1 00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:14,438 Lookie! My kite is soaring! It is fl yin! 2 00:00:14,520 --> 00:00:16,318 Flying Tall Princess! 3 00:00:16,400 --> 00:00:19,472 Yeah. Very impressive, your majesty Cow! 4 00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:25,158 Maybe next time you go kite flying you'll graduate to a six foot string. 5 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:30,469 Oh, but I don't know how to fly a kite for real. 6 00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:35,031 Back in Nam when I was with the Hundred and First Kite Flying Division, I... 7 00:00:35,120 --> 00:00:37,236 - You flew military kites? - You flew military kites? 8 00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:39,630 Sure, yeah! 9 00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:42,838 Back in sixty-six in Nam. 10 00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:44,513 Viet Nam? 11 00:00:44,600 --> 00:00:46,557 No. Nam, Wisconsin. 12 00:00:46,640 --> 00:00:48,711 But that's besides the point. 13 00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:51,672 Let's go to the park right now! 14 00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:53,558 And you teach us to fly kites! 15 00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:55,749 All right! 16 00:00:56,520 --> 00:00:57,590 All right y! 17 00:00:57,680 --> 00:01:01,150 We got the string, paper, scissors and tape! 18 00:01:01,240 --> 00:01:03,311 Private Cow awaiting instruction 19 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:06,438 from Kite Master Captain Boneless Chicken, Sir! 20 00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:09,433 Listen, gang. I don't think I can do this. 21 00:01:09,520 --> 00:01:13,150 I mean, I haven't flown a kite since that incident in Nam, 22 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:15,197 on Patty Belt Hill. 23 00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:20,118 My navigator, Joe, and I were flying solo that fateful day. 24 00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:22,919 Boneless, pull up! They're comin' in too low! 25 00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:24,718 Pull up! Pull up! 26 00:01:25,320 --> 00:01:28,073 I never flew a kite again. 27 00:01:28,160 --> 00:01:31,630 But I guess I'm finally over what happened to Joe. 28 00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:33,711 I'm glad you're over it. 29 00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:38,159 Okay, Cow, here's what you do. 30 00:01:38,240 --> 00:01:40,436 Roll out some paper. 31 00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:43,918 Then tape the nostril. 32 00:01:45,560 --> 00:01:47,039 Good, Cow! 33 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:52,991 Now, Chicken, hold the kite and don't let go 'till I say so. 34 00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:54,150 Like this? 35 00:01:54,240 --> 00:01:54,798 Right. 36 00:01:54,880 --> 00:01:55,880 And Cow? 37 00:01:55,960 --> 00:01:59,669 You run like a stupid idiot down the hill. 38 00:02:01,080 --> 00:02:03,071 Is this stupid enough? 39 00:02:10,960 --> 00:02:14,749 Oh, Chicken, you can let go now. 40 00:02:15,480 --> 00:02:18,074 Okay, Cow, new strategy. 41 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:20,993 Run like a pinhead this time. 42 00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:28,155 Oh, goodie! My kite is really flying! 43 00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:35,797 Whose kite is this? 44 00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:39,430 I demand to know who owns this cow kite? 45 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:41,113 And just who are yous? 46 00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:42,520 Who am I? 47 00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:45,752 I am Baron Von Nein Leder Hosen... 48 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:47,956 Kite Flyer Extraordinaire! 49 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:52,113 Now, who's the dead man who owns the cow kite, hmm? 50 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:54,315 Me, Sir. 51 00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:55,992 You? 52 00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:57,991 And who taught you how to fly a kite? 53 00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:01,794 That would be me I guess. 54 00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:02,950 I see. 55 00:03:03,040 --> 00:03:05,156 Do you realize what you have done? 56 00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:07,277 No, of course you don't. 57 00:03:07,360 --> 00:03:09,237 You don't have any bones. 58 00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:11,596 Well, I'll show you! 59 00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:12,795 See that kite up there? 60 00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:17,909 That kite is being flown by the good, good people of Asswipay. 61 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:20,640 Asswipay! Asswipay! 62 00:03:20,720 --> 00:03:25,669 The Asswipay's have challenged me to a mid-air kite duel and tug of war. 63 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:27,990 Their kite was too tangled with my kite, 64 00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:31,789 and fight to the death over the burning waves of the Lava River. 65 00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:33,996 - AssWiPaY! - AssWiPaY! 66 00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:37,835 I ain't never heard of no contest like that before ever. 67 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,354 Oh, sure. 68 00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:42,910 In some parts of the world it's an ancient custom. 69 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:46,880 And we just happen to be in one of those parts of the world. 70 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:48,997 Now, from where I stand, 71 00:03:49,080 --> 00:03:52,311 you owe me a kite, since you destroyed mine! 72 00:03:53,680 --> 00:03:56,718 Let's try you out as a kite, hmm? 73 00:03:57,800 --> 00:04:01,031 No, you're too fat to be a kite. 74 00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:03,637 Let's see if you'll fly! 75 00:04:03,720 --> 00:04:05,996 No! 76 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:08,471 Nope. 77 00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:10,233 How about you? 78 00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:13,438 Now hold on there, fat boy. 79 00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:16,393 I'm soaring. 80 00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:19,438 Oh, Grandma, I'm soaring! 81 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:23,480 Oh, great. 82 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:27,838 My one chance to fly and I run into a dragon kite 83 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:31,197 flown by a bunch of Asswipay people. 84 00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:34,272 Asswipay! Asswipay! 85 00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:42,039 Hot boiling lava? 86 00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:43,789 Boneless? 87 00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:51,749 Help me! 88 00:04:51,840 --> 00:04:54,753 Oh, Big Brother, we've got to help Boneless Chicken 89 00:04:54,840 --> 00:04:59,277 before he gets burned to a crisp in the molten hot Lava River! 90 00:04:59,360 --> 00:05:02,876 Mommy, Grandma's lookin' at me again. 91 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:06,231 All right, Cow, let's go join the Asswipay's! 92 00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:09,910 Hang in there Cousin Boneless! 93 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:12,674 We are coming to save you! 94 00:05:13,200 --> 00:05:18,115 I got the joy, joy, joy down in my heart. 95 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,438 Asswi pay'! 96 00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:22,875 Hot boiling molten lava! 97 00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:27,237 Oh, the agony! 98 00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:29,118 Oh, the agony. 99 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:31,793 This is kinda nice. 100 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:35,518 It's really like lukewarm lava. 101 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:42,480 Oh, I got the lava lovin' fool, the sight of lava makes me drool. 102 00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:46,433 Oh, sorry about the kite thing today. 103 00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:48,477 And that pantless guy. 104 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:50,437 Hope you weren't hurt. 105 00:05:50,520 --> 00:05:54,150 Well, at least you didn't get me any broken bones. 106 00:05:55,680 --> 00:05:57,353 It's a joke, Cow! 107 00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,113 I'm Boneless Chicken! 108 00:05:59,200 --> 00:06:01,669 Got no bones to break! 109 00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:07,314 Oh, cousin Boneless! 110 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:11,917 You are the best cousin a cow could ever have. 111 00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,360 Hey, kids! 112 00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:18,193 Did I ever tell you about the time I was champ... 113 00:06:18,280 --> 00:06:22,069 of the Boneless Bowling League back in eighty-four? 114 00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:27,909 No! No! Really, that wasn't a joke! 115 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:32,872 What is wrong with you kids? 116 00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:38,910 You must be this tall to ride. 117 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:41,196 Ah, dang! I'm too short! 118 00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:47,314 This is great! Right, Chicken? 119 00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:52,989 Yeah, great! I'm havin' the time of my life! 120 00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:59,594 You don't need pants for the victory dance, 121 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:02,149 'cause Baboon's better than Weasel. 122 00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:05,039 I.R. Baboon's a big star cartoon. 123 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:06,959 I. M. Weasel! 124 00:07:11,600 --> 00:07:14,399 I.R. Baboon reigns king of his line, 125 00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:16,790 he's just a baboon with a wiggle behind. 126 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:19,872 But round every comer he's likely to find... 127 00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:22,355 I. M. Weasel! 128 00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:24,433 I. M. Weasel! 129 00:07:36,440 --> 00:07:37,874 Greetings Weasel fans! 130 00:07:37,960 --> 00:07:41,715 This is Dick Pickle reporting to you live from the Hollywood Bowl, 131 00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:45,634 where a sold out crowd will soon be privileged to witness a lovely 132 00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:52,399 soul stirring virtuoso harp concerto by the one, the only, |.M. Weasel. 133 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:55,032 Oh, he's so... so fabulous! 134 00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:58,158 LR. Better music man than Weasel! 135 00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:03,635 LR. Can play harp, too! 136 00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:08,351 LR. Can play anything! 137 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:21,280 Weasel! Weasel! Weasel! Weasel...! 138 00:08:21,800 --> 00:08:24,155 Ladies and Germans! 139 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:28,632 Give it up for |.M. Weasel! 140 00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:33,791 Weasel! I love you! 141 00:08:36,760 --> 00:08:40,913 How dare they treating LR. Like spotted ape. 142 00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:43,077 Come on, boy. 143 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:46,037 Good doggie. 144 00:08:52,720 --> 00:08:54,757 My beauty! 145 00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:58,280 Free at last! 146 00:08:58,360 --> 00:09:02,718 Did you miss me, stuck in your sweaty case all day? 147 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:04,154 Nothin' up my sleeve. 148 00:09:04,240 --> 00:09:05,799 Nothin' up my pants. 149 00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:07,154 Presto! 150 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:17,119 LR. Have question, Mr. Pantless Man who cannot see. 151 00:09:17,480 --> 00:09:19,437 Oh, I see just fine. 152 00:09:19,520 --> 00:09:21,352 It's these black opaque glasses! 153 00:09:21,440 --> 00:09:23,511 Can't see a darn thing through 'em. 154 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,432 But they were on sale. 155 00:09:25,880 --> 00:09:27,109 What are that? 156 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:28,709 What's the matter? 157 00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:31,519 Can't you see? It's a Theraman! 158 00:09:31,600 --> 00:09:36,071 The Theraman is the greatest instrument since the probe. 159 00:09:36,160 --> 00:09:41,917 When you play the Theraman, you play with the juice of life itself! 160 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:44,799 Electricity! 161 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:47,991 Silence, por favor! 162 00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:57,273 Shut your pie holes! 163 00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:25,679 A-B-C-D-E-F-G, H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O-P... 164 00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:33,110 Pop, goes the Weasel! 165 00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:36,158 Q-R-S—T-U-V... 166 00:10:36,240 --> 00:10:38,390 You don't need pants for the victory dance, 167 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:40,596 'cause Baboon's better than Weasel. 168 00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:42,956 I.R. Baboon's a big star of cartoon... 169 00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:45,634 Explode goes the Weasel! 170 00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,556 I.R. Baboon reigns king in his mind... 171 00:10:49,640 --> 00:10:51,836 he's just as good as the weaely kind. 172 00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:55,834 But round every comer he's likely to find... 173 00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:57,149 Explode! 174 00:10:59,240 --> 00:11:02,198 W—X—Y AND Z. 175 00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:04,794 Now I know my A-B-C'S... 176 00:11:04,880 --> 00:11:07,474 Tell me what you think of me! 177 00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:14,029 A-B-C-D-F-B-I, G-I-C-U, B-V-D-D-D. 178 00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:20,392 I-R-B-AND-A-R-V... W-X-Y-AND-ZEND. 179 00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:23,438 Now I know my A-B-C'S... 180 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:27,593 Tell me what you think of me. 181 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,919 LR. Better music man than Weasel! 182 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:37,038 LR. Have magic box! 183 00:11:37,120 --> 00:11:39,999 The Theraman is without a doubt a virtuoso instrument. 184 00:11:40,080 --> 00:11:43,835 However, the harps melodic tone is more suited to this piece. 185 00:11:48,520 --> 00:11:50,875 - A-B-C-D-E-F-G... - /-c-u... 186 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,836 H—I—J—K... U-R-C-ME-TOO. 187 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:55,277 Q-R-S... C-I-A... W-X... J-F-K... 188 00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:56,680 Now I know my A-B-C's... 189 00:11:56,760 --> 00:12:00,674 Next time you won't sing with me. 190 00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:05,674 A-B-C-D-E-F-G, H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O-P... 191 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:08,036 A-B-C-D-F-B-I, G-I-C-U-B-V-D-D-D. 192 00:12:08,120 --> 00:12:10,555 I-R-B-AND-A-R-B, DO-RO-ME-AND-L-A-G. 193 00:12:10,640 --> 00:12:13,473 Now I know my A-B-C's, Tell me what you think of me. 194 00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:16,674 Oh, no! An earthquake! 195 00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:21,679 It seems the frequency of the Theraman is reverberating down 196 00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:23,034 to the San Andreas Fault. 197 00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:26,033 The vibrations are going to cause a cataclysmic earthquake. 198 00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:27,633 The big one! 199 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:28,720 |.R.! 200 00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:31,957 You must turn down the volume at once! 201 00:12:32,160 --> 00:12:34,197 Weasel jealous of |.R.! 202 00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:37,910 LR. Make better music than Weasel! 203 00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:42,751 |.R.! Stop the music! 204 00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:51,591 Magic box! I thought you dead. 205 00:12:52,440 --> 00:12:54,397 |.R., are you injured? 206 00:12:54,480 --> 00:12:56,756 Wait! Put the box down! 207 00:12:56,960 --> 00:12:57,791 Oh, don't! 208 00:12:57,880 --> 00:12:59,678 You'll cause another earthquake! 209 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:06,149 |.R., no! 210 00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:22,314 |.R. Baboon? 211 00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:23,989 Give me your hand! 212 00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:27,471 LR. Not leaving without magic box. 213 00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:32,511 Don't be a fool, man! 214 00:13:37,960 --> 00:13:39,234 What a waste. 215 00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:43,075 He was a Theraman virtuoso and a good monkey. 216 00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:51,076 Let us pause for a moment of silence.