1
00:00:01,669 --> 00:00:03,737
JESS:
Thanks for helping me
with my school dance.

2
00:00:06,873 --> 00:00:08,342
"Love is forever...

3
00:00:08,375 --> 00:00:10,510
and ever... and ever..."

4
00:00:10,544 --> 00:00:12,813
How many "and evers"?

5
00:00:12,846 --> 00:00:14,082
Technically, infinity,

6
00:00:14,115 --> 00:00:16,684
but I could only fit 12.

7
00:00:18,452 --> 00:00:20,388
Wow, this is gonna
be tough for you, huh?

8
00:00:20,420 --> 00:00:22,422
Yes. Foster said we
couldn't afford it,

9
00:00:22,455 --> 00:00:24,192
but I really stuck
my neck out for this dance.

10
00:00:24,225 --> 00:00:25,425
No, I...
I mean

11
00:00:25,458 --> 00:00:27,260
because the theme
of the dance is

12
00:00:27,295 --> 00:00:29,062
"Love is Forever,"
and...

13
00:00:29,097 --> 00:00:31,231
Nick, and the breakup...

14
00:00:31,265 --> 00:00:32,899
What? No. Cece, look.

15
00:00:32,932 --> 00:00:34,734
You remember what school dances
were like for me.

16
00:00:34,768 --> 00:00:36,770
They were miserable.
I was just waiting
in the bathroom

17
00:00:36,804 --> 00:00:39,606
for Tim Keymaker to magically
appear and ask me out.

18
00:00:39,640 --> 00:00:41,008
I remember.

19
00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:42,509
I was smoking
in the stall next to you.

20
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:44,112
We get it;
you were bad.

21
00:00:44,145 --> 00:00:47,014
I just don't want it to
be like it was for me.

22
00:00:47,046 --> 00:00:48,682
I want them to have
an incredible time.

23
00:00:48,716 --> 00:00:51,351
My life is a bit of
a mess right now, but

24
00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:52,920
the one thing I can do

25
00:00:52,953 --> 00:00:55,088
is throw an amazing
dance for them.
(door opens)

26
00:00:55,122 --> 00:00:57,057
"Love is forever
and ever...

27
00:00:57,091 --> 00:00:58,292
and ever."

28
00:00:58,326 --> 00:00:59,593
What is, what is this?

29
00:00:59,627 --> 00:01:01,728
The theme of Jess' school dance.

30
00:01:01,762 --> 00:01:03,597
That's pretty
ironic, huh?
Jess, you poor thing.

31
00:01:03,631 --> 00:01:04,864
Come-come here.
Come here.
What?

32
00:01:04,897 --> 00:01:06,099
JESS:
What?

33
00:01:06,134 --> 00:01:07,301
Just... there.

34
00:01:07,334 --> 00:01:08,536
What are you doing?
All right.

35
00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:10,870
Uh-huh.
Okay.

36
00:01:10,903 --> 00:01:12,406
Oh, I know.
I know.

37
00:01:12,439 --> 00:01:14,608
I know.
What's happening?

38
00:01:14,641 --> 00:01:16,477
I got hug number two
locked and loaded.

39
00:01:16,510 --> 00:01:18,646
Soft or hard,
it's up to you.

40
00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:20,147
I know.
Schmidt...

41
00:01:20,180 --> 00:01:22,081
* Who's that girl?

42
00:01:22,115 --> 00:01:25,986
* Who's that girl? *
* It's Jess.

43
00:01:30,524 --> 00:01:32,393
Ay-ay-ay,
I needed a shvitz.

44
00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:33,593
Ech, me, too.

45
00:01:33,627 --> 00:01:34,895
My arms are so sore.

46
00:01:34,927 --> 00:01:35,996
I've been doing
so many push-ups.

47
00:01:36,028 --> 00:01:37,631
That seems
like a lie.

48
00:01:37,664 --> 00:01:39,400
No, I'm trying to stay fit
after the breakup.

49
00:01:39,432 --> 00:01:40,734
I've been eating salads.

50
00:01:40,768 --> 00:01:42,135
You know, no dressing.

51
00:01:42,170 --> 00:01:43,670
Mostly just the protein.

52
00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:45,072
What kind of salads
you been eating?

53
00:01:45,104 --> 00:01:46,274
The little chopped-up

54
00:01:46,307 --> 00:01:47,908
pieces of ham.
Just the ham?

55
00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:49,643
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.

56
00:01:49,676 --> 00:01:51,611
I don't like the lettuce.
I think it's gross to eat stuff

57
00:01:51,645 --> 00:01:53,180
that already... it's green.
Well, look, you know,
baby steps.

58
00:01:53,213 --> 00:01:54,581
It's not baby steps.

59
00:01:54,615 --> 00:01:55,649
There are some pretty
big pieces of ham.

60
00:01:55,682 --> 00:01:57,185
Okay.
It's... you know,
it's good.

61
00:01:57,218 --> 00:01:59,853
I-I genuinely miss
goofing around with Jess.

62
00:01:59,887 --> 00:02:02,088
Breakups aren't
supposed to be easy, so...

63
00:02:02,121 --> 00:02:04,257
Wow, that's really
mature of you, man.

64
00:02:04,292 --> 00:02:05,659
We're doing something
where we're...

65
00:02:05,692 --> 00:02:07,328
we're not allowed to be
in a room alone

66
00:02:07,361 --> 00:02:09,462
together without Winston.
Mm.

67
00:02:09,497 --> 00:02:10,531
'Cause he just naturally
takes the sexual tension

68
00:02:10,563 --> 00:02:11,865
out of a room.

69
00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:16,770
What'd you guys want?

70
00:02:16,804 --> 00:02:18,472
You see? I'm proud of you.

71
00:02:18,506 --> 00:02:20,007
That's what I'm talking about.
We're men.

72
00:02:20,039 --> 00:02:21,275
We've felt pain,
we've survived it.

73
00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:22,810
Look at me.

74
00:02:22,842 --> 00:02:24,277
I'm watching Cece drool
over some 20-year-old.

75
00:02:24,312 --> 00:02:26,379
How could she be
interested in a boy

76
00:02:26,413 --> 00:02:27,881
when she could have
these ripe berries?

77
00:02:27,914 --> 00:02:29,216
Look at these,
Nick.

78
00:02:29,250 --> 00:02:30,484
Put your towel down.

79
00:02:30,518 --> 00:02:32,719
Oh, God, I need a shvitz.

80
00:02:32,752 --> 00:02:35,288
Why does my sweat
smell like asparagus?

81
00:02:35,323 --> 00:02:37,290
He does take all the sexual
tension out of a room.

82
00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:39,293
Man, I heat up every room
I walk into.

83
00:02:39,326 --> 00:02:40,793
Put me next to a dozen eggs.

84
00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:42,229
They hatchin'.
You know why?

85
00:02:42,263 --> 00:02:43,997
'Cause I got the heat
of a mother hen.

86
00:02:44,031 --> 00:02:45,832
There was no sexual tension
in here before he got here.

87
00:02:45,865 --> 00:02:47,099
Keep telling yourself that,
Nick.

88
00:02:48,336 --> 00:02:50,002
Congrats, chaperones!

89
00:02:50,037 --> 00:02:51,405
With your help,
tonight is going to be...

90
00:02:51,438 --> 00:02:52,706
unforgettable.

91
00:02:52,740 --> 00:02:54,074
I didn't sign
up for this.

92
00:02:54,106 --> 00:02:55,975
No, you didn't.
None of you did.

93
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:57,645
In fact, none of you
have ever, ever

94
00:02:57,677 --> 00:02:59,712
signed up for
any school event, ever.

95
00:02:59,747 --> 00:03:02,415
Which means
you've never felt the joy

96
00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:03,817
of exchanging your free time

97
00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:05,485
for a child's smile.

98
00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:08,021
I never volunteer because
of my Munchausen syndrome.

99
00:03:08,055 --> 00:03:09,223
Are we getting paid?

100
00:03:09,257 --> 00:03:10,258
You will get paid,
um, actually,

101
00:03:10,290 --> 00:03:13,260
in attractive hats
that I made.

102
00:03:13,294 --> 00:03:15,362
They say "chaperone."

103
00:03:15,396 --> 00:03:16,364
(chuckles)

104
00:03:16,396 --> 00:03:17,497
And Gary the Janitor has one

105
00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:18,566
that says "clean up crew."

106
00:03:18,598 --> 00:03:20,199
You call me
Gary the Janitor

107
00:03:20,234 --> 00:03:22,102
as if me being
a janitor

108
00:03:22,134 --> 00:03:23,437
is my whole
identity.

109
00:03:23,471 --> 00:03:24,937
It's like someone
calling you

110
00:03:24,972 --> 00:03:27,540
Jess the Third-Hottest
White Teacher.

111
00:03:27,574 --> 00:03:28,575
Okay.

112
00:03:28,609 --> 00:03:29,543
Are we done?

113
00:03:29,576 --> 00:03:30,443
I'm gonna say
we're done.

114
00:03:30,478 --> 00:03:32,246
Yeah.
Okay.

115
00:03:32,280 --> 00:03:34,247
(bell ringing)
Thank-thanks, guys.
Good-good meeting.

116
00:03:34,281 --> 00:03:35,949
BIOLOGY TEACHER:
I don't know where
I'm supposed to be right now.

117
00:03:35,983 --> 00:03:37,251
Thanks, guys.

118
00:03:37,284 --> 00:03:39,218
It's gonna
be great!

119
00:03:39,252 --> 00:03:41,389
You don't have to
wear that, Coach.

120
00:03:41,421 --> 00:03:42,622
As far as
I'm concerned,

121
00:03:42,656 --> 00:03:43,956
this dance
starts now.

122
00:03:43,990 --> 00:03:45,859
I know how important
this dance is to you.

123
00:03:45,893 --> 00:03:47,694
Those kids won't get
away with anything.

124
00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:49,028
If they want to bang,

125
00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:50,563
they're gonna have
to bang through me.

126
00:03:50,598 --> 00:03:51,764
Wait.

127
00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:53,866
If they want to bang,

128
00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:55,902
they're gonna have
to bang through me!

129
00:03:55,936 --> 00:03:57,437
Wait.

130
00:03:58,305 --> 00:03:59,906
Hey, Wendy.

131
00:04:00,941 --> 00:04:02,310
Whoa!

132
00:04:02,342 --> 00:04:05,177
That shirt's
scary! Whoa.

133
00:04:07,615 --> 00:04:08,882
You going to the
dance tonight?

134
00:04:08,915 --> 00:04:10,116
My mom's making me go.

135
00:04:10,150 --> 00:04:11,318
Making you go

136
00:04:11,352 --> 00:04:12,919
to the best night
of your life?

137
00:04:12,953 --> 00:04:14,722
Your mom sounds
really cool.

138
00:04:14,754 --> 00:04:17,925
Come one, at your age, love
is forever and ever and ever.

139
00:04:17,957 --> 00:04:19,259
(laughs softly)

140
00:04:19,293 --> 00:04:20,494
What are you
gonna wear?

141
00:04:20,528 --> 00:04:21,562
This shirt.

142
00:04:21,595 --> 00:04:22,629
Oh.

143
00:04:22,663 --> 00:04:23,896
Oh!

144
00:04:23,930 --> 00:04:25,231
That is

145
00:04:25,264 --> 00:04:27,935
the best idea I've
heard all week.

146
00:04:28,668 --> 00:04:31,071
Whoa!
Scary shirt!

147
00:04:31,103 --> 00:04:32,505
We all think that
you're an idiot

148
00:04:32,540 --> 00:04:33,807
for dating this
14-year-old.

149
00:04:33,841 --> 00:04:35,108
(laughs)
He's 20.

150
00:04:35,141 --> 00:04:36,409
That means he was seven

151
00:04:36,444 --> 00:04:37,677
when Good Will Hunting came out.

152
00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:39,312
Seven, Cece.
Good Will Hunting.

153
00:04:39,346 --> 00:04:40,980
You know what?
Let me go, let me go, let me go.

154
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:42,949
Um, check this out.
Cece's boyfriend

155
00:04:42,983 --> 00:04:46,519
is so young that...

156
00:04:46,553 --> 00:04:48,689
(laughing):
It'll come back to me.

157
00:04:48,721 --> 00:04:50,290
Buster is more of a man
than all of you.

158
00:04:50,324 --> 00:04:52,492
Okay? He's been to,
like, 40 countries,

159
00:04:52,526 --> 00:04:53,860
he builds boats,

160
00:04:53,894 --> 00:04:55,629
he used to train snakes
with his uncle.

161
00:04:55,663 --> 00:04:57,096
Earning a respectable wage,

162
00:04:57,129 --> 00:04:59,332
wearing a proper-hanging
pair of slacks,

163
00:04:59,367 --> 00:05:01,802
ordering sushi
like a sick-ass boss...

164
00:05:01,834 --> 00:05:04,036
these things a man maketh.
So stupid stuff

165
00:05:04,071 --> 00:05:05,838
that you do.
I know that technically

166
00:05:05,872 --> 00:05:09,309
you guys are men, but all you do
is hang out with each other,

167
00:05:09,343 --> 00:05:12,012
like you're 12.
What do you know?
You're just a stupid girl.

168
00:05:12,045 --> 00:05:13,947
(laughter)
WINSTON:
Okay, I got it, I got it.

169
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:17,016
Okay, Cece's boyfriend
is so young that...

170
00:05:17,050 --> 00:05:19,552
How-how young is he?
'Cause everybody wants to know.
Winston.

171
00:05:19,586 --> 00:05:21,689
It's not working, man.
I'm serious.

172
00:05:21,721 --> 00:05:24,524
I'm at my wit's
end with you.
Mm. What?

173
00:05:24,557 --> 00:05:25,992
Wait a minute.

174
00:05:26,026 --> 00:05:27,728
Why's the door locked?

175
00:05:27,761 --> 00:05:29,396
The dance starts
in five minutes.

176
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:31,399
ROSE: Okay.
JESS: Gary!

177
00:05:31,432 --> 00:05:33,332
Thank God you're here.
Can you unlock the door?

178
00:05:33,367 --> 00:05:35,168
No. I didn't put that there.

179
00:05:35,201 --> 00:05:36,302
What?

180
00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:37,704
Who else could
have done it?

181
00:05:37,737 --> 00:05:38,906
We can't start the dance

182
00:05:38,939 --> 00:05:40,206
if the door's locked.

183
00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:42,074
Don't tell me
I wore my raw denim

184
00:05:42,108 --> 00:05:44,845
for no reason--
don't you dare tell me that!

185
00:05:44,877 --> 00:05:45,978
I am not telling
you that.

186
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:47,314
So the dance is cancelled, then?

187
00:05:47,346 --> 00:05:48,581
No, no, no.
There is gonna be a dance.

188
00:05:48,615 --> 00:05:49,750
It's gonna be
great and perfect

189
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:50,918
and lovely and it will celebrate

190
00:05:50,951 --> 00:05:52,351
love is forever
and ever and ever.

191
00:05:52,386 --> 00:05:53,487
Where are you guys going?

192
00:05:53,521 --> 00:05:55,389
In life, nowhere.

193
00:05:55,423 --> 00:05:57,591
But I know
I don't want to be here.

194
00:05:57,625 --> 00:06:00,528
Guys, please stay. It would
really mean a lot to me.

195
00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:01,894
Boring.

196
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,264
It's Jess. All of her
chaperones just bailed,

197
00:06:05,298 --> 00:06:06,699
and she needs help.

198
00:06:06,733 --> 00:06:07,767
A lady needs help?

199
00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:09,769
Is that a job
for... a boy

200
00:06:09,802 --> 00:06:10,771
No.
or a...

201
00:06:10,803 --> 00:06:12,172
Man!
man?

202
00:06:12,204 --> 00:06:14,574
SCHMIDT/NICK/WINSTON:
Men! Men! Men!

203
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:17,545
Men! Men! Men! Men! Men!

204
00:06:17,577 --> 00:06:18,879
Well, the dummy patrol is ready.

205
00:06:18,911 --> 00:06:20,680
Men! Men!
Men! Aah!

206
00:06:20,713 --> 00:06:22,415
Men. Man!

207
00:06:22,449 --> 00:06:24,785
So stupid.
Seriously,
are you okay for real?

208
00:06:24,817 --> 00:06:27,053
You got any ice?
Dude, rub his shoulder.
Rub his shoulder.

209
00:06:27,086 --> 00:06:29,055
I'll get ice. I'll get ice.
...my shoulder go into his.
You all right?

210
00:06:29,088 --> 00:06:31,124
Ow, man!
Okay, all right,
just sit back.

211
00:06:31,158 --> 00:06:32,759
(loud groaning)
Nick, get the ice!

212
00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:38,365
How do you know how to do that?
Well, a tire iron is

213
00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:41,100
actually strong enough to
break through a high-carbon
steel steering wheel lock,

214
00:06:41,134 --> 00:06:43,069
so, you know, I figured
I'd work with this.

215
00:06:43,103 --> 00:06:44,538
(quietly):
Cece scares me sometimes.

216
00:06:44,572 --> 00:06:46,139
It's just the tip
of the iceberg, my friend.

217
00:06:46,173 --> 00:06:48,608
Got it. There we go.
Oh! Yes!

218
00:06:48,641 --> 00:06:50,877
Now we're cooking with gas.
Yes!

219
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,480
JESS:
Everything's
back on track, guys!

220
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:55,449
This bike lock was
a real punk move.

221
00:06:55,483 --> 00:06:58,218
Seems like there's
a lot of punks here.
Did you do this?

222
00:06:58,250 --> 00:07:01,288
Hey. Did you do this?
Huh? Did you do this?
COACH: Hey, easy, easy.

223
00:07:01,321 --> 00:07:03,089
If anyone's messing
with this dance, it's one

224
00:07:03,122 --> 00:07:05,459
of those teachers-- those hats
were begging for payback.

225
00:07:05,492 --> 00:07:06,459
Let's do this.
Hey.

226
00:07:06,494 --> 00:07:08,394
Listen up, chaperones.

227
00:07:08,427 --> 00:07:09,930
You will obey all
of my instructions.

228
00:07:09,963 --> 00:07:11,999
This means
everything to Jess.

229
00:07:12,031 --> 00:07:13,934
Your asses belong to me now.

230
00:07:13,966 --> 00:07:15,603
Which means I currently have

231
00:07:15,636 --> 00:07:17,103
four asses.

232
00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:19,639
The three of yours and mine.

233
00:07:19,673 --> 00:07:20,908
I think we're capable
of handling

234
00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:22,843
a bunch of prepubescent kids.

235
00:07:22,875 --> 00:07:24,778
Do you think you
are tough, Winston?

236
00:07:24,812 --> 00:07:25,745
You have no idea

237
00:07:25,778 --> 00:07:27,180
what these little bastards

238
00:07:27,213 --> 00:07:28,348
are capable of.

239
00:07:28,380 --> 00:07:29,483
I mean, I love them.

240
00:07:29,516 --> 00:07:30,983
I love them with all my heart.

241
00:07:31,018 --> 00:07:34,754
But they will hurt
your feelings sometimes.

242
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:36,689
SCHMIDT:
He's right.

243
00:07:36,723 --> 00:07:38,959
I remember sticks and stones
may break your bones,

244
00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:41,995
but not if you're a fat kid
with calcium deficiency.

245
00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:45,031
Schmidt, you're on snack table
duty. Keep the chip bowls full.

246
00:07:45,064 --> 00:07:46,466
Don't let the kids
spike the punch.

247
00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:47,701
And make sure Diabetic Amy

248
00:07:47,735 --> 00:07:49,702
only has four cookies.

249
00:07:49,737 --> 00:07:52,639
Diabetic Amy ain't gonna get
no cookies on my watch.

250
00:07:52,673 --> 00:07:54,841
No, she-she has to have
at least two or she'll pass out.

251
00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:56,475
She's getting nothing
as far as I'm concerned.

252
00:07:56,509 --> 00:07:58,612
At least two, at least two
or she'll pass out.

253
00:07:58,646 --> 00:08:01,314
All right, Winston?
Dance floor duty.
Yes, sir.

254
00:08:01,348 --> 00:08:03,315
Ooh, you shouldn't have
said that, man, that is

255
00:08:03,350 --> 00:08:04,552
the perfect place for me
right now. I got

256
00:08:04,584 --> 00:08:05,819
so much heat coming off me, man.
No.

257
00:08:05,853 --> 00:08:07,521
No, no, no, no,
no, no. No heat.

258
00:08:07,555 --> 00:08:09,055
Ooh, ooh, ooh.
No heat. Hey,
hey, hey.

259
00:08:09,088 --> 00:08:11,024
None. Hey, look
at me. No heat.

260
00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:14,161
The opposite of heat.
Six inches separation
at all times.

261
00:08:14,194 --> 00:08:16,362
Nobody's getting
pregnant tonight.

262
00:08:16,396 --> 00:08:18,365
That's the same thing
I say on my dates.

263
00:08:18,398 --> 00:08:21,201
(whoops)
Not cool.

264
00:08:22,235 --> 00:08:24,370
Let's hit it.
Hey, hey.

265
00:08:24,403 --> 00:08:26,072
Saving the best for last?

266
00:08:26,105 --> 00:08:27,540
Oh, I'm sorry, Nick, uh,

267
00:08:27,574 --> 00:08:29,009
you're not chaperone material.

268
00:08:29,042 --> 00:08:31,077
I've been at this job
for a few weeks now

269
00:08:31,110 --> 00:08:33,046
and I know the stink
of a bad kid.

270
00:08:33,080 --> 00:08:35,749
That makes me the perfect
candidate to be a chaperone,

271
00:08:35,783 --> 00:08:37,183
Coach. Just think about it.

272
00:08:37,216 --> 00:08:39,852
I can get in the mind
of a bad kid.

273
00:08:39,886 --> 00:08:42,522
Think like 'em. I can go deep.
I can go too deep.

274
00:08:42,556 --> 00:08:44,725
I'm gonna put you in the parking
lot to sweep for stragglers.

275
00:08:44,758 --> 00:08:47,126
You want me on the streets.
It's not that
important of a job.

276
00:08:48,961 --> 00:08:50,998
I won't let you down.

277
00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:53,133
I'm not gonna let you down!

278
00:08:55,568 --> 00:08:58,138
You taking a...
a break right now?

279
00:08:59,639 --> 00:09:02,274
* The fall,
you gave me nothing at all *

280
00:09:02,308 --> 00:09:04,510
* But still you're in my way

281
00:09:04,543 --> 00:09:06,413
* I beg and borrow and steal

282
00:09:06,446 --> 00:09:08,081
* At first sight and it's real

283
00:09:08,115 --> 00:09:10,082
* I didn't know
I would feel it *

284
00:09:10,116 --> 00:09:11,684
When the heat moves you,
you got to move...

285
00:09:11,719 --> 00:09:13,120
Okay, no heat. No heat.

286
00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:14,955
No heat, Bishop, no heat.

287
00:09:14,988 --> 00:09:16,556
Keep that heat locked up.
(chuckles)

288
00:09:16,590 --> 00:09:18,457
Keep that heat...

289
00:09:18,490 --> 00:09:20,793
* Think you're going, baby

290
00:09:20,827 --> 00:09:22,962
* I, this is... (mumbles)

291
00:09:22,995 --> 00:09:24,364
* Crazy

292
00:09:24,397 --> 00:09:25,932
Put that heat away, Bishop.

293
00:09:25,966 --> 00:09:28,434
Huh? Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
You got that, man.

294
00:09:28,467 --> 00:09:29,903
You got...

295
00:09:31,171 --> 00:09:32,605
What are you looking at?

296
00:09:32,639 --> 00:09:35,107
Cool mustache.

297
00:09:35,142 --> 00:09:36,308
(short laugh)

298
00:09:36,342 --> 00:09:38,544
Too much heat.
(laughs)

299
00:09:38,577 --> 00:09:40,580
Too much
heat.

300
00:09:40,614 --> 00:09:42,716
All right, kids,
let's use the serving tongs.

301
00:09:42,750 --> 00:09:44,250
This isn't Appalachia.

302
00:09:44,283 --> 00:09:47,486
Hurry up, everybody,
before Justin eats everything.

303
00:09:49,588 --> 00:09:50,957
Son, I...

304
00:09:50,990 --> 00:09:52,125
don't think you
meant to hurt

305
00:09:52,158 --> 00:09:53,927
Justin's feelings, there.

306
00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:56,096
What's going on, really?

307
00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:58,130
Are the parents
fighting at home?
(scoffs)

308
00:09:58,164 --> 00:09:59,298
Leave me alone, flamer.

309
00:09:59,331 --> 00:10:01,433
Flamer?

310
00:10:01,467 --> 00:10:02,903
You're the... You're
the flamer, pal.

311
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:04,971
You're the flamer.
You're the flamer.

312
00:10:05,004 --> 00:10:06,940
Flamer.
Stop saying that
word, it's prob...

313
00:10:06,974 --> 00:10:08,642
probably offensive to
some people, you flamer.
Flamer, flamer.

314
00:10:08,676 --> 00:10:10,442
Yeah, take a doughnut,
there, you flamer.
Flamer.

315
00:10:10,476 --> 00:10:13,013
Schmidt. I got a bit
of a situation here.

316
00:10:13,046 --> 00:10:15,682
Um, thoughts? Advice?

317
00:10:15,716 --> 00:10:17,116
JESS:
What now?

318
00:10:17,149 --> 00:10:20,687
Aw, son of a b... penis.

319
00:10:20,721 --> 00:10:22,522
Ah, that wasn't better.

320
00:10:22,554 --> 00:10:24,291
Sorry, everyone.

321
00:10:24,323 --> 00:10:25,958
You were right.

322
00:10:25,993 --> 00:10:28,427
Someone's trying
to mess with my dance.

323
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,831
Hmm. (sniffs)
It's paste.

324
00:10:30,864 --> 00:10:32,198
And it's fresh.

325
00:10:32,231 --> 00:10:36,369
(humming a tune)

326
00:10:36,403 --> 00:10:39,405
* Banana in the dark.

327
00:10:41,908 --> 00:10:43,976
Uh-oh.

328
00:10:44,010 --> 00:10:45,445
You ruined my dance.

329
00:10:45,477 --> 00:10:47,580
I can smell the paste.
Perpetrator.

330
00:10:51,384 --> 00:10:52,985
(whispering):
He's in there.
Oh.

331
00:10:53,019 --> 00:10:54,955
Okay, when we get in there,

332
00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:57,224
I'm going to be good cop,
you be bad cop, okay?

333
00:10:57,256 --> 00:11:00,126
Got it.

334
00:11:00,159 --> 00:11:01,528
There are two ways
this can go.

335
00:11:01,561 --> 00:11:02,863
Number one:

336
00:11:02,895 --> 00:11:05,298
you tell us why you
ruined the dance.

337
00:11:05,331 --> 00:11:09,535
Number two: I bash your
skull in with a carburetor!

338
00:11:09,568 --> 00:11:10,903
(whimpers)

339
00:11:10,937 --> 00:11:13,005
I thought I was bad cop.
You are the bad cop.

340
00:11:13,039 --> 00:11:16,076
I'm the tough, competent
cop, who's good at her job,

341
00:11:16,109 --> 00:11:18,345
you're the kind of
fumbly, dumb cop who's...

342
00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:20,713
who's nice and...
Yeah, that's not how
it works, though. I mean,

343
00:11:20,748 --> 00:11:22,381
the good cop is nice and
the bad cop is mean.

344
00:11:22,414 --> 00:11:24,317
That would be nice
cop, mean cop.
That's how it works

345
00:11:24,350 --> 00:11:27,354
on every cop show,
when you watch it.
I watch cop shows.

346
00:11:27,386 --> 00:11:29,088
You need to pay more attention.
I do pay attention...

347
00:11:29,121 --> 00:11:32,860
What do you awful women want?
We want to know...

348
00:11:32,893 --> 00:11:36,764
why you locked the door and
poured glue in the breaker.

349
00:11:36,797 --> 00:11:38,264
I didn't do any of that.

350
00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:40,933
Why would anybody

351
00:11:40,967 --> 00:11:43,003
want to ruin such
a magical night?

352
00:11:43,036 --> 00:11:46,538
Uh, you're the only one
who wanted to have
this stupid dance.

353
00:11:46,572 --> 00:11:48,240
Revenge would be
my guess.

354
00:11:49,076 --> 00:11:50,710
What do you know?

355
00:11:50,744 --> 00:11:53,446
Well, you have the grip
of a much taller woman.

356
00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:56,750
(whispers):
And I don't not like that.

357
00:11:56,783 --> 00:11:58,150
Ugh.

358
00:11:59,251 --> 00:12:01,855
(whistles)

359
00:12:01,889 --> 00:12:03,090
...some fireworks
or something.

360
00:12:04,924 --> 00:12:06,359
What's up, gentlemen?

361
00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:08,195
Just hanging out
outside in the parking lot?

362
00:12:08,227 --> 00:12:10,263
We're not doing anything.
We don't need a chaperone.

363
00:12:10,297 --> 00:12:12,932
(laughs)
Calling me a 'rone?

364
00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:16,769
I'm not a 'rone. I'm basically
the same guy as you.

365
00:12:16,803 --> 00:12:18,938
We're wearing
the same shirt.

366
00:12:18,971 --> 00:12:21,975
I'm a good guy,
I'm having fun. I'm just...

367
00:12:22,009 --> 00:12:23,943
I'm bored in there,
I'm looking to hang out.

368
00:12:23,976 --> 00:12:25,846
Is that a crime, officers?

369
00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:28,581
Say, you guys got
any billy whizz?

370
00:12:28,615 --> 00:12:31,418
Any juice, any sweet Mary Jane?
I'm looking.

371
00:12:31,451 --> 00:12:33,586
Okay, if you're really
not a chaperone...

372
00:12:33,620 --> 00:12:35,754
why don't you
take a sip of this?

373
00:12:35,788 --> 00:12:38,625
Maybe I will, maybe I won't.
I got nothing to prove.

374
00:12:38,658 --> 00:12:39,893
Are you a 'rone or not?

375
00:12:39,927 --> 00:12:42,328
Give me that.

376
00:12:46,834 --> 00:12:49,135
(both chuckle)

377
00:12:52,873 --> 00:12:55,607
What is that?
Is that a suicide?

378
00:12:55,642 --> 00:12:58,144
The soda flavors
all mixed together.
You know it, bro.

379
00:12:58,177 --> 00:13:01,014
That was super intense.
(laughs)
(laughs)

380
00:13:01,048 --> 00:13:02,682
Sorry, I spit some of it up.

381
00:13:02,715 --> 00:13:04,283
He's cool.

382
00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:06,452
(laughing)

383
00:13:11,158 --> 00:13:12,759
Hey, buddy, uh,

384
00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:15,828
Tommy, is it? I just...
I just wanted to apologize

385
00:13:15,863 --> 00:13:17,429
for what happened
before, kiddo.

386
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:19,532
What, are you gonna
propose to me, now?

387
00:13:19,566 --> 00:13:20,600
(boys laugh)

388
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:23,169
(laughs)

389
00:13:23,202 --> 00:13:25,105
That's funny. No, I...
I get it. You know, when I...

390
00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:28,140
when I was young, I too found
that humor can be a useful tool.

391
00:13:28,174 --> 00:13:29,842
Dude, get up,
I'm not gonna marry you.

392
00:13:29,876 --> 00:13:32,044
(short laugh)

393
00:13:32,078 --> 00:13:34,047
I, too, found
that humor can be a...

394
00:13:34,081 --> 00:13:35,481
(clears throat)
...a useful tool.

395
00:13:35,514 --> 00:13:37,484
And then you grow up
and you become a man.

396
00:13:37,517 --> 00:13:39,619
Well, you smell
like a woman.

397
00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:41,388
That's it, enough
is enough with you.

398
00:13:41,421 --> 00:13:43,789
You think you're
a tough guy, tough guy?

399
00:13:43,822 --> 00:13:45,357
Prove it, man.

400
00:13:45,392 --> 00:13:46,692
Name the time and place.

401
00:13:46,725 --> 00:13:48,961
15 minutes.
Parking lot.

402
00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:50,397
Fist fight?
Foot race.

403
00:13:50,429 --> 00:13:52,298
A what?
Yeah,

404
00:13:52,331 --> 00:13:54,167
you heard me--
foot race, man.

405
00:13:54,201 --> 00:13:57,269
I'll run circles
around you and all your pals.

406
00:14:01,541 --> 00:14:04,844
(giggling)
Oh. You girls are
multiplying like bunnies.

407
00:14:04,878 --> 00:14:06,678
(chuckles)
That's weird.

408
00:14:06,712 --> 00:14:09,182
Lot more of you than
there is of me.

409
00:14:09,216 --> 00:14:13,019
(giggles)
(giggling continues)

410
00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:16,355
We should lock all the doors.

411
00:14:16,389 --> 00:14:18,191
No one gets in,
no one gets out.

412
00:14:18,225 --> 00:14:20,360
The culprit's inside.
It's friggin' Gosford Park!

413
00:14:20,393 --> 00:14:22,195
You need to just calm
down a little, Jess.

414
00:14:22,229 --> 00:14:25,664
I can't calm down!
I want this to be perfect.

415
00:14:25,697 --> 00:14:27,100
I know, but it's
too late for that, okay?

416
00:14:27,134 --> 00:14:29,201
There are kids
doing their homework in there.

417
00:14:29,235 --> 00:14:30,503
It's bleak.

418
00:14:30,537 --> 00:14:31,870
I know after what
happened with Nick

419
00:14:31,904 --> 00:14:34,506
you wanted this
to go great, but

420
00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:37,110
it's not your fault that the
dance got messed up, all right?

421
00:14:37,144 --> 00:14:39,446
You'll get 'em
next time.

422
00:14:39,479 --> 00:14:40,947
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!

423
00:14:40,980 --> 00:14:42,782
Chug! Chug! Chug!
Chug! Chug! Chug!

424
00:14:42,815 --> 00:14:46,653
Oh, that was a sugar rush, man.
That's a buzz in the brain!

425
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,557
Ooh, ooh!
(laughs)

426
00:14:50,590 --> 00:14:52,960
You guys see how high
I just got?

427
00:14:52,993 --> 00:14:54,860
(laughter)

428
00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:56,428
(groans)

429
00:14:57,563 --> 00:14:59,066
I'm good.

430
00:14:59,099 --> 00:15:00,432
He ain't a 'rone. Too dumb.

431
00:15:00,466 --> 00:15:02,601
Aw, this is fun, man!
I miss this!

432
00:15:02,634 --> 00:15:04,236
I really do, man.
Let's keep going.

433
00:15:04,270 --> 00:15:06,139
Let's get burgers.
Meet some girls.

434
00:15:06,173 --> 00:15:08,075
Different ages, man.
It's so early!

435
00:15:08,107 --> 00:15:11,278
Hey, we got something
to show you.

436
00:15:11,311 --> 00:15:14,147
(sighs)

437
00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:16,482
Look, guys, we had
a lot of fun, but...

438
00:15:16,515 --> 00:15:20,120
we can get in a lot of trouble
for doing this.

439
00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:24,256
Which is why you gotta run
really fast when it goes off.

440
00:15:24,291 --> 00:15:25,325
Like now!

441
00:15:25,357 --> 00:15:26,759
Oh, dude!
Go! I mean it! Go!

442
00:15:26,793 --> 00:15:29,828
(laughing)

443
00:15:29,861 --> 00:15:31,597
Oh, my God!
Yeah!

444
00:15:31,630 --> 00:15:33,232
Yeah!

445
00:15:33,265 --> 00:15:35,434
What are we gonna do now?

446
00:15:37,004 --> 00:15:38,004
NICK:
Let's ride.

447
00:15:38,038 --> 00:15:39,272
BOY:
Oh, hell yeah!

448
00:15:41,008 --> 00:15:42,341
(gasps)

449
00:15:42,375 --> 00:15:43,442
Wendy?

450
00:15:43,475 --> 00:15:45,979
(groans)
Busted.

451
00:15:52,519 --> 00:15:53,952
Well, you really did
come prepared, Wendy.

452
00:15:53,986 --> 00:15:55,687
A wrench...

453
00:15:55,721 --> 00:15:58,957
some glue...

454
00:15:58,991 --> 00:16:01,327
a box of tampons?

455
00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:02,861
What were you gonna do
with this?

456
00:16:02,894 --> 00:16:03,996
Um...

457
00:16:04,030 --> 00:16:06,499
Oh. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

458
00:16:07,833 --> 00:16:10,169
So you really didn't want
the dance to happen?

459
00:16:10,202 --> 00:16:12,172
None of the boys want
to dance with me.

460
00:16:12,205 --> 00:16:13,472
Jess?

461
00:16:13,505 --> 00:16:14,374
Hey, Cece.

462
00:16:14,407 --> 00:16:16,043
Hey.
This is Wendy.

463
00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:17,443
She was just telling
me how she doesn't like

464
00:16:17,476 --> 00:16:18,711
to dance with boys.

465
00:16:18,745 --> 00:16:19,711
(mouthing)

466
00:16:19,745 --> 00:16:23,115
Oh.
(clears throat)

467
00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:27,153
Yeah.
Well... that makes sense

468
00:16:27,187 --> 00:16:29,355
because boys are
the dumbest.

469
00:16:29,389 --> 00:16:30,490
You're just saying that.

470
00:16:30,523 --> 00:16:31,791
No. No, no.
No.

471
00:16:31,823 --> 00:16:34,226
Cece and I have met
so many boys,

472
00:16:34,260 --> 00:16:35,727
and they are
all so dumb.

473
00:16:35,761 --> 00:16:37,996
Yeah, and I've met more
than her, so...

474
00:16:38,030 --> 00:16:40,832
Yeah, and Cece has met more
than me because she is...

475
00:16:40,866 --> 00:16:42,534
nicer than me.

476
00:16:42,568 --> 00:16:44,870
Nicer?
I just mean
you've met...

477
00:16:44,903 --> 00:16:46,572
'cause you're
well-traveled.

478
00:16:46,605 --> 00:16:49,209
"Well-traveled" is how
we're gonna say it?
I mean...

479
00:16:49,241 --> 00:16:50,976
You better tread lightly.
I will...
Travel...

480
00:16:51,009 --> 00:16:52,211
You travel a lot.

481
00:16:52,245 --> 00:16:54,413
Mm-hmm.

482
00:16:54,447 --> 00:16:56,716
I don't think
I'm ever gonna dance with a boy.

483
00:16:56,749 --> 00:16:59,552
Listen, are boys dumb?

484
00:16:59,586 --> 00:17:02,822
Yes. Yes.

485
00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:06,726
Do they do disappointing,
stupid, stupid things

486
00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:11,230
that really... hurt
your feelings? Yes.

487
00:17:11,263 --> 00:17:14,201
Sometimes things don't work
out the way you plan them--

488
00:17:14,233 --> 00:17:17,104
actually, they never work
out the way you plan them--

489
00:17:17,136 --> 00:17:20,906
but, in the end,
it's all worth it,

490
00:17:20,940 --> 00:17:24,711
and that's why
you have to try.

491
00:17:27,913 --> 00:17:29,615
Are you talking
about sex or dancing?

492
00:17:29,648 --> 00:17:31,550
Dancing. Oh, God.
Dancing, dancing.
Dancing. Dancing.

493
00:17:31,584 --> 00:17:33,220
Upright dancing.
We're talking
about dancing.

494
00:17:33,252 --> 00:17:35,387
Okay. I'll try.

495
00:17:35,422 --> 00:17:36,888
So let's get back
out there.

496
00:17:36,923 --> 00:17:38,125
Oh, Cece, it's okay.

497
00:17:38,157 --> 00:17:40,026
There's no light,
no music.

498
00:17:40,058 --> 00:17:41,260
The dance is over.

499
00:17:41,294 --> 00:17:42,929
Oh, no, this dance
is not over.

500
00:17:42,961 --> 00:17:47,134
We just need to find
some stupid boys.

501
00:17:48,300 --> 00:17:49,902
You look so slow.

502
00:17:49,935 --> 00:17:50,970
Like a s...
like a s...

503
00:17:51,002 --> 00:17:53,440
super... dumb, slow turtle.

504
00:17:53,472 --> 00:17:55,375
I'm so fast, and you're so old.
So much like a...

505
00:17:55,407 --> 00:17:57,609
like a turtle,
it's crazy to me.

506
00:17:57,644 --> 00:17:58,778
Are we gonna do this or what?

507
00:17:58,810 --> 00:17:59,945
Oh, yeah,
we're gonna do this.

508
00:17:59,979 --> 00:18:02,048
I'm like a Hebrew cheetah.

509
00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:03,950
On the count
of three.

510
00:18:03,982 --> 00:18:05,417
One...

511
00:18:05,451 --> 00:18:06,719
two...

512
00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:08,788
thr... Flo-Jo!

513
00:18:08,820 --> 00:18:10,789
(Winston whimpering)

514
00:18:10,823 --> 00:18:14,161
(girls screaming)

515
00:18:14,193 --> 00:18:16,663
Flo-Jo!
(girls screaming)

516
00:18:16,695 --> 00:18:19,465
(indistinct screaming, shouting)

517
00:18:19,499 --> 00:18:21,233
What are you doing?

518
00:18:21,268 --> 00:18:22,634
(shouting, screaming continues)

519
00:18:25,805 --> 00:18:27,207
(shouting, screaming continues)

520
00:18:30,809 --> 00:18:32,345
(blowing whistle)
(screaming stops)

521
00:18:32,378 --> 00:18:33,645
Hello?!

522
00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:35,582
(screaming)

523
00:18:35,615 --> 00:18:37,817
Yeah! Yeah!

524
00:18:37,849 --> 00:18:39,751
(grunts) Man!
(laughing)

525
00:18:39,786 --> 00:18:42,588
What is your
problem, man?!
I wasn't driving!

526
00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:44,457
(indistinct arguing)

527
00:18:44,490 --> 00:18:46,459
Are you kidding me?!

528
00:18:47,227 --> 00:18:48,295
(blows whistle)

529
00:18:48,327 --> 00:18:50,663
All students inside now!

530
00:18:50,697 --> 00:18:52,598
Go, go, go, go, go, go.

531
00:18:52,632 --> 00:18:53,633
You three

532
00:18:53,665 --> 00:18:54,866
are the worst

533
00:18:54,901 --> 00:18:57,936
chaperones possible
on earth.

534
00:18:57,970 --> 00:18:59,306
A dog would be better than you.

535
00:18:59,338 --> 00:19:01,340
A plant wearing underwear

536
00:19:01,374 --> 00:19:02,942
would be better
than you.

537
00:19:02,974 --> 00:19:06,712
Ray Charles' ghost would be
better than you!

538
00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:08,780
Wh...

539
00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:10,317
what kind of men are you?

540
00:19:11,183 --> 00:19:12,818
(door opens)
JESS: Hey!

541
00:19:13,385 --> 00:19:15,153
Stupid boys!

542
00:19:16,055 --> 00:19:18,124
We need ya.

543
00:19:18,156 --> 00:19:20,460
Who's ready to have a good time?

544
00:19:20,492 --> 00:19:22,461
The lights went out, and
you made your own light.

545
00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:26,333
(cheering)
The music went out, and we're
gonna make our own music.

546
00:19:26,365 --> 00:19:28,201
(cheering)
We have

547
00:19:28,234 --> 00:19:30,737
a very special guest for you
tonight. Please give a big

548
00:19:30,769 --> 00:19:32,739
Coolidge Middle School welcome

549
00:19:32,771 --> 00:19:35,642
to the Dumbest Boys in School!

550
00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:37,344
(cheering)

551
00:19:37,376 --> 00:19:39,546
I thought we were going
with Sweet Surrender.

552
00:19:39,578 --> 00:19:40,880
This won't be good.

553
00:19:40,913 --> 00:19:42,249
(girls screaming)

554
00:19:42,281 --> 00:19:43,549
Calm down, girls.
Don't get crazy.

555
00:19:43,583 --> 00:19:45,317
Just calm down.

556
00:19:45,352 --> 00:19:47,386
CECE:
Okay, Coolidge, get ready
to hit the dance floor

557
00:19:47,420 --> 00:19:50,856
in three, two, one!

558
00:19:50,890 --> 00:19:53,526
(whoops)
Aw, yeah. All right.

559
00:19:53,559 --> 00:19:56,596
(beatboxing)

560
00:19:56,628 --> 00:19:59,266
Rap battle. 8 Mile.

561
00:19:59,298 --> 00:20:01,032
This one goes out
to your vice principal

562
00:20:01,067 --> 00:20:03,035
and my friend, Jessica Day.

563
00:20:03,068 --> 00:20:05,037
* I don't wear indigo,
I don't wear teal *

564
00:20:05,070 --> 00:20:07,038
* You better look out,
you know that's right *

565
00:20:07,073 --> 00:20:09,709
* That's right 'cause-'cause
Schmidt is for real, mmm *

566
00:20:09,741 --> 00:20:11,510
* I take that back, actually

567
00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:13,512
* I do wear teal sometimes

568
00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,382
When I say "sometimes,"

569
00:20:15,414 --> 00:20:17,215
you say "teal." Sometimes!

570
00:20:17,250 --> 00:20:18,417
ALL:
Teal!
Sometimes!

571
00:20:18,451 --> 00:20:19,419
Teal!
Sometimes!

572
00:20:19,451 --> 00:20:20,886
Teal!
Mic drop.

573
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:23,021
(cheering)

574
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:25,191
What's up, what's up, what's up?
(cheering)

575
00:20:25,223 --> 00:20:26,925
Anybody here from Chicago?
Chicago, Illinois?

576
00:20:26,959 --> 00:20:28,694
City of Big Shoulders,
Big Dreams!

577
00:20:28,728 --> 00:20:31,564
That would make sense.
You guys go

578
00:20:31,597 --> 00:20:33,865
to school here. You're just
kids, so you're all from here.

579
00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:36,269
Somebody else go. Yeah.
That was it?

580
00:20:36,302 --> 00:20:38,805
(screaming)

581
00:20:38,837 --> 00:20:40,940
* Gonna be a cop,
straight walking a beat *

582
00:20:40,972 --> 00:20:42,974
* Role model,
out on the street *

583
00:20:43,009 --> 00:20:45,744
* Unless I get assigned to
a desk, which is also vital *

584
00:20:45,778 --> 00:20:48,414
* Because when paperwork slides,
that's how you get a mistrial *

585
00:20:48,448 --> 00:20:50,450
When I say "miss,"
you say "trial."

586
00:20:50,482 --> 00:20:51,917
Miss.
ALL: Trial.

587
00:20:51,951 --> 00:20:53,552
I said, when I say "miss,"
you say "trial."

588
00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:55,054
Miss, unless you trying to die.

589
00:20:55,086 --> 00:20:57,123
NICK: What, are you nuts?
Then know who you are.

590
00:20:57,155 --> 00:20:59,392
A whole carton of dumbasses.
WINSTON: Ruin them khakis
you got on.

591
00:20:59,425 --> 00:21:01,461
Thank you all very much!
Thank you!
I'm just saying,
they're wearing light...

592
00:21:01,493 --> 00:21:03,095
NICK:
Hey, they're kids.

593
00:21:03,128 --> 00:21:04,497
Good idea, Todd.

594
00:21:04,530 --> 00:21:05,565
WINSTON:
...also got to die.

595
00:21:05,597 --> 00:21:07,066
NICK:
Ow...!

596
00:21:07,098 --> 00:21:09,101
MICHAEL FRANTI:
One, two, one, two.

597
00:21:09,134 --> 00:21:10,737
Here we go.

598
00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:13,339
* I'm alive, I'm alive,
I'm alive *

599
00:21:13,373 --> 00:21:15,240
* I'm alive,
I'm alive, I'm alive *

600
00:21:15,273 --> 00:21:17,242
* This is what it sounds like

601
00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:19,846
* Oh... oh

602
00:21:19,878 --> 00:21:22,181
* I'm alive

603
00:21:22,213 --> 00:21:24,784
(whistling along to music)

604
00:21:29,188 --> 00:21:31,257
* This is what it sounds like

605
00:21:31,289 --> 00:21:34,026
* Oh, oh, I'm alive...

606
00:21:34,059 --> 00:21:37,296
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org