00:43:46,438 --> 00:43:48,873
Babies are very tough, you know.
805
00:43:48,998 --> 00:43:50,318
Yeah.
806
00:43:50,438 --> 00:43:51,792
Very brave.
807
00:43:51,918 --> 00:43:53,830
Even though they don't look it.
808
00:44:09,238 --> 00:44:10,592
Carl, I...
809
00:44:12,398 --> 00:44:14,230
Lucy, I like you a lot.
810
00:44:15,318 --> 00:44:16,752
too much, I think.
811
00:44:16,878 --> 00:44:18,153
So...
812
00:44:19,038 --> 00:44:24,113
I'm going to try my hardest to keep
away from you from now on.
813
00:44:24,238 --> 00:44:25,877
It's best.
814
00:44:30,838 --> 00:44:32,113
Lucy...
815
00:44:32,238 --> 00:44:35,390
If you ever need someone to talk to,
you just...
816
00:44:36,558 --> 00:44:37,992
OK?
817
00:44:44,278 --> 00:44:46,873
Would you like a piece of cake,
Mrs Furblob?
818
00:44:46,998 --> 00:44:48,478
Yes, I would, Mr Furblob.
819
00:44:48,598 --> 00:44:50,829
Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy!
820
00:44:51,838 --> 00:44:55,548
I'm still not entirely happy
with the Furblob family
821
00:44:55,678 --> 00:44:58,910
perpetrating an exclusively
heterosexual lifestyle.
822
00:44:59,038 --> 00:45:01,712
What do you think, Sam?
You're the boss. It's your decision.
823
00:45:03,798 --> 00:45:05,278
Well...
824
00:45:05,398 --> 00:45:09,517
I think it's something we could
possibly raise in the focus group.
825
00:45:09,638 --> 00:45:11,436
Focus group?
826
00:45:13,798 --> 00:45:15,437
Right. Well...
827
00:45:15,558 --> 00:45:17,595
Hello. thanks for coming.
828
00:45:17,718 --> 00:45:21,997
today's BBC is all about you -
the viewer.
829
00:45:22,118 --> 00:45:23,950
You make us what we are.
830
00:45:24,078 --> 00:45:26,673
It's your BBC.
831
00:45:29,438 --> 00:45:31,509
So, er...
832
00:45:31,638 --> 00:45:33,118
Any comments?
833
00:45:36,918 --> 00:45:38,591
Anything at all?
834
00:45:41,078 --> 00:45:43,434
Right. Who else has had
a little accident?
835
00:45:51,518 --> 00:45:54,078
You see, they really like you.
836
00:46:30,523 --> 00:46:32,594
What are you doing up, Sam?
837
00:46:33,083 --> 00:46:34,995
What are you writing?
838
00:46:35,603 --> 00:46:39,074
Er... Er, nothing.
I just couldn't sleep and...
839
00:46:40,203 --> 00:46:43,082
- I thought I'd do my diary.
- Oh.
840
00:46:43,203 --> 00:46:45,843
You know, like you said.
Letters to myself.
841
00:46:45,963 --> 00:46:48,159
Can I read it?
842
00:46:48,283 --> 00:46:50,320
No, no. Absolutely not.
843
00:46:50,443 --> 00:46:53,242
Oh, don't worry.
I know, it's private.
844
00:46:53,363 --> 00:46:55,639
I'd die if you ever read mine.
845
00:46:55,763 --> 00:46:58,437
Mmm. I'm going back to bed.
846
00:47:23,323 --> 00:47:26,395
His temperature's dropped a bit
at last.
847
00:47:26,523 --> 00:47:28,082
Oh, that's great.
848
00:47:28,203 --> 00:47:31,082
Maybe this is just his way
of reminding me...
849
00:47:31,203 --> 00:47:34,241
that I can't live without him.
850
00:47:39,203 --> 00:47:42,037
Sam, this is fantastic.
851
00:47:42,163 --> 00:47:44,359
It's dark, it's dramatic...
852
00:47:44,483 --> 00:47:46,122
When did you write it all?
853
00:47:46,243 --> 00:47:47,882
You know me, Trevor,
it just pours out.
854
00:47:48,003 --> 00:47:49,801
I'm a frighteningly creative guy.
855
00:47:49,923 --> 00:47:51,801
Sorry I'm late.
Got caught up at the hospital.
856
00:47:51,923 --> 00:47:54,199
I spoke to Melinda. She said
Cuthbert's out of danger.
857
00:47:54,323 --> 00:47:57,236
Not from me. Little runt was sick
all over a Baumler suit.
858
00:47:57,363 --> 00:47:59,673
Sam, we've all had a look
at your pages.
859
00:47:59,803 --> 00:48:01,760
Everyone thinks they're marvellous.
860
00:48:01,883 --> 00:48:04,273
What I want to know is
how's Lucy taking it?
861
00:48:04,403 --> 00:48:06,474
I mean, it's all very intimate stuff.
862
00:48:06,603 --> 00:48:08,754
Like that bit when she props
her bum up on the pillows.
863
00:48:08,883 --> 00:48:10,602
I'm amazed she's letting you do it.
864
00:48:10,723 --> 00:48:12,203
She's not.
865
00:48:12,843 --> 00:48:15,278
- What do you mean she's not?
- She told me not to write it,
866
00:48:15,403 --> 00:48:17,281
but I'm going to do it anyway.
867
00:48:18,203 --> 00:48:20,001
She will kill you.
868
00:48:20,123 --> 00:48:23,400
I know. I know it's a bad thing,
but I couldn't help it.
869
00:48:23,523 --> 00:48:26,482
I'm stuck. I hated my last job,
I hate the job I've got now.
870
00:48:26,603 --> 00:48:28,834
- Have you seen the Furblobs?
- Cuthbert won't have them on.
871
00:48:28,963 --> 00:48:30,238
Exactly.
872
00:48:30,363 --> 00:48:33,515
Writing this is the first thing
I've felt positive about in years.
873
00:48:33,643 --> 00:48:36,363
Lucy will come round.
She'll understand.
874
00:48:37,483 --> 00:48:39,554
After all, it's my story, too,
isn't it?
875
00:48:42,603 --> 00:48:44,117
Another one?
876
00:48:44,243 --> 00:48:46,041
Well, I can't do it.
877
00:48:46,163 --> 00:48:49,122
You'll have to. the IVF people
need their own test.
878
00:48:49,243 --> 00:48:52,873
My God, Sam! It's not
the end of the world.
879
00:48:53,003 --> 00:48:56,201
I'm asking you to have a quick one
off the wrist, not shag a hedgehog.
880
00:48:56,323 --> 00:48:58,474
I have to have
a hystero-salpingogram.
881
00:48:58,603 --> 00:49:00,162
But I have to do it at the hospital.
882
00:49:00,283 --> 00:49:03,435
they want me to masturbate
inside a municipal facility.
883
00:49:03,563 --> 00:49:06,123
I simply cannot imagine
a more horrible prospect.
884
00:49:06,243 --> 00:49:09,395
Well, I can!
How about being stretched open,
885
00:49:09,523 --> 00:49:12,402
scraped out, stuffed full
of bits of cold metal,
886
00:49:12,523 --> 00:49:14,674
injected with dye,
pumped full of air,
887
00:49:14,803 --> 00:49:17,113
and, above all,
having every doctor in Britain
888
00:49:17,243 --> 00:49:21,078
staring up my twat
on a day to day basis?!
889
00:49:21,203 --> 00:49:24,275
Well, if you're going
to play the female card.
890
00:49:24,403 --> 00:49:25,917
Oooh.
891
00:49:33,603 --> 00:49:35,401
Do you think William's
got fleas again?
892
00:49:35,523 --> 00:49:38,163
I've noticed you scratching
a lot lately.
893
00:49:38,283 --> 00:49:41,276
I don't know what it is.
I seem to have these itchy patches.
894
00:49:41,403 --> 00:49:44,202
It's probably an allergic reaction
to something.
895
00:49:47,403 --> 00:49:50,043
All he seems to want to do
these days
896
00:49:50,163 --> 00:49:51,836
is to write in his diary.
897
00:49:52,043 --> 00:49:54,717
I know I should be glad that he's
trying to get in touch
898
00:49:54,843 --> 00:49:56,721
with his thoughts and feelings,
899
00:49:56,843 --> 00:49:59,278
but I do wish he'd share
some of them with me.
900
00:50:05,483 --> 00:50:08,317
Anyway, you've got very fascinated
all of a sudden.
901
00:50:08,443 --> 00:50:11,163
I'm just taking an interest,
you know.
902
00:50:12,083 --> 00:50:14,962
Didn't even know what
a laparoscopy was until now.
903
00:50:15,523 --> 00:50:16,798
Oh, bugger.
904
00:50:16,923 --> 00:50:18,198
What?
905
00:50:18,323 --> 00:50:20,235
I forgot to have my bikini line
done.
906
00:50:20,363 --> 00:50:22,036
Bikini line?
907
00:50:22,163 --> 00:50:23,995
Yes. I know it sounds
sort of stupid,
908
00:50:24,123 --> 00:50:27,036
but, believe it or not,
you want to look your best.
909
00:50:29,923 --> 00:50:31,994
that's very good. that's very funny.
910
00:50:32,123 --> 00:50:34,399
Sam, actually it's not
really very funny.
911
00:50:34,523 --> 00:50:37,675
the whole process
is totally dehumanising.
912
00:50:37,803 --> 00:50:39,442
Yeah. Right. Sorry.
913
00:50:39,563 --> 00:50:41,361
Your bed's ready now, Mrs Bell.
914
00:50:41,483 --> 00:50:43,156
Oh, right. thanks.
915
00:50:43,283 --> 00:50:44,603
Wish me luck.
916
00:50:44,723 --> 00:50:45,998
Good luck.
917
00:50:57,443 --> 00:50:59,912
Laparoscopy. Bikini wax.
918
00:51:00,043 --> 00:51:02,239
Want to look your best.
919
00:51:06,523 --> 00:51:08,754
You've got lovely guts.
920
00:51:08,883 --> 00:51:10,203
Beautiful.
921
00:51:10,323 --> 00:51:11,882
Really beautiful.
922
00:51:12,003 --> 00:51:14,472
Good big healthy bowel, too.
923
00:51:14,603 --> 00:51:17,914
Facilitates a really superb
movement, I should imagine.
924
00:51:18,043 --> 00:51:20,194
Big soft spongy stools?
925
00:51:20,323 --> 00:51:21,803
Well done.
926
00:51:21,923 --> 00:51:24,597
So what do we have here?
927
00:51:27,123 --> 00:51:29,638
Um... Endometriosis...
928
00:51:30,403 --> 00:51:32,634
adhesions on the abdominal cavity,
929
00:51:32,763 --> 00:51:34,959
malignant fibroids on the uterus,
930
00:51:35,083 --> 00:51:37,917
cysts, diseases
in the abdominal cavity,
931
00:51:38,043 --> 00:51:40,399
congenital problems in the womb...
932
00:51:40,523 --> 00:51:41,798
Oh, my God.
933
00:51:41,923 --> 00:51:43,642
And you haven't got any of them.
934
00:51:43,763 --> 00:51:46,119
Super guts. Really super.
935
00:51:47,443 --> 00:51:50,880
Also you've ovulated recently,
which is tremendous news.
936
00:51:51,003 --> 00:51:54,155
Can't make an omelette without eggs.
Hmm?
937
00:51:54,283 --> 00:51:58,994
And by omelette,
I mean, of course...baby.
938
00:52:00,123 --> 00:52:01,796
So there we have it, Lucy.
939
00:52:01,923 --> 00:52:03,960
Everything fine.
Nothing wrong at all.
940
00:52:05,523 --> 00:52:07,799
Except that I'm not pregnant.
941
00:52:07,923 --> 00:52:10,392
Apart, of course,
from you not being pregnant,
942
00:52:10,523 --> 00:52:13,118
but we don't know why you're not,
943
00:52:13,243 --> 00:52:15,758
which is, in itself,
tremendous news.
944
00:52:15,883 --> 00:52:17,556
Is it?
945
00:52:17,683 --> 00:52:20,357
Yeah. It could have been
that you had a cyst
946
00:52:20,483 --> 00:52:22,759
the size of Pavarotti on your ute,
947
00:52:22,883 --> 00:52:25,842
and I was going to have to remove
everything remotely feminine
948
00:52:25,963 --> 00:52:27,317
from your ribs to your kneecaps.
949
00:52:27,443 --> 00:52:30,720
But, no. You are what
is medically known
950
00:52:30,843 --> 00:52:33,483
as "non-specifically infertile".
951
00:52:33,603 --> 00:52:36,277
Or to give it its full
scientific description,
952
00:52:36,403 --> 00:52:39,316
we do not have a bloody clue.
953
00:52:39,443 --> 00:52:41,400
Very common condition.
954
00:52:41,523 --> 00:52:43,082
Very common indeed.
955
00:52:43,203 --> 00:52:46,560
In the world of infertility, that is.
956
00:52:50,310 --> 00:52:53,064
- too much? too mawkish?
- No, it's very good.
957
00:52:53,270 --> 00:52:54,989
It's very personal.
958
00:52:55,110 --> 00:52:57,944
Mmm. And it's going
to get more personal.
959
00:52:58,070 --> 00:53:00,460
You're dramatising your own life,
Sam.
960
00:53:00,590 --> 00:53:04,106
Yours and Lucy's. What's going
to happen when she finds out?
961
00:53:04,230 --> 00:53:06,267
Well, she probably never will,
will she?
962
00:53:06,390 --> 00:53:08,427
I mean, most movies never get made.
963
00:53:08,550 --> 00:53:10,143
If this goes into production...
964
00:53:11,110 --> 00:53:12,385
well, then I'll worry.
965
00:53:12,510 --> 00:53:15,742
But until then
it's just a mad dream,
966
00:53:15,870 --> 00:53:18,385
and we're all allowed to dream,
aren't we?
967
00:53:18,510 --> 00:53:19,990
Aren't we?
968
00:53:20,590 --> 00:53:22,661
(ORIENTAL MUSIC)
969
00:53:24,950 --> 00:53:26,384
It's open.
970
00:53:27,430 --> 00:53:29,547
- Hi...
- Ah-ah.
971
00:53:37,670 --> 00:53:39,024
Welcome.
972
00:53:39,950 --> 00:53:42,260
Hi. I brought the contracts.
973
00:53:42,390 --> 00:53:44,985
Sheila said you wanted me
to take you through them.
974
00:53:45,110 --> 00:53:47,864
Yeah. Yeah, that's what I told her.
975
00:53:48,910 --> 00:53:52,950
Well, you know, they're really
very standard and simple.
976
00:53:53,070 --> 00:53:54,789
they're very simple and basic.
977
00:53:54,910 --> 00:53:56,264
Very, very standard.
978
00:53:56,870 --> 00:53:58,702
I'm not interested in the contracts.
979
00:53:58,830 --> 00:54:01,390
But you said to Sheila that...
980
00:54:01,510 --> 00:54:03,581
I know what I said.
981
00:54:05,870 --> 00:54:07,589
What do you mean?
982
00:54:09,270 --> 00:54:11,501
I just wanted to be alone with you.
983
00:54:14,470 --> 00:54:16,109
Carl, I'm married.
984
00:54:16,870 --> 00:54:18,702
I love my husband.
985
00:54:18,830 --> 00:54:20,469
I think you're lonely.
986
00:54:21,670 --> 00:54:23,104
Not true.
987
00:54:23,230 --> 00:54:24,505
Yes, you are.
988
00:54:25,390 --> 00:54:26,665
And so am I.
989
00:54:26,790 --> 00:54:28,349
And...
990
00:54:30,190 --> 00:54:31,670
Lucy, I've tried...
991
00:54:31,790 --> 00:54:34,066
I've tried keeping away from you...
992
00:54:36,830 --> 00:54:38,150
but I can't.
993
00:54:40,750 --> 00:54:42,150
Don't...
994
00:54:42,270 --> 00:54:43,590
Please...
995
00:54:50,310 --> 00:54:52,142
Come to bed with me.
996
00:54:54,430 --> 00:54:56,023
I think I'm in love with you.
997
00:54:57,350 --> 00:54:59,069
You don't mean that.
998
00:54:59,190 --> 00:55:01,944
Yes... Yes, I do.
999
00:55:20,230 --> 00:55:21,664
Oh, I can't!
1000
00:55:21,790 --> 00:55:23,065
I can't!
1001
00:55:23,190 --> 00:55:26,342
You... You're wonderful.
You are beautiful.
1002
00:55:26,470 --> 00:55:30,350
But I love my husband!
And it's not exciting like this,
1003
00:55:30,470 --> 00:55:33,907
but then, nothing ever is exciting
forever, is it?
1004
00:55:34,030 --> 00:55:35,350
Isn't it?
1005
00:55:35,470 --> 00:55:38,383
that's a rather bleak view
to have of life.
1006
00:55:39,470 --> 00:55:41,507
I'm sorry, Carl,
but I've got to go now.
1007
00:55:41,630 --> 00:55:43,542
Will you call for a cab, please?
1008
00:55:44,710 --> 00:55:46,542
Yeah. Yeah, of course.
1009
00:55:46,670 --> 00:55:49,742
I am sorry, Carl, but...
1010
00:55:50,750 --> 00:55:52,469
I love my husband.
1011
00:55:56,520 --> 00:55:58,591
(BLUESY GUITAR)
1012
00:55:58,720 --> 00:56:00,677
I shan't see Carl again.
1013
00:56:00,800 --> 00:56:02,200
I mustn't.
1014
00:56:02,320 --> 00:56:04,277
I feel so guilty.
1015
00:56:05,760 --> 00:56:08,036
I don't want Carl.
1016
00:56:08,880 --> 00:56:10,439
I want Sam.
1017
00:56:10,560 --> 00:56:12,791
That's all I want.
1018
00:56:13,560 --> 00:56:15,870
And for us to have a baby.
1019
00:56:17,560 --> 00:56:19,392
Oh, God...
1020
00:56:19,520 --> 00:56:21,000
if you're reading this,
1021
00:56:21,120 --> 00:56:24,113
please make the IVF work.
1022
00:56:25,800 --> 00:56:28,554
I do want a baby so very much.
1023
00:56:42,920 --> 00:56:44,752
Just had something in my eye.
1024
00:56:44,880 --> 00:56:46,200
Right.
1025
00:56:53,200 --> 00:56:56,238
Sam, we wanted to talk
because there's a problem.
1026
00:56:56,360 --> 00:56:58,317
the script's too blokey.
1027
00:56:58,440 --> 00:56:59,715
Blokey?
1028
00:56:59,840 --> 00:57:01,433
Colin's stuff is brilliant -
1029
00:57:01,560 --> 00:57:03,279
the masturbation scene
is hilarious -
1030
00:57:03,400 --> 00:57:04,834
but Rachel is a worry.
1031
00:57:04,960 --> 00:57:07,191
Frankly, she's two-dimensional.
1032
00:57:07,320 --> 00:57:09,118
She's got some good lines,
1033
00:57:09,240 --> 00:57:12,119
but she's being drawn
from a male perspective.
1034
00:57:12,240 --> 00:57:14,072
Trevor and I have been thinking.
1035
00:57:14,200 --> 00:57:17,079
Why don't we bring in
a woman writer?
1036
00:57:18,360 --> 00:57:20,192
Are you out of your minds?
1037
00:57:21,440 --> 00:57:25,070
Yeah, all right. I admit that the
Rachel character needs some work,
1038
00:57:25,200 --> 00:57:26,475
but I'll get there.
1039
00:57:26,600 --> 00:57:28,956
this is my story. Mine and Lucy's.
1040
00:57:29,080 --> 00:57:30,992
- Exactly.
- Exactly.
1041
00:57:31,120 --> 00:57:33,794
- What does that mean?
- All this has got to come out soon.
1042
00:57:33,920 --> 00:57:37,277
If we bring in a female writer,
you can tell Lucy that it was her...
1043
00:57:37,400 --> 00:57:39,995
No one is taking my bloody script
away from me, George!
1044
00:57:40,120 --> 00:57:41,440
Do you understand?
1045
00:57:41,560 --> 00:57:43,677
All right. Wreck your marriage
if you like!
1046
00:57:44,920 --> 00:57:47,435
But we still need something done
about the female voice.
1047
00:57:47,560 --> 00:57:50,473
Well, leave that to me.
Was there anything else?
1048
00:57:51,960 --> 00:57:53,519
No? thank you.
1049
00:58:21,120 --> 00:58:23,032
Whatever the fates decide,
1050
00:58:23,160 --> 00:58:26,232
I intend to remain
an emotionally functional woman.
1051
00:58:26,360 --> 00:58:28,511
I'd read my child Beatrix Potter,
1052
00:58:28,640 --> 00:58:30,074
and Winnie the Pooh.
1053
00:58:30,200 --> 00:58:34,080
It is simply not possible to
change gear with your legs crossed.
1054
00:58:39,440 --> 00:58:42,319
I caught myself looking
at baby clothes again today.
1055
00:58:44,400 --> 00:58:47,632
Sometimes,
when it gets too much...
1056
00:58:50,960 --> 00:58:53,350
I must admit I pray.
1057
00:58:59,800 --> 00:59:01,359
Lucy, hi.
1058
00:59:02,560 --> 00:59:03,835
Hi.
1059
00:59:03,960 --> 00:59:05,394
Good bath?
1060
00:59:05,520 --> 00:59:07,193
Mmm-hmm.
1061
00:59:08,320 --> 00:59:09,640
Good.
1062
00:59:12,600 --> 00:59:13,920
Are you all right?
1063
00:59:14,040 --> 00:59:15,952
Am I...? Yeah. Fine.
1064
00:59:18,520 --> 00:59:21,115
Never had this dandruff before.
1065
00:59:23,720 --> 00:59:25,200
Psoriasis.
1066
00:59:25,320 --> 00:59:27,437
A dry, flaky skin condition.
1067
00:59:27,560 --> 00:59:28,880
No cure, I'm afraid.
1068
00:59:29,000 --> 00:59:30,514
It must be in your family.
1069
00:59:30,640 --> 00:59:33,030
It often strikes out of the blue
like this.
1070
00:59:33,160 --> 00:59:35,675
Normally the subject's
under unusual stress.
1071
00:59:35,800 --> 00:59:38,031
Is there anything stressful
on your mind?
1072
00:59:38,160 --> 00:59:39,514
No!
1073
00:59:39,640 --> 00:59:41,518
I mean, no, nothing.
1074
00:59:41,640 --> 00:59:43,438
Don't have a thing to worry about.
1075
00:59:45,960 --> 00:59:48,520
- Action!
- I want my freedom!
1076
00:59:48,640 --> 00:59:50,632
I demand complete security.
1077
00:59:50,760 --> 00:59:53,434
I'm gonna do whatever I like,
whenever I like.
1078
00:59:53,560 --> 00:59:54,835
All right!
1079
00:59:55,720 --> 00:59:57,120
Cut!
1080
00:59:57,240 --> 00:59:59,038
Pathetic bang.
1081
00:59:59,160 --> 01:00:01,720
OK. Lunch, everyone!
1082
01:00:03,720 --> 01:00:05,393
tampon commercial.
1083
01:00:05,520 --> 01:00:06,874
Pays the rent.
1084
01:00:08,160 --> 01:00:10,152
Nigel sent me your script, Sam.
1085
01:00:10,280 --> 01:00:11,760
You might be shite...
1086
01:00:11,880 --> 01:00:13,314
but you're a talented shite.
1087
01:00:13,440 --> 01:00:14,715
thank you.
1088
01:00:14,840 --> 01:00:16,832
Needs work, but I'm gonna do it.
1089
01:00:18,080 --> 01:00:19,799
(NIGEL) With him. With him.
1090
01:00:19,920 --> 01:00:22,310
(EWAN) Sam! When are you going
to give me an ending?
1091
01:00:25,147 --> 01:00:28,458
About six weeks. It depends
on how long this stuff takes
1092
01:00:28,587 --> 01:00:30,465
to shut down my ovulation.
1093
01:00:30,587 --> 01:00:34,263
So in a month and a half's time,
we could be parents.
1094
01:00:34,387 --> 01:00:36,140
Yeah. We could be.
1095
01:00:36,267 --> 01:00:37,542
Blimey.
1096
01:00:37,667 --> 01:00:40,501
Better start nailing
things of value to the ceiling.
1097
01:00:40,627 --> 01:00:43,665
Cuthbert didn't mean to smash
your Lancaster Bomber.
1098
01:00:43,787 --> 01:00:45,141
It's just he's crawling.
1099
01:00:45,267 --> 01:00:46,860
Yeah, well, I'd noticed.
1100
01:00:46,987 --> 01:00:48,387
When he can fit it
1101
01:00:48,507 --> 01:00:51,818
into his busy shrieking, shitting
and vomiting schedule.
1102
01:00:53,467 --> 01:00:55,186
I hate it when you do that bit.
1103
01:00:55,307 --> 01:00:56,821
Oh, do you really, Sam?
1104
01:00:56,947 --> 01:01:00,065
How strange, because I find it
the highlight of my sodding day!
1105
01:01:00,187 --> 01:01:01,462
You better get used to it
1106
01:01:01,587 --> 01:01:04,625
because the next lot of drugs
you have to inject into my bum,
1107
01:01:04,747 --> 01:01:06,818
and you have to practise
on an orange.
1108
01:01:08,387 --> 01:01:10,583
that could be a very funny scene.
1109
01:01:11,387 --> 01:01:12,662
What?
1110
01:01:14,307 --> 01:01:16,867
If someone... If that was seen...
1111
01:01:17,907 --> 01:01:20,502
that could be very funny,
if someone saw that.
1112
01:01:20,627 --> 01:01:22,505
through a window.
1113
01:01:25,467 --> 01:01:27,060
Ow!
1114
01:01:27,187 --> 01:01:29,099
I love this injection stuff, Sam.
1115
01:01:29,227 --> 01:01:32,026
It's fantastic to be able
to put a needle on the screen
1116
01:01:32,147 --> 01:01:34,025
that isn't a heroin spike.
1117
01:01:34,147 --> 01:01:37,299
It's so original
and it's so liberating.
1118
01:01:37,427 --> 01:01:39,783
Hasn't been done in years.
1119
01:01:39,907 --> 01:01:41,864
Although it did occur to me
1120
01:01:41,987 --> 01:01:43,944
that we might be missing out
some comedy here.
1121
01:01:44,067 --> 01:01:45,899
What if the IVF drugs
1122
01:01:46,027 --> 01:01:49,020
somehow got mixed up
with Colin's drug stash
1123
01:01:49,147 --> 01:01:51,537
and Rachel injects that instead?
1124
01:01:54,547 --> 01:01:57,426
Er, yeah, that would be great,
except...
1125
01:01:57,547 --> 01:02:00,016
Oh, damn. Colin doesn't take drugs.
1126
01:02:00,147 --> 01:02:02,059
- He doesn't?
- No.
1127
01:02:02,187 --> 01:02:04,258
- You're joking?
- I'm not.
1128
01:02:04,387 --> 01:02:05,867
that is fascinating.
1129
01:02:05,987 --> 01:02:08,741
So all that stuff
about the arse injections,
1130
01:02:08,867 --> 01:02:10,426
about practising on an orange,
1131
01:02:10,547 --> 01:02:12,186
- that's true, is it?
- Oh, yes.
1132
01:02:12,307 --> 01:02:13,707
Isn't it amazing?
1133
01:02:14,867 --> 01:02:16,540
Grown men and women
1134
01:02:16,667 --> 01:02:19,580
that have to be taught
how to use a hypodermic needle.
1135
01:02:19,707 --> 01:02:22,063
It's extraordinary.
1136
01:02:25,667 --> 01:02:28,102
Well, none of the oranges
seemed to feel a thing.
1137
01:02:28,227 --> 01:02:31,823
Now, the nurse said that if I do it
quickly and confidently,
1138
01:02:31,947 --> 01:02:33,301
it won't hurt, all right?
1139
01:02:33,427 --> 01:02:34,747
- Mmm-hmm.
- Ready?
1140
01:02:36,667 --> 01:02:39,136
One, two, three...
1141
01:02:39,587 --> 01:02:40,987
Ow!
1142
01:02:43,947 --> 01:02:46,587
For me, corridors throb
1143
01:02:46,707 --> 01:02:49,586
with suppressed energy
and sexual tension.
1144
01:02:49,707 --> 01:02:51,778
Love tubes with doors.
1145
01:02:51,907 --> 01:02:54,103
But I'll need even more light.
1146
01:02:54,227 --> 01:02:56,298
It has to be sterile.
1147
01:02:56,427 --> 01:02:58,862
Uncompromisingly umbilical,
1148
01:02:58,987 --> 01:03:01,582
but cold, bleak and dead.
1149
01:03:01,707 --> 01:03:04,267
Ewan, where are we getting
with the casting?
1150
01:03:04,387 --> 01:03:06,026
It's all getting very close.
1151
01:03:06,147 --> 01:03:08,104
Actors are like cattle, George.
1152
01:03:08,227 --> 01:03:09,980
You round 'em up when you need 'em.
1153
01:03:10,107 --> 01:03:11,587
the girl's what? 22, 23?
1154
01:03:11,707 --> 01:03:13,426
More like 30.
1155
01:03:15,907 --> 01:03:18,263
I think we need to be pretty
non-specific.
1156
01:03:18,387 --> 01:03:20,982
I mean, obviously we're not
looking at teenage waifs,
1157
01:03:21,107 --> 01:03:23,747
but she's got to be vaguely
shaggable, for Christ's sake.
1158
01:03:23,867 --> 01:03:26,427
I'll accept anything
from an old-looking 19-year-old
1159
01:03:26,547 --> 01:03:28,220
to a young 25.
1160
01:03:30,427 --> 01:03:33,898
My God, Colin, I'm asking you
to have a quick one off the wrist,
1161
01:03:34,027 --> 01:03:35,381
not shag a hedgehog!
1162
01:03:35,507 --> 01:03:38,545
I have to have
a hystero-salpingogram!
1163
01:03:40,787 --> 01:03:42,187
thank you.
1164
01:03:43,387 --> 01:03:45,458
Tilda. Tilda Bustle.
1165
01:03:45,587 --> 01:03:47,067
Five nine, 34B.
1166
01:03:47,187 --> 01:03:50,180
Horse-riding, modern dance
and elementary stage fighting.
1167
01:03:50,307 --> 01:03:52,538
that was very moving, Tilda.
1168
01:03:53,627 --> 01:03:56,142
You clearly have great depth.
1169
01:03:57,187 --> 01:03:59,179
thank you. Next!
1170
01:04:04,427 --> 01:04:06,225
too young. they're all too young.
1171
01:04:06,347 --> 01:04:08,657
Yeah, yeah. I know.
terrible, isn't it?
1172
01:04:10,347 --> 01:04:12,384
Have we definitely got
this location for a week?
1173
01:04:12,507 --> 01:04:13,782
Yes.
1174
01:04:14,747 --> 01:04:16,022
Oh, yes.
1175
01:04:17,027 --> 01:04:18,700
Superb.
1176
01:04:19,707 --> 01:04:21,061
Photo.
1177
01:04:21,187 --> 01:04:22,462
Sketch.
1178
01:04:23,307 --> 01:04:24,661
Use that.
1179
01:04:25,467 --> 01:04:26,901
Oh, yes.
1180
01:04:27,027 --> 01:04:28,905
I can see this shot already.
1181
01:04:29,947 --> 01:04:31,859
Sam, Sam, Sam...
1182
01:04:31,987 --> 01:04:33,341
Yeah?
1183
01:04:33,467 --> 01:04:35,698
Are these the kind of needles
you use?
1184
01:04:35,827 --> 01:04:37,978
Er, yes. It's an intra-muscular
injection.
1185
01:04:38,107 --> 01:04:41,100
Normally in the backside.
It's pretty painful and quite upsetting.
1186
01:04:41,227 --> 01:04:42,502
Exactly.
1187
01:04:42,627 --> 01:04:46,667
I think we should call the picture
"My Arse Is An Orange".
1188
01:04:48,667 --> 01:04:50,659
Yeah. Except it's called "Immaculate".
1189
01:04:50,787 --> 01:04:52,062
Oh, yeah, sure.
1190
01:04:53,307 --> 01:04:55,105
At the moment.
1191
01:05:01,133 --> 01:05:04,126
Sam seems to have perked up a bit
about his work.
1192
01:05:04,253 --> 01:05:06,722
Wish he'd do the same
about his sperm test.
1193
01:05:09,173 --> 01:05:11,642
Sheila sent me round
to Carl Phipps's place today
1194
01:05:11,773 --> 01:05:13,048
with some contracts.
1195
01:05:13,173 --> 01:05:16,723
I'd been half dreading this ever
since that day when he kissed me.
1196
01:05:18,093 --> 01:05:20,005
What are you up to out there?
1197
01:05:20,133 --> 01:05:21,408
Nothing!
1198
01:05:21,533 --> 01:05:22,933
He definitely planned it,
1199
01:05:23,053 --> 01:05:25,284
but I was as much to blame.
1200
01:05:25,413 --> 01:05:27,803
I went willingly to his bedroom...
1201
01:05:28,933 --> 01:05:30,572
He took off his shirt...
1202
01:05:30,693 --> 01:05:32,446
He asked me to stay,
1203
01:05:32,573 --> 01:05:35,133
but I told him I loved my husband,
1204
01:05:35,253 --> 01:05:37,370
and asked him to call me a cab.
1205
01:05:37,493 --> 01:05:39,689
Thank goodness nothing happened.
1206
01:05:40,773 --> 01:05:42,048
Well...
1207
01:05:42,173 --> 01:05:43,527
almost.
1208
01:05:55,093 --> 01:05:57,449
Why are you staring at me like that?
1209
01:06:14,093 --> 01:06:17,086
If you can bear it, Carl,
just the final line again.
1210
01:06:17,213 --> 01:06:20,012
I've got stupid sperm.
1211
01:06:20,133 --> 01:06:24,047
the stuff has been retreating
up my dick all these years.
1212
01:06:24,173 --> 01:06:25,493
What is it with sperm?
1213
01:06:25,613 --> 01:06:29,163
It's lazy, sluggish
and has no idea where it's going.
1214
01:06:29,293 --> 01:06:31,171
Sounds like a pub full of blokes.
1215
01:06:33,373 --> 01:06:34,693
Oooh.
1216
01:06:35,933 --> 01:06:37,811
It's superb, Carl.
1217
01:06:37,933 --> 01:06:40,528
It's absolutely superb.
1218
01:06:41,133 --> 01:06:42,772
I think it's a start.
1219
01:06:43,253 --> 01:06:44,767
Petra, Justin...
1220
01:06:44,893 --> 01:06:47,362
Wonderful. Bravo.
1221
01:06:47,493 --> 01:06:49,405
So good of you to agree to read
for us.
1222
01:06:49,533 --> 01:06:52,048
Hey, no actor is too big to read,
1223
01:06:52,173 --> 01:06:55,166
- particularly for Ewan.
- Oh, don't.
1224
01:06:55,293 --> 01:06:57,410
(WHISPERS) Arse-licking twat.
1225
01:06:59,693 --> 01:07:00,968
So what do you think?
1226
01:07:01,093 --> 01:07:03,767
I thought that what with the
disappearance of the rainforest,
1227
01:07:03,893 --> 01:07:07,045
it was ecologically unsound to
produce such a wooden performance.
1228
01:07:07,173 --> 01:07:09,005
Anal, uptight, repressed and stiff.
1229
01:07:09,133 --> 01:07:12,126
Exactly! A totally
convincing Englishman.
1230
01:07:13,413 --> 01:07:16,167
You know, that psoriasis
is really starting to disgust me.
1231
01:07:16,293 --> 01:07:17,886
- Isn't there anything you can take?
- No.
1232
01:07:18,013 --> 01:07:21,404
But the cruelest aspect
of an incurable condition
1233
01:07:21,533 --> 01:07:23,286
is that everybody knows a cure.
1234
01:07:23,413 --> 01:07:24,688
that's psoriasis, isn't it?
1235
01:07:24,813 --> 01:07:26,850
My cousin had that much worse
than you.
1236
01:07:26,973 --> 01:07:29,169
Her naturopath
suggested banana skins.
1237
01:07:29,293 --> 01:07:32,013
You just drape them over your body.
It really helped.
1238
01:07:32,493 --> 01:07:33,768
You see?
1239
01:07:33,893 --> 01:07:35,646
Well, they do say
it's stress-related.
1240
01:07:35,773 --> 01:07:37,810
- Perhaps if you told Lucy...
- No, thank you.
1241
01:07:37,933 --> 01:07:39,526
I prefer dandruff to death.
1242
01:07:39,653 --> 01:07:43,567
Lucy's recommended some alternative
therapies which should be fun.
1243
01:07:43,693 --> 01:07:45,810
Lots of mucus.
1244
01:07:46,773 --> 01:07:48,127
Very phlegmy.
1245
01:07:48,253 --> 01:07:50,643
Mmm. Very hot inside.
1246
01:07:50,773 --> 01:07:52,810
Very dry, very phlegmy.
1247
01:07:52,933 --> 01:07:55,129
too much mucus, too much phlegm.
1248
01:07:56,293 --> 01:07:59,570
No tomatoes and no beef. Also...
1249
01:07:59,693 --> 01:08:03,812
Boil tea. this much.
three times a day. Mmm?
1250
01:08:03,933 --> 01:08:05,287
then drink.
1251
01:08:05,413 --> 01:08:07,132
Hmm?
1252
01:08:07,253 --> 01:08:08,653
Now, what I intend to do
1253
01:08:08,773 --> 01:08:12,210
is to place six needles in the
pressure points in your temple,
1254
01:08:12,333 --> 01:08:14,973
and another 12 in your anus.
1255
01:08:15,093 --> 01:08:17,403
this will help you to relax.
1256
01:08:20,893 --> 01:08:23,886
Sam, you are so tense!
1257
01:08:26,333 --> 01:08:29,405
It's incredible to think that this
is going to be made into a film.
1258
01:08:29,533 --> 01:08:30,808
What?
1259
01:08:30,933 --> 01:08:32,925
they're making a movie
about infertility.
1260
01:08:33,053 --> 01:08:35,045
We got sent the script
at the agency.
1261
01:08:35,173 --> 01:08:37,404
I didn't read it.
It's all a bit close to home.
1262
01:08:37,533 --> 01:08:41,686
But I did feel a bit bad, having
stopped you from doing the idea.
1263
01:08:41,813 --> 01:08:44,885
You felt bad? You felt maybe
I should have done it?
1264
01:08:45,013 --> 01:08:48,973
I just couldn't have borne for it
to be based on us directly.
1265
01:08:49,093 --> 01:08:52,131
It would have just...
It would all have gone too deep.
1266
01:08:52,653 --> 01:08:53,928
Oh.
1267
01:08:55,093 --> 01:08:57,369
You know, they've cast
one of our people in it.
1268
01:08:57,493 --> 01:08:59,450
Carl Phipps as the husband.
1269
01:08:59,573 --> 01:09:01,132
I think he'll be superb.
1270
01:09:01,253 --> 01:09:03,404
He's a really nice man
1271
01:09:03,533 --> 01:09:05,684
and a truly sensitive actor.
1272
01:09:06,933 --> 01:09:10,768
- Ow! Sam!
- Sorry.
1273
01:09:13,440 --> 01:09:16,877
Please, God, make me pregnant.
I want a baby so very much.
1274
01:09:17,120 --> 01:09:18,474
Actually, Ewan,
1275
01:09:18,600 --> 01:09:22,480
I thought it might be better
if I was closer to the camera.
1276
01:09:22,600 --> 01:09:23,920
try it. Yeah.
1277
01:09:27,000 --> 01:09:28,719
Please, God, make me pregnant...
1278
01:09:28,840 --> 01:09:32,516
Ewan, Ewan, I thought I might
try it in Cockney. Just to see.
1279
01:09:32,640 --> 01:09:35,200
OK, Carl. Yeah. Give it a whirl.
1280
01:09:35,320 --> 01:09:38,199
take it from
"You don't even want children."
1281
01:09:38,840 --> 01:09:41,196
You're lucky.
You don't even want children.
1282
01:09:41,320 --> 01:09:44,154
Not children in the abstract sense,
no...
1283
01:09:44,280 --> 01:09:46,351
- Doesn't work, Carl.
- Fine, fine.
1284
01:09:46,480 --> 01:09:48,039
It was just a thought.
1285
01:09:48,160 --> 01:09:49,640
And again,
1286
01:09:49,760 --> 01:09:51,080
in your own time.
1287
01:09:52,760 --> 01:09:55,400
Not children in the abstract sense,
no...
1288
01:09:58,040 --> 01:09:59,759
but as a part of you,
1289
01:09:59,880 --> 01:10:02,793
as an expression and extension
of our love,
1290
01:10:02,920 --> 01:10:05,913
I want that more than anything
I can imagine.
1291
01:10:06,720 --> 01:10:09,280
And if we don't have them,
then that's all right too,
1292
01:10:09,400 --> 01:10:12,791
because...because we still have us.
1293
01:10:12,920 --> 01:10:14,354
Don't you see?
1294
01:10:14,480 --> 01:10:17,075
And our love will be no less whole.
1295
01:10:22,440 --> 01:10:23,874
It's getting there.
1296
01:10:30,600 --> 01:10:34,879
to me, Nimnh, this is a key speech.
1297
01:10:35,840 --> 01:10:38,753
this is the real guts
of the piece here.
1298
01:10:38,880 --> 01:10:40,712
I cried when I read it.
1299
01:10:40,840 --> 01:10:42,320
Good girl.
1300
01:10:42,760 --> 01:10:44,479
Now, in your own time.
1301
01:10:49,320 --> 01:10:53,519
As we get closer to the day
that may or may not see me reborn...
1302
01:10:54,360 --> 01:10:57,831
the longing inside me seems
to become almost physical.
1303
01:10:58,400 --> 01:11:02,076
A sort of morning sickness
for the barren and the unfulfilled.
1304
01:11:02,200 --> 01:11:04,635
Every young mother that I see
1305
01:11:04,760 --> 01:11:09,357
is a simultaneous moment
of exultation and despair.
1306
01:11:10,480 --> 01:11:14,030
I don't know why it is that women
feel such a deep need
1307
01:11:14,160 --> 01:11:16,470
to create life
from within themselves.
1308
01:11:16,600 --> 01:11:19,638
Why they yearn for a time
when their own flesh
1309
01:11:19,760 --> 01:11:21,274
will bring them comfort.
1310
01:11:22,280 --> 01:11:24,033
But I know that they do.
1311
01:11:24,160 --> 01:11:27,312
That's an experience
which most women -
1312
01:11:27,440 --> 01:11:29,238
women with children -
1313
01:11:29,360 --> 01:11:30,999
miss out on in life.
1314
01:11:32,320 --> 01:11:34,516
The intensely female grief
1315
01:11:34,640 --> 01:11:36,677
which accompanies the fear
1316
01:11:36,800 --> 01:11:40,271
that those children
might never exist.
1317
01:11:46,280 --> 01:11:47,680
Well done, mate.
1318
01:11:47,800 --> 01:11:49,120
It's tremendous.
1319
01:11:49,240 --> 01:11:50,594
You've really found her.
1320
01:11:56,600 --> 01:11:58,080
Ewan, we need to meet with you.
1321
01:11:58,200 --> 01:11:59,714
Sam is out of his bloody mind.
1322
01:11:59,840 --> 01:12:01,433
He wants to pull his script!
1323
01:12:01,560 --> 01:12:03,756
I'm sorry, but it's my script
and I want it back.
1324
01:12:03,880 --> 01:12:05,234
No, it's not your script, mate.
1325
01:12:05,360 --> 01:12:07,192
It's ours, bought and paid for.
1326
01:12:07,320 --> 01:12:09,915
I don't have to finish it.
the final scene isn't written yet.
1327
01:12:10,040 --> 01:12:11,474
We'll bring in a writer who will.
1328
01:12:11,600 --> 01:12:14,354
then I'll break your bloody arms!
this is my life!
1329
01:12:14,480 --> 01:12:16,915
Oh, it's the wife
that's the problem, is it?
1330
01:12:17,040 --> 01:12:18,599
Oh... Oh, back off!
1331
01:12:18,720 --> 01:12:20,552
take it easy, will you?
1332
01:12:20,680 --> 01:12:22,000
Sam...
1333
01:12:22,680 --> 01:12:24,034
Look.
1334
01:12:25,200 --> 01:12:28,637
I can see you're hurting here,
but you have to think.
1335
01:12:28,760 --> 01:12:30,433
You're an artist.
1336
01:12:30,560 --> 01:12:32,677
this is a fine piece of writing.
1337
01:12:32,800 --> 01:12:36,032
It needs to be seen
and seen your way.
1338
01:12:36,160 --> 01:12:39,073
this is your art, man.
1339
01:12:39,920 --> 01:12:41,991
You have to suffer for it.
1340
01:12:42,120 --> 01:12:43,713
that's the rule.
1341
01:12:45,120 --> 01:12:47,555
You don't get it.
It's worse than you think.
1342
01:12:47,680 --> 01:12:50,479
She'll understand. You had to do it.
You're a writer.
1343
01:12:50,600 --> 01:12:51,920
No, I'm not!
1344
01:12:53,480 --> 01:12:54,960
I'm a plagiarist.
1345
01:12:56,360 --> 01:12:59,398
A thief. I am the lowest
kind of shit.
1346
01:13:02,480 --> 01:13:04,358
You know the woman's voice?
1347
01:13:04,480 --> 01:13:06,597
- Mmm.
- I didn't find it.
1348
01:13:06,720 --> 01:13:08,313
I stole it.
1349
01:13:08,440 --> 01:13:10,159
What do you mean, stole it?
1350
01:13:10,280 --> 01:13:11,714
It's Lucy.
1351
01:13:11,840 --> 01:13:13,194
Lucy's been writing it?
1352
01:13:14,400 --> 01:13:15,959
Yeah. In a way she has.
1353
01:13:18,320 --> 01:13:20,994
- I've been reading her diary.
- Her diary!
1354
01:13:21,120 --> 01:13:22,952
God, I wish I'd never done it,
1355
01:13:23,080 --> 01:13:24,833
but it was there
and I couldn't resist it.
1356
01:13:24,960 --> 01:13:28,237
Sam, this just gets worse.
You've got to tell her.
1357
01:13:28,360 --> 01:13:30,829
Well, of course I'll tell her,
but I can't tell her now.
1358
01:13:30,960 --> 01:13:33,191
She's doing IVF.
She's totally hormonal.
1359
01:13:33,320 --> 01:13:35,312
Her emotions are all over the place.
1360
01:13:36,880 --> 01:13:39,952
I'll tell her soon...
when I know how the story ends.
1361
01:13:43,586 --> 01:13:45,543
Right. Lovely. Hope you're fit.
1362
01:13:45,666 --> 01:13:49,103
We're right at the end here.
It's quite a hike.
1363
01:13:49,226 --> 01:13:50,546
Here we are.
1364
01:13:50,666 --> 01:13:53,625
Okey-doke, Luce. If you'd like
to pop yourself in here.
1365
01:13:53,746 --> 01:13:55,624
Pop yourself right up there,
1366
01:13:55,746 --> 01:13:58,102
pop your togs off
and pop one of these on.
1367
01:13:58,226 --> 01:14:00,138
It's a little breezy at the back,
1368
01:14:00,266 --> 01:14:02,826
but the doctors have got
to get at your bits somehow.
1369
01:14:02,946 --> 01:14:04,266
Now, then, Sammy,
1370
01:14:04,386 --> 01:14:07,060
we're going to need
a little deposit from you.
1371
01:14:07,186 --> 01:14:08,859
So there's your paying-in pot.
1372
01:14:08,986 --> 01:14:12,502
I'll give you a call
when there's a service till free.
1373
01:14:12,626 --> 01:14:15,778
Okey-dokey.
Check you in a couple of ticks.
1374
01:14:17,706 --> 01:14:19,060
Dignified little number.
1375
01:14:20,346 --> 01:14:22,656
I think I'll wear it to a première.
1376
01:14:22,786 --> 01:14:25,221
- What? What première?
- What?
1377
01:14:25,346 --> 01:14:27,224
You said première. What première?
1378
01:14:27,346 --> 01:14:30,145
Any old première. Calm down.
I was only joking.
1379
01:14:32,386 --> 01:14:35,106
And it's time
for the gentleman's excuse-me.
1380
01:14:35,226 --> 01:14:37,946
So take your partners, please,
for the knuckle shuffle.
1381
01:14:48,546 --> 01:14:50,503
No, no. I'm just not getting it.
1382
01:14:50,626 --> 01:14:52,106
Let me try something.
1383
01:14:52,226 --> 01:14:53,546
Give me a script.
1384
01:14:53,666 --> 01:14:55,020
Sam...
1385
01:14:55,146 --> 01:14:57,138
Look, I know you don't exactly
like Carl,
1386
01:14:57,266 --> 01:14:58,905
but this is a crucial scene,
1387
01:14:59,026 --> 01:15:01,382
and I want him to hear
your take on it.
1388
01:15:03,746 --> 01:15:05,100
Ewan?
1389
01:15:05,706 --> 01:15:07,140
Working.
1390
01:15:08,266 --> 01:15:10,622
Er...Carl...
1391
01:15:10,746 --> 01:15:12,021
Mmm?
1392
01:15:12,146 --> 01:15:15,025
this is a very big moment for Colin.
1393
01:15:15,146 --> 01:15:17,183
the stakes are very high.
1394
01:15:18,146 --> 01:15:19,626
His wife...
1395
01:15:19,746 --> 01:15:22,864
whom he loves very, very much...
1396
01:15:24,186 --> 01:15:26,143
has just gone through six weeks
1397
01:15:26,266 --> 01:15:28,906
of the most appallingly
intrusive therapy.
1398
01:15:29,026 --> 01:15:33,259
Her ovaries are now heavy
and bloated and painful.
1399
01:15:33,386 --> 01:15:36,060
Every other day for weeks
she's been traipsing across London
1400
01:15:36,186 --> 01:15:39,020
to sit in queues with
a lot of other anxious women,
1401
01:15:39,146 --> 01:15:43,743
waiting to have her most intimate
self probed and manipulated.
1402
01:15:43,866 --> 01:15:45,380
the reason for all this, of course,
1403
01:15:45,506 --> 01:15:48,658
is her desperate heartfelt longing
to have a child.
1404
01:15:48,786 --> 01:15:50,106
Yeah.
1405
01:15:50,226 --> 01:15:51,979
Now, if at this point,
1406
01:15:52,106 --> 01:15:56,498
her husband fails to ejaculate
successfully...
1407
01:15:57,426 --> 01:15:59,895
then the whole business
has been for nothing.
1408
01:16:00,026 --> 01:16:02,700
So with all this pressure...
1409
01:16:04,146 --> 01:16:08,106
Colin now has to sit
alone in a room, and...
1410
01:16:08,306 --> 01:16:11,617
do his duty by the woman he loves.
1411
01:16:13,306 --> 01:16:14,899
Right.
1412
01:16:15,026 --> 01:16:16,460
Now...
1413
01:16:16,586 --> 01:16:19,260
obviously we can't show him wanking,
1414
01:16:19,386 --> 01:16:21,776
so you've got to give us
all that information
1415
01:16:21,906 --> 01:16:24,978
in a mute two-second close up.
1416
01:16:26,146 --> 01:16:28,536
Oh, that's it. Brilliant. Hold that.
1417
01:16:28,666 --> 01:16:30,464
Hold that. Shooting.
1418
01:16:31,506 --> 01:16:34,977
So the white dot on the screen
is the needle.
1419
01:16:36,146 --> 01:16:38,377
I'm lining it up with the follicle...
1420
01:16:39,706 --> 01:16:41,538
and now we see it deflated.
1421
01:16:41,666 --> 01:16:45,342
And we're removing the fluid within,
which will be the eggs.
1422
01:16:46,866 --> 01:16:48,220
there we go.
1423
01:16:55,626 --> 01:16:56,946
Just think about it.
1424
01:16:57,066 --> 01:17:00,377
It's not many children who get to
see themselves three cells big.
1425
01:17:00,506 --> 01:17:03,340
You know the chances are
that these ones won't.
1426
01:17:03,466 --> 01:17:05,776
I know. But the least we can do
1427
01:17:05,906 --> 01:17:09,104
is give Dick and Debbie
as much positive energy as we can.
1428
01:17:09,226 --> 01:17:10,785
Dick and Debbie?
1429
01:17:10,906 --> 01:17:14,297
that's what I'm calling them.
I don't know why.
1430
01:17:14,986 --> 01:17:16,943
Do you think that's a good idea?
1431
01:17:17,066 --> 01:17:19,661
they're fertilised embryos, Sam.
1432
01:17:19,786 --> 01:17:23,462
Just getting that far
is a huge step for us.
1433
01:17:23,586 --> 01:17:25,942
We're so far down the road.
1434
01:17:26,066 --> 01:17:28,786
Yeah, but it's still
only a one in five chance.
1435
01:17:28,906 --> 01:17:30,420
I know, I know.
1436
01:17:30,546 --> 01:17:33,345
But 20% isn't a bad shot.
1437
01:17:33,466 --> 01:17:35,298
Just think...
1438
01:17:35,426 --> 01:17:38,419
when this photo was taken,
they were alive.
1439
01:17:38,546 --> 01:17:42,062
two living entities
created by you and me.
1440
01:17:42,186 --> 01:17:46,146
All they have to do is hang on
for a few more days.
1441
01:17:47,746 --> 01:17:49,738
they just need to hang on.
1442
01:17:50,426 --> 01:17:52,543
Come on, Dick and Debbie.
1443
01:17:56,026 --> 01:17:57,858
Come on, Dick and Debbie.
1444
01:17:59,386 --> 01:18:01,821
All right, girls,
we're going to rehearse now.
1445
01:18:02,786 --> 01:18:04,539
Rehearsal!
1446
01:18:06,946 --> 01:18:08,665
Oh...
1447
01:18:08,786 --> 01:18:10,823
Well, that's it.
1448
01:18:10,946 --> 01:18:14,576
Bum injected. Pessary inserted.
1449
01:18:15,506 --> 01:18:18,783
I hope Dick and Debbie realise
what I'm going through for them.
1450
01:18:18,906 --> 01:18:20,625
One day you'll be able to tell them.
1451
01:18:20,746 --> 01:18:23,545
Mmm. there's only
a one in five chance.
1452
01:18:24,546 --> 01:18:27,300
Lucy, any child of yours
would be one in a million.
1453
01:18:29,386 --> 01:18:32,060
You know, when all this is over,
for better or...
1454
01:18:32,186 --> 01:18:34,098
Well, hopefully for better...
1455
01:18:34,226 --> 01:18:35,979
there are some things...
1456
01:18:37,186 --> 01:18:40,224
I need to talk to you about.
Some things I need to tell you.
1457
01:18:40,346 --> 01:18:42,178
I love you, Sam.
1458
01:18:58,076 --> 01:18:59,874
Well done. It's fantastic.
1459
01:18:59,996 --> 01:19:02,386
I just feel
it's going to be all right.
1460
01:19:02,516 --> 01:19:04,473
(SHE SOBS)
1461
01:19:14,796 --> 01:19:16,674
It's all going to be all right.
1462
01:19:18,476 --> 01:19:19,751
It has to be.
1463
01:19:19,876 --> 01:19:23,426
Oh, hello. Could I speak
to Sam Bell, please? It's his wife.
1464
01:19:24,916 --> 01:19:27,909
No, you can't take a message.
It's very important.
1465
01:19:28,036 --> 01:19:29,550
Can you tell me where he is?
1466
01:19:51,636 --> 01:19:55,346
I want to start with a mid close-up
on Rachel's jacksie.
1467
01:19:55,476 --> 01:19:58,992
So let's really hammer home
the heartbreaking vulnerability.
1468
01:20:04,876 --> 01:20:08,108
OK. I wanna start getting ready
to shoot this now.
1469
01:20:45,276 --> 01:20:48,826
Dignified little number. I think
I'll wear it to a première.
1470
01:20:48,956 --> 01:20:51,027
Oh, sorry, sorry. that was crap.
1471
01:20:51,156 --> 01:20:53,148
No, no, no. that was great.
1472
01:20:56,116 --> 01:20:57,994
Right, this next bit...
1473
01:20:58,116 --> 01:21:02,429
Now, this is a very pathetic moment.
1474
01:21:03,476 --> 01:21:08,073
Semi-distraught,
emotionally-dysfunctional woman
1475
01:21:08,196 --> 01:21:11,712
making jokes while her heart breaks.
1476
01:21:11,836 --> 01:21:14,271
We'll pick up a close-up here, OK?
1477
01:21:14,396 --> 01:21:16,865
Now, to me, Nimnh...
1478
01:21:16,996 --> 01:21:20,068
this scene represents
the culmination of her descent
1479
01:21:20,196 --> 01:21:23,268
into a sort of sad madness.
1480
01:21:24,276 --> 01:21:27,667
think of the earlier scenes,
and trust Sam's writing here.
1481
01:21:27,796 --> 01:21:29,947
the doomed personal commitment
1482
01:21:30,076 --> 01:21:33,035
to remaining
an emotionally-functional woman.
1483
01:21:33,156 --> 01:21:37,150
the fantasies of Beatrix Potter
and Winnie the Pooh.
1484
01:21:37,276 --> 01:21:39,427
Sometimes she prays.
1485
01:21:39,556 --> 01:21:42,549
She's been seriously considering
going to Dorset
1486
01:21:42,676 --> 01:21:45,145
and making love
on a chalk giant's genitals.
1487
01:21:46,356 --> 01:21:48,393
She's reduced her sex life
1488
01:21:48,516 --> 01:21:52,305
to a series
of clinically-calculated servicings.
1489
01:21:52,436 --> 01:21:54,826
You bastard, Sam!
1490
01:21:54,956 --> 01:21:57,835
You heartless swine.
1491
01:21:59,276 --> 01:22:01,074
I've got my period, by the way.
1492
01:22:01,196 --> 01:22:03,665
We failed. they've gone.
1493
01:22:03,796 --> 01:22:05,355
Don't be embarrassed.
1494
01:22:05,476 --> 01:22:08,753
You'll be hearing it all soon
anyway. She'll be saying it soon.
1495
01:22:08,876 --> 01:22:10,469
Lucy, what's going on here?
1496
01:22:10,596 --> 01:22:13,316
Ask him. He's told you
everything else about me.
1497
01:22:14,276 --> 01:22:17,428
My God, Sam, you've used it all!
1498
01:22:17,556 --> 01:22:20,515
Er, excuse me? Are we
making a movie here or what?
1499
01:22:20,636 --> 01:22:22,275
- Ewan, please.
- Lucy...
1500
01:22:22,396 --> 01:22:24,547
- Get away from me.
- What is going on?
1501
01:22:24,676 --> 01:22:26,349
You read my book, Sam.
1502
01:22:26,476 --> 01:22:28,593
You've stolen my thoughts.
1503
01:22:29,956 --> 01:22:32,027
Well, here's another little thing
about me
1504
01:22:32,156 --> 01:22:35,308
that you don't need to read
other people's diaries to get.
1505
01:22:35,436 --> 01:22:36,711
I hate you!
1506
01:22:36,836 --> 01:22:40,512
I hate you more than I ever thought
it was possible to hate anyone,
1507
01:22:40,636 --> 01:22:43,674
and I never want to see
or speak to you again!
1508
01:22:46,396 --> 01:22:48,956
Lucy... Lucy!
1509
01:22:51,556 --> 01:22:53,627
I hope you were taking all that in,
Nimnh,
1510
01:22:53,756 --> 01:22:56,669
because that is the sort
of emotional intensity
1511
01:22:56,796 --> 01:22:58,310
we're looking for here.
1512
01:23:01,396 --> 01:23:02,876
Lucy, listen...
1513
01:23:03,516 --> 01:23:06,873
Please. You're wrong.
You're overreacting because we failed.
1514
01:23:06,996 --> 01:23:10,034
Please. I was going to tell you.
Let me explain.
1515
01:23:10,156 --> 01:23:13,228
I meant what I said, Sam.
I hate you. I really do.
1516
01:23:13,356 --> 01:23:15,029
Lucy, please don't do this.
1517
01:23:15,156 --> 01:23:16,795
You've read my book.
1518
01:23:16,916 --> 01:23:20,307
You know that the thing I wanted
most was to have a child with you.
1519
01:23:20,436 --> 01:23:22,951
Well, it's not any more.
It's the thing I want least.
1520
01:23:23,076 --> 01:23:27,787
I'm glad Dick and Debbie are dead!
I'm glad they never fucking lived!
1521
01:23:28,236 --> 01:23:29,909
I can't sleep
1522
01:23:32,036 --> 01:23:34,392
Everything I ever knew
1523
01:23:36,316 --> 01:23:38,114
Is a lie
1524
01:23:39,556 --> 01:23:43,027
Without you
1525
01:23:44,036 --> 01:23:45,993
I can't breathe
1526
01:23:47,316 --> 01:23:50,070
When my heart is broke in two
1527
01:23:51,236 --> 01:23:52,955
there's no beat...
1528
01:23:53,076 --> 01:23:56,467
I didn't see Sam
for quite a long time after that.
1529
01:23:56,596 --> 01:23:59,634
Although I couldn't bring myself
to ask him for a divorce.
1530
01:23:59,756 --> 01:24:02,874
You're not gone,
but you're not here
1531
01:24:02,996 --> 01:24:06,751
At least that's the way
it seems tonight
1532
01:24:06,876 --> 01:24:08,310
If we could try...
1533
01:24:08,436 --> 01:24:10,905
I think I went a bit mad.
1534
01:24:11,036 --> 01:24:13,835
And even ended up having
a brief fling with Carl Phipps.
1535
01:24:13,956 --> 01:24:16,676
My God, did that nearly
change my life forever.
1536
01:24:16,796 --> 01:24:19,550
I don't wanna fight no more
1537
01:24:19,676 --> 01:24:22,828
I forgot what we were fighting for
1538
01:24:22,956 --> 01:24:26,870
And this loneliness
that's in my heart
1539
01:24:26,996 --> 01:24:31,707
Won't let me be apart from you
1540
01:24:31,836 --> 01:24:34,431
I don't wanna have to try
1541
01:24:34,556 --> 01:24:37,913
Girl, to live without you
in my life...
1542
01:24:38,036 --> 01:24:39,629
Wow!
1543
01:24:42,516 --> 01:24:44,428
- Are you nervous?
- A bit.
1544
01:24:46,556 --> 01:24:49,628
It's not every day a girl gets
to go to a première of a film
1545
01:24:49,756 --> 01:24:51,827
she co-wrote
without even knowing it.
1546
01:24:51,956 --> 01:24:55,427
I must say, it was generous of Sam
to share it all with me.
1547
01:24:56,676 --> 01:24:58,395
You look great.
1548
01:24:59,396 --> 01:25:02,787
I just love Catherine Walker
haute couture.
1549
01:25:04,716 --> 01:25:07,709
Carl, about what you said
on the phone...
1550
01:25:07,836 --> 01:25:09,111
Mmm.
1551
01:25:09,236 --> 01:25:12,115
You do know that you're under
no obligation, don't you?
1552
01:25:12,236 --> 01:25:15,149
If it turns out that I am...
1553
01:25:15,276 --> 01:25:17,029
Oh, no, Lucy, darling.
1554
01:25:17,156 --> 01:25:19,068
Walk away from that thought.
1555
01:25:19,196 --> 01:25:20,789
I'm on. No questions.
1556
01:25:20,916 --> 01:25:23,385
Oh, I'm bloody thrilled.
1557
01:25:23,516 --> 01:25:27,226
It's just a bit of a shock,
that's all.
1558
01:25:27,356 --> 01:25:29,712
Since you said you couldn't.
1559
01:25:31,076 --> 01:25:34,706
Well, I thought I couldn't,
but it seems that maybe...
1560
01:25:34,836 --> 01:25:36,429
just maybe...
1561
01:25:36,556 --> 01:25:37,876
I can.
1562
01:25:37,996 --> 01:25:39,828
And that's great.
1563
01:25:41,116 --> 01:25:43,915
that's really, really...great.
1564
01:25:45,796 --> 01:25:47,230
Come on. Let's go.
1565
01:25:55,636 --> 01:25:56,956
Shall we?
1566
01:26:00,956 --> 01:26:02,231
Come on, Sam!
1567
01:26:02,356 --> 01:26:04,916
You've been bloody dreaming of this
since you were a kid.
1568
01:26:19,676 --> 01:26:21,429
(FEEDBACK FROM SPEAKER)
1569
01:26:23,556 --> 01:26:26,276
It was kind of you to volunteer
to be my date, George.
1570
01:26:26,396 --> 01:26:28,911
William and I would have looked
a bit sad together.
1571
01:26:29,036 --> 01:26:32,074
- I hope Melinda doesn't mind.
- Nah. We'll see her there.
1572
01:26:32,196 --> 01:26:35,314
Besides, it gave me a chance
to finish your new screenplay.
1573
01:26:35,436 --> 01:26:36,916
It's very, very good.
1574
01:26:37,036 --> 01:26:39,949
Uncomfortably so.
Do you really miss her that much?
1575
01:26:40,076 --> 01:26:42,875
- Oh, George...
- Yeah, right. Stupid question.
1576
01:26:43,436 --> 01:26:45,667
Well, we're in for a great evening (!)
1577
01:26:48,383 --> 01:26:50,340
(NIMNH) I was happy with the nudity.
1578
01:26:50,463 --> 01:26:53,456
Being Celtic,
I'm very passionate and primal.
1579
01:26:53,583 --> 01:26:55,939
I hated every single second of it.
1580
01:26:56,063 --> 01:26:58,658
Hated it? We're a smash!
1581
01:26:58,783 --> 01:27:02,902
Yeah. My people have been talking
to the Bond people, obviously, but...
1582
01:27:03,023 --> 01:27:06,300
but I have a hankering
to join Le Cuestatatat.
1583
01:27:06,423 --> 01:27:09,814
Er, an intriguing troupe
of Peruvian bungee jumpers.
1584
01:27:09,943 --> 01:27:12,139
Don't get me wrong.
I thought the film was great.
1585
01:27:12,263 --> 01:27:13,538
that's why I hated it.
1586
01:27:13,663 --> 01:27:16,462
I wanted it to be bad
because that's what I deserve.
1587
01:27:16,583 --> 01:27:18,540
God, I hate the English!
1588
01:28:05,503 --> 01:28:07,176
You look stunning.
1589
01:28:07,983 --> 01:28:10,179
You look like Rasputin.
1590
01:28:15,663 --> 01:28:17,973
I thought the film
was wonderful, Sam.
1591
01:28:20,983 --> 01:28:23,179
Well, you wrote the best bits.
1592
01:28:23,903 --> 01:28:27,658
Oh, don't be ridiculous.
I recognised about four lines.
1593
01:28:28,263 --> 01:28:29,982
No, it's your film and...
1594
01:28:30,103 --> 01:28:31,776
you should be very proud.
1595
01:28:35,103 --> 01:28:36,742
It wasn't worth it.
1596
01:28:39,943 --> 01:28:41,662
I learnt a lot.
1597
01:28:43,223 --> 01:28:45,943
I wish you'd told me
some of those things at the time.
1598
01:28:49,743 --> 01:28:52,941
Well, it'd be nice to meet up,
you know, to talk.
1599
01:28:53,063 --> 01:28:55,498
William misses you.
He's pining away.
1600
01:28:56,823 --> 01:28:58,496
I don't know, Sam.
1601
01:28:59,783 --> 01:29:01,183
Maybe.
1602
01:29:28,903 --> 01:29:30,462
OK, William.
1603
01:29:31,503 --> 01:29:32,823
Ready?
1604
01:29:32,943 --> 01:29:34,218
And go.
1605
01:29:37,063 --> 01:29:40,500
Come on, William.
We discussed this. Howl.
1606
01:29:41,983 --> 01:29:44,214
Come on. Howl, you bastard, howl!
1607
01:29:45,423 --> 01:29:47,062
Go away, Sam.
1608
01:29:47,943 --> 01:29:49,218
Lucy.
1609
01:29:49,343 --> 01:29:50,777
Lucy!
1610
01:29:51,903 --> 01:29:54,463
Please, just listen to me.
1611
01:29:59,583 --> 01:30:01,700
"Love is not love...
1612
01:30:03,183 --> 01:30:06,733
"which alters
when it alteration finds.
1613
01:30:07,823 --> 01:30:09,143
"Oh, no.
1614
01:30:09,823 --> 01:30:11,894
"It is an ever fixed mark
1615
01:30:12,023 --> 01:30:15,061
"that looks on tempests
and is never shaken.
1616
01:30:16,183 --> 01:30:17,856
"It is the star
1617
01:30:17,983 --> 01:30:20,578
"to every wandering bark."
1618
01:30:26,983 --> 01:30:28,895
I'll be in the park tomorrow.
1619
01:30:29,023 --> 01:30:31,299
I'll be there every day.
1620
01:30:38,263 --> 01:30:39,936
thank you. Very big help.
1621
01:30:40,943 --> 01:30:42,377
You were terrific.
1622
01:31:27,508 --> 01:31:29,465
You look wonderful, Lucy.
1623
01:31:29,588 --> 01:31:32,899
- You look like a dream.
- Sam, don't, please...
1624
01:31:33,028 --> 01:31:34,621
It's all right. I know.
1625
01:31:35,548 --> 01:31:37,107
What?
1626
01:31:37,228 --> 01:31:40,221
Sheila told me. You're pregnant.
1627
01:31:42,108 --> 01:31:45,419
She shouldn't have done that, Sam.
It's really early days.
1628
01:31:45,548 --> 01:31:47,938
I mean, I haven't even been
to the doctor yet.
1629
01:31:48,068 --> 01:31:50,583
I'm going in this afternoon.
Hi, there.
1630
01:31:50,708 --> 01:31:53,177
But, Lucy, it's wonderful news.
1631
01:31:53,308 --> 01:31:56,745
It's truly wonderful. You deserve
it more than any woman I know.
1632
01:31:56,868 --> 01:31:58,348
I'm so happy for you.
1633
01:31:59,548 --> 01:32:01,858
I'd like to kill Carl Phipps,
of course,
1634
01:32:01,988 --> 01:32:05,777
but that's just me being
an insanely jealous bastard.
1635
01:32:05,908 --> 01:32:07,900
Carl doesn't want a child, Sam.
1636
01:32:08,028 --> 01:32:11,146
In fact, he doesn't even want to be
in a relationship.
1637
01:32:11,268 --> 01:32:14,625
And I don't want one with him.
It was just a silly fling.
1638
01:32:14,748 --> 01:32:16,626
Of course I'm happy I'm pregnant,
1639
01:32:16,748 --> 01:32:19,308
but I didn't want it
to be like this.
1640
01:32:20,388 --> 01:32:22,220
It's such a shame that we...
1641
01:32:25,388 --> 01:32:26,663
Anyway.
1642
01:32:26,788 --> 01:32:28,666
Goodbye, Sam.
1643
01:32:28,788 --> 01:32:30,381
Bye, William.
1644
01:32:38,668 --> 01:32:40,546
Lucy! Lucy, come back to me!
1645
01:32:43,388 --> 01:32:44,822
Please.
1646
01:32:45,548 --> 01:32:47,904
I made the stupidest mistake
of my life.
1647
01:32:48,028 --> 01:32:51,385
I've hated myself
ever since I started it.
1648
01:32:51,508 --> 01:32:53,579
Please come back.
1649
01:32:54,668 --> 01:32:57,137
Sam, we can't pick up
where we left off.
1650
01:32:58,228 --> 01:33:01,107
Especially if I'm pregnant
with another man's child.
1651
01:33:03,788 --> 01:33:05,461
I'll bring it up.
1652
01:33:07,788 --> 01:33:09,142
I'll take care of it.
1653
01:33:09,268 --> 01:33:10,668
I'll be its father.
1654
01:33:11,588 --> 01:33:14,057
Sam, you didn't even want children
of your own,
1655
01:33:14,188 --> 01:33:16,145
let alone someone else's.
1656
01:33:16,268 --> 01:33:18,385
What you live for is your writing.
1657
01:33:18,508 --> 01:33:21,228
Well, can't a man change,
for God's sake?
1658
01:33:21,348 --> 01:33:23,340
I said I'll be its father.
1659
01:33:27,828 --> 01:33:29,103
Lucy...
1660
01:33:29,228 --> 01:33:31,788
If I have to serve a life sentence
for what I did,
1661
01:33:31,908 --> 01:33:34,980
can't I at least serve it with you?
1662
01:33:36,748 --> 01:33:38,501
Is that a line from your new script?
1663
01:33:38,628 --> 01:33:39,903
No.
1664
01:33:42,868 --> 01:33:44,188
Well, yes, actually it is.
1665
01:33:46,988 --> 01:33:48,627
But I still mean it.
1666
01:33:50,868 --> 01:33:52,222
Please.
1667
01:34:07,548 --> 01:34:09,505
the beard has got to go.
1668
01:34:44,068 --> 01:34:48,028
I suppose I was stupid to get
so excited about a home test.
1669
01:34:48,148 --> 01:34:50,538
they say on the box
you can get it wrong,
1670
01:34:50,668 --> 01:34:52,660
and I suppose this one did.
1671
01:34:52,788 --> 01:34:55,383
But she did say
you might have been pregnant.
1672
01:34:55,508 --> 01:34:57,500
Possibly, briefly.
1673
01:34:57,628 --> 01:35:00,268
But, anyway,
I'm certainly not any more.
1674
01:35:01,548 --> 01:35:04,188
Oh, Sam, what are we going to do?
1675
01:35:05,788 --> 01:35:07,108
Well...
1676
01:35:07,868 --> 01:35:09,939
We've only tried one cycle of IVF
1677
01:35:10,068 --> 01:35:13,618
and they haven't found anything
wrong with either of us, so...
1678
01:35:13,748 --> 01:35:16,786
On reflection, I suggest that...
1679
01:35:17,868 --> 01:35:22,943
we love each other
absolutely and unequivocally
1680
01:35:23,068 --> 01:35:24,627
for the rest of our lives...
1681
01:35:25,588 --> 01:35:27,784
one beautiful day at a time.
1682
01:35:34,308 --> 01:35:35,708
Maybe, baby
1683
01:35:35,828 --> 01:35:37,581
I'll have you
1684
01:35:37,708 --> 01:35:39,062
Maybe, baby
1685
01:35:39,188 --> 01:35:40,781
You'll be true
1686
01:35:40,908 --> 01:35:42,183
Maybe, baby
1687
01:35:42,308 --> 01:35:44,539
I'll have you for me...
1688
01:35:44,668 --> 01:35:47,308
- Ho ho ho!
- Aagh!
1689
01:35:47,428 --> 01:35:48,703
It's funny, honey
1690
01:35:48,828 --> 01:35:51,662
You don't care
You never listen...
1691
01:35:51,788 --> 01:35:53,620
And this, we can use.
1692
01:35:53,748 --> 01:35:55,262
Maybe, baby
1693
01:35:55,388 --> 01:35:58,460
You will love me some day
1694
01:36:00,668 --> 01:36:03,502
You are the one that makes me glad
1695
01:36:03,628 --> 01:36:06,348
And you are the one
that makes me sad
1696
01:36:06,468 --> 01:36:08,346
When some day
1697
01:36:08,468 --> 01:36:11,028
You want me
Well, I'll be there,
1698
01:36:11,148 --> 01:36:13,185
Just wait and see...
1699
01:36:13,308 --> 01:36:15,982
(SAM) Where did you say this
ancient symbol of fertility was?
1700
01:36:16,108 --> 01:36:19,180
(LUCY) the chalk giant?
It's on a hill in Dorset.
1701
01:36:19,308 --> 01:36:23,097
(SAM) Shall I take the Great West
Road or just follow a ley line?
1702
01:36:26,548 --> 01:36:28,028
Maybe, baby
1703
01:36:28,148 --> 01:36:30,743
I'll have you for me.
1704
01:36:32,068 --> 01:36:34,742
(BABY GIGGLES)
1705
01:36:44,434 --> 01:36:46,391
I can't sleep
1706
01:36:47,954 --> 01:36:50,514
Everything I ever knew
1707
01:36:52,034 --> 01:36:54,310
Is a lie
1708
01:36:55,514 --> 01:36:59,667
Without you
1709
01:36:59,794 --> 01:37:01,751
I can't breathe
1710
01:37:03,234 --> 01:37:05,988
When my heart is broke in two
1711
01:37:07,354 --> 01:37:09,266
there's no beat
1712
01:37:10,594 --> 01:37:14,873
Without you
1713
01:37:15,274 --> 01:37:18,904
You're not gone,
but you're not here
1714
01:37:19,034 --> 01:37:22,744
At least that's the way
it seems tonight
1715
01:37:22,874 --> 01:37:26,550
If we could try to end these wars
1716
01:37:26,674 --> 01:37:29,985
I know that we can make it right
1717
01:37:30,114 --> 01:37:32,549
'Cause, baby
1718
01:37:32,674 --> 01:37:35,473
I don't wanna fight no more
1719
01:37:35,594 --> 01:37:39,270
I forgot what we were fighting for
1720
01:37:39,394 --> 01:37:42,910
And this loneliness
that's in my heart
1721
01:37:43,034 --> 01:37:47,711
Won't let me be apart from you
1722
01:37:47,834 --> 01:37:50,474
I don't wanna have to try
1723
01:37:50,594 --> 01:37:54,304
Girl, to live
without you in my life
1724
01:37:54,434 --> 01:37:58,189
So I'm hoping we can start tonight
1725
01:37:58,914 --> 01:38:01,748
'Cause I don't wanna fight
1726
01:38:01,874 --> 01:38:05,185
No more
1727
01:38:09,554 --> 01:38:11,671
How can I leave
1728
01:38:13,114 --> 01:38:15,788
When everything that I adore
1729
01:38:16,834 --> 01:38:20,350
And everything I'm living for
1730
01:38:20,874 --> 01:38:24,470
Girl, it's in you
1731
01:38:24,914 --> 01:38:26,871
I can't dream
1732
01:38:28,234 --> 01:38:31,466
Sleepless nights have got me bad
1733
01:38:31,954 --> 01:38:34,947
the only dream I ever had
1734
01:38:35,714 --> 01:38:39,469
Is being with you
1735
01:38:40,474 --> 01:38:44,024
I know that we can make it right
1736
01:38:44,154 --> 01:38:47,431
It's gonna take a little time
1737
01:38:47,554 --> 01:38:51,787
Let's not leave ourselves
with no way out
1738
01:38:51,914 --> 01:38:55,225
Let's not cross that line
1739
01:38:55,354 --> 01:38:57,630
that line
1740
01:38:57,754 --> 01:39:00,314
I don't wanna fight no more
1741
01:39:00,434 --> 01:39:04,110
I forgot what we were fighting for
1742
01:39:04,234 --> 01:39:07,830
And this loneliness
that's in my heart
1743
01:39:07,954 --> 01:39:12,631
Won't let me be apart from you
1744
01:39:12,754 --> 01:39:15,314
I don't wanna have to try
1745
01:39:15,434 --> 01:39:19,269
Girl, to live
without you in my life
1746
01:39:19,394 --> 01:39:23,434
So I'm hoping we can start tonight
1747
01:39:23,554 --> 01:39:26,752
'Cause I don't wanna fight
1748
01:39:26,874 --> 01:39:30,345
No more
1749
01:39:42,874 --> 01:39:46,504
Remember that I made a vow
1750
01:39:46,634 --> 01:39:49,752
that I would never let you go
1751
01:39:50,354 --> 01:39:53,984
I meant it then, I mean it now
1752
01:39:54,114 --> 01:39:58,313
And I wanna tell you so
1753
01:40:01,714 --> 01:40:04,513
I don't wanna fight no more
1754
01:40:04,634 --> 01:40:08,344
I forgot what we were fighting for
1755
01:40:08,474 --> 01:40:12,673
And this loneliness
that's in my heart
1756
01:40:12,794 --> 01:40:16,947
Won't let me be apart from you
1757
01:40:17,074 --> 01:40:19,669
I don't wanna have to try
1758
01:40:19,794 --> 01:40:23,424
Girl, to live
without you in my life
1759
01:40:23,554 --> 01:40:26,991
So I'm hoping we can start tonight
1760
01:40:27,114 --> 01:40:30,994
'Cause I don't wanna fight
1761
01:40:31,114 --> 01:40:33,026
No more