1 00:00:02,001 --> 00:00:03,237 Hey, guys, Bertie's playing it cool. 2 00:00:03,270 --> 00:00:04,405 But you guys coming over 3 00:00:04,437 --> 00:00:05,405 for dinner tonight is 4 00:00:05,439 --> 00:00:06,907 a really big deal to her. 5 00:00:06,940 --> 00:00:09,676 So, be there by 6:00, and no bailing. 6 00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:10,910 Ooh, bailing on dinner. 7 00:00:10,944 --> 00:00:12,212 Nick, I need you. 8 00:00:12,246 --> 00:00:13,413 Wingman sitch. 9 00:00:13,446 --> 00:00:14,548 Jewish girl, sensible nose. 10 00:00:14,582 --> 00:00:15,548 High-level target. 11 00:00:15,583 --> 00:00:16,583 I can't be your wingman. 12 00:00:16,617 --> 00:00:18,251 We got to go this Bertie dinner. 13 00:00:18,286 --> 00:00:19,719 Don't make it seem like a chore, okay? 14 00:00:19,753 --> 00:00:21,655 She is making ten or 11 soups. 15 00:00:21,689 --> 00:00:23,657 And all of them are cream-based. 16 00:00:23,690 --> 00:00:25,092 Cool. (Coach grunts, ringtone plays) 17 00:00:25,126 --> 00:00:26,660 Hey, Mom. 18 00:00:26,693 --> 00:00:28,661 Hi, baby, I'm sorry to interrupt. 19 00:00:28,696 --> 00:00:31,231 I know the morning is the most sensual time of day. 20 00:00:31,265 --> 00:00:33,000 But, um, I need you. It's your sister. 21 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,034 Abby? What is it? 22 00:00:35,069 --> 00:00:38,005 She was arrested at a hotel in San Diego. 23 00:00:38,037 --> 00:00:38,838 How's everything with your sister? 24 00:00:38,871 --> 00:00:40,374 I mean, she was caught stealing, 25 00:00:40,408 --> 00:00:42,076 they called the cops, it's a mess. 26 00:00:42,109 --> 00:00:44,411 Imagine me next door with a, with a nice Jewish girl. 27 00:00:44,445 --> 00:00:45,912 Hey, Jess has a sister? Yeah, I've never met her. 28 00:00:45,945 --> 00:00:47,414 I need you to go to the jail, 29 00:00:47,448 --> 00:00:49,182 pick her up and put her on a plane home. 30 00:00:49,216 --> 00:00:51,252 Oh, that's fabulous. And by the way, um... 31 00:00:51,284 --> 00:00:52,552 I don't know what kind of jail this is. 32 00:00:52,585 --> 00:00:54,088 So be prepared for anything. 33 00:00:54,121 --> 00:00:56,055 I mean, wear a shirt you don't love-love. 34 00:00:56,090 --> 00:00:57,691 Okay. Love you. 35 00:00:57,725 --> 00:00:59,426 Hi, Nick... (door slams closed) 36 00:00:59,460 --> 00:01:02,061 Okay, here, these are all the ladles that I could find. 37 00:01:02,096 --> 00:01:05,599 Ooh, this one is deep. 38 00:01:05,632 --> 00:01:06,867 So, what's up with your sister? 39 00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:09,036 Well, she's coming to town. 40 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,037 Great! Oh, yikes, that's... 41 00:01:10,069 --> 00:01:11,539 The best news ever? I know! 42 00:01:11,572 --> 00:01:15,775 It's so, so, so, so, so, so, 43 00:01:15,808 --> 00:01:17,777 so good. 44 00:01:17,811 --> 00:01:19,712 * Who's that girl? 45 00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:22,081 * Who's that girl? * * It's Jess. 46 00:01:22,115 --> 00:01:25,618 Well, I can't wait to meet the mysterious Abby Day. 47 00:01:25,652 --> 00:01:27,221 Not mysterious. 48 00:01:27,254 --> 00:01:28,421 Jet setter. 49 00:01:28,456 --> 00:01:29,722 You know, I always imagined her 50 00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:31,224 with a French-speaking black husband, 51 00:01:31,259 --> 00:01:33,727 like a Jerome St. Pierre. 52 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:34,728 So, I'll probably meet her at the airport 53 00:01:34,762 --> 00:01:36,329 for a little layover hang. 54 00:01:36,364 --> 00:01:37,331 Why are you ignoring me, Nick? 'Cause I'm paying 55 00:01:37,365 --> 00:01:38,466 attention to my girlfriend. Nick! 56 00:01:38,498 --> 00:01:40,301 There, a reaction! Thank goodness! 57 00:01:40,334 --> 00:01:42,270 Now I know I'm not a ghost. 58 00:01:42,302 --> 00:01:43,637 All right, I got to go. Oh, you're going...? 59 00:01:43,670 --> 00:01:45,272 I'll, uh, I-I got to go. 60 00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:46,573 Hey, hey, hey, hey, Jess, Jess! 61 00:01:46,606 --> 00:01:47,974 What if I came with? 62 00:01:48,008 --> 00:01:49,242 Yeah, you know, I don't think 63 00:01:49,277 --> 00:01:51,145 you two would really get along. Why not? 64 00:01:51,179 --> 00:01:53,079 Look, I just haven't seen her in a really long time, and... 65 00:01:53,112 --> 00:01:54,948 Jess, I'd like to meet your sister. 66 00:01:56,115 --> 00:01:57,918 Why don't we do this? Um... 67 00:01:57,950 --> 00:01:59,486 Why don't I go pick her up? And then 68 00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:02,423 come meet us for a quick dinner before she leaves? 69 00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:04,924 That would be awesome. That's all I was looking for. Yeah. Okay. 70 00:02:04,957 --> 00:02:06,659 Winston, we can't make your dinner! Bye, Winston. 71 00:02:06,694 --> 00:02:07,795 I'm not gonna be with you. Okay. WINSTON: Wait! 72 00:02:07,828 --> 00:02:09,497 No, no, no, no! Wait... 73 00:02:09,530 --> 00:02:11,264 CECE: Hey, hey. 74 00:02:11,299 --> 00:02:12,932 Are you really letting Nick meet Abby? 75 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:15,002 Hell, no. I'm going to pick her up from jail. 76 00:02:15,034 --> 00:02:17,271 Like, straight-up jail. 77 00:02:17,305 --> 00:02:19,939 I told Nick he could meet her on her "layover" 78 00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:23,343 but, whoops, her flight got changed. No time. Sorry. 79 00:02:23,377 --> 00:02:25,612 Bye, Nick! I'll see you later! NICK: I'm out of shampoo! 80 00:02:25,646 --> 00:02:27,848 Gonna use bar soap! But your sister won't know the difference! 81 00:02:27,881 --> 00:02:29,949 Okay! Can't wait for you to meet her! 82 00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:32,319 (whispers): He's never going to meet her. 83 00:02:33,521 --> 00:02:35,288 Hey, dude. I can't go 84 00:02:35,323 --> 00:02:36,856 to this dinner. It's a double date now. 85 00:02:36,889 --> 00:02:38,859 Things are already weird enough between me and Cece. 86 00:02:38,891 --> 00:02:40,127 Because you went on a date two months ago 87 00:02:40,159 --> 00:02:41,829 and she never texted you? 88 00:02:41,861 --> 00:02:42,362 Yeah. 89 00:02:43,896 --> 00:02:46,334 Be a man, Coach! All right. 90 00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:49,135 Be there by 6:00 and bring a bottle of wine. 91 00:02:49,168 --> 00:02:52,473 And don't be cheap, either. Bertie is a Somalian. 92 00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:55,343 Okay. 93 00:02:55,376 --> 00:02:57,144 Oh, tidings, Abigail. 94 00:02:57,176 --> 00:02:59,513 I'm Jess's beau. My name is Nicholas. 95 00:02:59,546 --> 00:03:01,348 It's a pleasure to... Oh, good God. 96 00:03:01,382 --> 00:03:03,317 Is that a common barber's comb? Look, Schmidt, 97 00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:05,385 I just want to make a good impression on Jess's sister. 98 00:03:05,419 --> 00:03:07,187 Yeah, well, I want Julia Child not to be dead, 99 00:03:07,221 --> 00:03:08,989 but here we find ourselves. 100 00:03:09,021 --> 00:03:10,223 What did you come in here to talk to me about? 101 00:03:10,258 --> 00:03:11,824 As I was saying earlier, 102 00:03:11,859 --> 00:03:13,661 I have a very difficult flirting situation here. 103 00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:15,862 I mean, it's a double black diamond: trees, moguls. 104 00:03:15,896 --> 00:03:17,330 And, as we both know, you're the best 105 00:03:17,365 --> 00:03:18,566 wingman who's ever wung. 106 00:03:18,598 --> 00:03:20,167 NICK: Thank you, Schmidt! 107 00:03:20,199 --> 00:03:21,568 I'm almost glad I got in the accident 108 00:03:21,602 --> 00:03:23,069 so we can have more days like this together, 109 00:03:23,103 --> 00:03:24,671 with you helping me through this. 110 00:03:24,704 --> 00:03:27,740 How could a guy so rich be so generous with his time? 111 00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:29,009 Whoa... 112 00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:31,010 Excuse me. Are you the writer 113 00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:34,348 of So You've Mastered the Female Orgasm, Now What? 114 00:03:34,382 --> 00:03:36,015 Incredible. Can I have your autograph? Of course. 115 00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:37,685 Come on, man. It's a quick party. I'll have you back 116 00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:38,885 by your little dinner. Okay, I'll do it, 117 00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:41,521 but as soon as Jess says I've got to go, I'm out. 118 00:03:41,555 --> 00:03:43,189 Thank you very much. For your mitigated support 119 00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:44,557 and tiny portion of your life. 120 00:03:44,591 --> 00:03:45,959 Sure. (chuckles) Okay. 121 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:48,929 Hey, Abby. 122 00:03:48,961 --> 00:03:51,699 Oh, look who came to pick up her big, bad sister. 123 00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:54,534 So, you good to go? Or you gotta sign yearbooks or something? 124 00:03:54,567 --> 00:03:55,536 (lock buzzes, door rattles) 125 00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:57,103 Bridget stole your gum. 126 00:03:57,137 --> 00:04:00,106 What? You took my Fruity Fruit? 127 00:04:00,139 --> 00:04:02,909 I ain't got your Fruity Fruit, bitch! 128 00:04:02,943 --> 00:04:04,277 Oh, my God. Oh... Gum? 129 00:04:04,312 --> 00:04:06,379 (grunting) 130 00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:07,747 I want my Fruity Fruit! 131 00:04:07,781 --> 00:04:10,082 I ain't got your Fruity Fruit, bitch! 132 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:14,221 What about the new guy? I want to meet him. 133 00:04:14,253 --> 00:04:16,055 We don't really have time to meet him 'cause I have to take you 134 00:04:16,088 --> 00:04:17,925 to the airport 'cause Mom's already bought you a ticket. 135 00:04:17,957 --> 00:04:20,427 I know all of her credit card information, 136 00:04:20,461 --> 00:04:21,928 No. and I can just change it. 137 00:04:21,961 --> 00:04:24,230 Wait, what are you doing? Wait, no. Sweet. 138 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:26,233 Why don't you just for once in your life do something 139 00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:28,067 that you're not supposed to do? 140 00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:30,403 I didn't put the cap back on the honey bear the other day. 141 00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:32,572 Drive. Drive. Drive. Oh, my God. No! No! 142 00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:35,408 No! No! I will not drive unsafely! Try-try it! 143 00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:37,944 I have a perfect record. Get your hands away from me. 144 00:04:39,146 --> 00:04:40,980 Why don't you want me to meet him? About. 145 00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:42,983 Are you embarrassed of me? I do. No. 146 00:04:43,016 --> 00:04:45,151 Great. 'Cause I just got on a later flight. That's great. 147 00:04:45,185 --> 00:04:48,622 (chuckles) So excited. I know. 148 00:04:48,656 --> 00:04:51,091 Did you just start driving really slow? 149 00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:52,326 No, I actually think I'm speeding. 150 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:53,593 I hope there's no coppers around. 151 00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:56,930 (siren whoops) Drive faster. 152 00:04:56,963 --> 00:04:59,298 Sorry, sir! Thank you for your service! 153 00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:05,105 * You're over my head, I'm outta my mind * 154 00:05:05,137 --> 00:05:06,607 * Thinking I was born in the wrong time... * 155 00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:08,841 NICK: What is this place? It's a bar mitzvah. 156 00:05:08,875 --> 00:05:11,512 NICK: I am not watching a kid get circumcised. 157 00:05:11,545 --> 00:05:13,814 The target is Rachael. She's a Hebrew school teacher. 158 00:05:13,846 --> 00:05:15,449 Crashing some random kid's bar mitzvah's 159 00:05:15,483 --> 00:05:16,983 the best way to get her? 160 00:05:17,016 --> 00:05:19,286 Get her on the dance floor-- a little bit softer now, 161 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:22,288 a little bit louder now-- sweep her off her feet, 162 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,124 we'll get married, we'll have a son named Elon. 163 00:05:24,156 --> 00:05:26,293 At his bar mitzvah, I tell the story of how I met his mom 164 00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,461 at this bar mitzvah. Not a dry eye in the house. 165 00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:30,831 Jewish continuity, et cetera, et cetera. 166 00:05:30,863 --> 00:05:32,800 Do you realize how long you were just talking? 167 00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:35,502 There she is. Whew! 168 00:05:35,536 --> 00:05:37,838 A beautiful piece of hamentaschen. What the hell is hamentaschen? 169 00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:39,673 Problem is, is her dad is my rabbi. 170 00:05:39,706 --> 00:05:42,074 He hates me. So I just need to charm Rachael 171 00:05:42,108 --> 00:05:44,644 before he gets to her and tells her horrible-slash-true things 172 00:05:44,677 --> 00:05:45,713 about me. Absolutely. 173 00:05:45,745 --> 00:05:46,646 SCHMIDT: Oh! Hello! 174 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:49,048 What a day. Oh... 175 00:05:49,081 --> 00:05:51,519 a special day. Oh, take my hand. 176 00:05:51,552 --> 00:05:54,687 Take your hand. A special day. 177 00:05:54,721 --> 00:05:56,757 You just wanted to take my hand so you could say that again, didn't you? 178 00:05:56,790 --> 00:05:58,257 Mmm, I did. Oh. 179 00:05:58,290 --> 00:06:00,026 I don't think we've had the pleasure of meeting. 180 00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:03,196 May I take your hand, too? 181 00:06:03,230 --> 00:06:04,764 You can take anything you want, Shirley. 182 00:06:05,932 --> 00:06:08,334 So, yeah, just the... 183 00:06:08,367 --> 00:06:11,672 just the two of us with Bertie and Winston tonight? 184 00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:14,675 Yeah, just, uh... just-just you and me. 185 00:06:14,708 --> 00:06:17,177 Uh, and Bertie. And Winston. 186 00:06:17,209 --> 00:06:20,514 Just... eating night lunch. Yeah, like a... 187 00:06:20,548 --> 00:06:22,882 you know, like a date. But not a date 'cause... Hmm? 188 00:06:22,915 --> 00:06:24,283 No. Yeah. 189 00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:27,120 So, uh... 190 00:06:27,153 --> 00:06:30,356 what is that? Is that a onesie? (chuckles) Yeah. 191 00:06:30,389 --> 00:06:32,292 How do you... how do you take it off to use the bathroom? 192 00:06:32,324 --> 00:06:33,961 Mmm... 193 00:06:35,394 --> 00:06:38,298 Whoa. Nice place. 194 00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:40,433 CECE: Oh, my God! Hey! 195 00:06:40,468 --> 00:06:44,805 You look, you know, amazing. You look amazing. Look at you. 196 00:06:44,838 --> 00:06:47,908 Oh, my God. I'm so happy you're not just paper-thin anymore. 197 00:06:47,941 --> 00:06:50,810 Oh, my God. You're just the best. 198 00:06:50,843 --> 00:06:53,646 Hello, Hot Cocoa. Whoa. 199 00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:57,718 What's going on here? I'm getting a real vibe. Nothing. 200 00:06:57,750 --> 00:06:58,985 No. Mmm, 201 00:06:59,019 --> 00:07:01,555 you want to have sex with her, 202 00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:04,458 you... are not so sure. 203 00:07:04,492 --> 00:07:06,392 (Coach and Cece chuckle) 204 00:07:06,425 --> 00:07:08,829 If she doesn't want to put out, I will. 205 00:07:08,862 --> 00:07:10,997 * Abby Day There you go. 206 00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:13,634 * Abby Day, she always says 207 00:07:13,666 --> 00:07:15,903 * The most inappropriate stuff. * 208 00:07:15,935 --> 00:07:17,838 You a cappella sing at me one more time, 209 00:07:17,870 --> 00:07:19,639 I'll rip that stupid little dress off you 210 00:07:19,673 --> 00:07:21,108 and shove it down your mouth. 211 00:07:21,141 --> 00:07:22,675 JESS: Okay, I'm scared of you. 212 00:07:22,709 --> 00:07:25,579 * Let's go in my room... Don't hurt me. 213 00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:27,581 Please don't hurt me. 214 00:07:27,615 --> 00:07:28,848 Damn it. She hasn't called. 215 00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:29,817 Will you put please that away? 216 00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:31,018 We're 30 seconds to curtain here. 217 00:07:31,050 --> 00:07:32,653 I don't want to miss a call from Jess, man. 218 00:07:32,685 --> 00:07:34,286 I need you focused. Are you ready? 219 00:07:34,321 --> 00:07:37,324 Yes. I distract the rabbi while you hit on his daughter. 220 00:07:37,356 --> 00:07:38,225 And action. Go. 221 00:07:40,393 --> 00:07:41,327 Ugh. 222 00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:42,329 What a spread, huh? 223 00:07:42,362 --> 00:07:43,295 Terrible. I agree. 224 00:07:43,329 --> 00:07:45,766 Thank God I have pizza in my car. 225 00:07:45,798 --> 00:07:48,168 (laughs) Yeah, that's very funny. 226 00:07:48,201 --> 00:07:49,468 What's the matter with you? That wasn't a joke. 227 00:07:49,502 --> 00:07:51,370 Who has pizza in their car? 228 00:07:51,403 --> 00:07:52,639 Listen, when I make a joke, 229 00:07:52,673 --> 00:07:54,040 you'll know it. I'm a joke machine. 230 00:07:54,074 --> 00:07:56,043 What are the chances? I love jokes! 231 00:07:56,076 --> 00:07:57,711 Oh, good, okay. 232 00:07:57,745 --> 00:08:01,514 Uh... Oh, did you hear the one about the waiter? 233 00:08:01,548 --> 00:08:04,552 No. Walks up to a table full of Jewish women and says, 234 00:08:04,584 --> 00:08:07,019 "Ladies, is anything all right?" 235 00:08:07,053 --> 00:08:10,389 (both laugh) 236 00:08:11,824 --> 00:08:12,725 Hi. 237 00:08:12,759 --> 00:08:13,860 Rack-hael! 238 00:08:13,894 --> 00:08:16,629 Baruch ata Ado, nice dress. 239 00:08:16,663 --> 00:08:18,464 Oh, thank you! 240 00:08:18,497 --> 00:08:22,468 Uh, Shabbat sha-hello. (laughs) Yeah. 241 00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:26,305 It wasn't as good as mine, but it was cute. Yeah. Thanks. Thanks. 242 00:08:26,338 --> 00:08:28,675 How's Hebrew school? It's fine. It's the only place 243 00:08:28,709 --> 00:08:30,911 that would hire me after I got out of rehab. 244 00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:34,881 Two Jews walk into a bar. They buy it. 'Cause they're rich people. 245 00:08:34,914 --> 00:08:36,850 Yeah, they... well, these particular Jews happen 246 00:08:36,884 --> 00:08:39,385 to be rich, but they worked hard. I'm sorry. Hold on... 247 00:08:39,418 --> 00:08:41,554 Telephone call in the middle of a punch line? Hey. 248 00:08:41,588 --> 00:08:43,423 Generation's the worst! Hey, what's going on? 249 00:08:43,456 --> 00:08:46,259 So Abby's flight is crazy delayed. 250 00:08:46,293 --> 00:08:48,696 Um, so, no time for dinner. 251 00:08:48,729 --> 00:08:50,363 I can come right now, Jess. 252 00:08:50,397 --> 00:08:52,499 No. Um, she has, um, a conference call 253 00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:54,033 with Hong Kong about a... 254 00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:55,501 very important, uh... 255 00:08:55,534 --> 00:08:58,105 fashion business, uh, venture magazine... 256 00:08:58,138 --> 00:08:59,740 conference. 257 00:08:59,773 --> 00:09:04,177 Well, maybe I'll see her next time. 258 00:09:04,211 --> 00:09:07,514 Oh, no, no, no, no! 259 00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,081 You will not speak to my daughter! 260 00:09:09,115 --> 00:09:11,684 Rachael, this man is a nut ball! 261 00:09:11,719 --> 00:09:14,955 A nut ball? How dare you! I'm a goofball. 262 00:09:14,988 --> 00:09:17,057 Sammy Davis, Jr. was a goofball. 263 00:09:17,090 --> 00:09:20,192 You, sir, are no Sammy Davis, Jr. 264 00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:22,895 I'm a... I'm a goofball. I am a goofball. You're bad news. Bad news. 265 00:09:22,929 --> 00:09:26,198 Daddy, I love sex, and he wants to have sex with me. 266 00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:29,135 Let him! Oh, I love sex! 267 00:09:29,168 --> 00:09:31,238 (whispering): Text me. Text me. Text. 268 00:09:33,472 --> 00:09:34,774 What was that, man? 269 00:09:34,807 --> 00:09:36,209 Jess is embarrassed of me. 270 00:09:36,243 --> 00:09:37,543 Can you believe that? 271 00:09:37,576 --> 00:09:39,812 What a shanda. What's a shanda? 272 00:09:39,846 --> 00:09:41,380 A shanda! 273 00:09:41,413 --> 00:09:43,115 What a shanda! 274 00:09:43,149 --> 00:09:45,052 All you care about is Jess. 275 00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:46,986 Remember when we used to be best friends? 276 00:09:47,019 --> 00:09:48,421 Uh, that was neat. 277 00:09:48,455 --> 00:09:50,890 What a neat time in my life that was. 278 00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:52,826 Hey, Schmidt! 279 00:09:52,860 --> 00:09:54,827 My girlfriend's embarrassed of me. 280 00:09:54,861 --> 00:09:57,063 Can we go on that for a little bit? 281 00:09:57,096 --> 00:10:01,500 Or does the wingman never get to, you know, flap his wings? 282 00:10:01,533 --> 00:10:04,336 The bird never gets to be the main bird. 283 00:10:04,370 --> 00:10:06,139 This. 284 00:10:06,173 --> 00:10:08,174 JESS: Ugh! 285 00:10:08,207 --> 00:10:10,243 So, I just talked to Nick, 286 00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:12,445 and this is a real shame in the pants, 287 00:10:12,479 --> 00:10:14,280 but he's not coming home tonight. 288 00:10:14,313 --> 00:10:16,817 What? Why? He had to hang out with his work friends. 289 00:10:16,850 --> 00:10:20,120 He can't come and see me? Guess it's just us till... the airport. 290 00:10:20,153 --> 00:10:21,654 Mmm. 291 00:10:23,890 --> 00:10:25,692 You see what you're doing, right? 292 00:10:25,725 --> 00:10:27,494 (gasps) Oh, my God. (laughs) 293 00:10:27,527 --> 00:10:29,996 I'm Mom. (laughs) 294 00:10:30,029 --> 00:10:32,765 No! I'm turning into Mom. How did this happen? 295 00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:34,634 "Just a little bit." "Just a tipple." 296 00:10:34,668 --> 00:10:36,769 "I don't want to get stoned." Hey, I love that 297 00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:39,371 she calls "getting drunk" "getting stoned." (laughs) 298 00:10:39,405 --> 00:10:41,774 Oh, my God. Wait. Big news. Mom got 299 00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:44,476 one of those very, very small denim backpacks. 300 00:10:44,510 --> 00:10:47,014 What? She did, and she calls it her blue guy. 301 00:10:47,047 --> 00:10:49,716 She's, like, "Oh, I got to grab my blue guy." 302 00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:51,150 Can't believe you're making fun of Mom. 303 00:10:51,183 --> 00:10:52,619 You're her perfect little baby. 304 00:10:52,652 --> 00:10:54,788 I'm... Hey, I'm... 305 00:10:54,822 --> 00:10:56,389 I'm not really a baby. 306 00:10:56,423 --> 00:10:58,057 You're a super grown-up. 307 00:10:58,091 --> 00:10:59,893 Thank you. 308 00:11:01,260 --> 00:11:04,230 Oh, my... (laughs) What? 309 00:11:04,264 --> 00:11:06,566 I have a picture of Mom wearing the backpack 310 00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:08,368 at her sign language class graduation. 311 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:10,302 Oh. You have to see this. 312 00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:12,139 No. It's amazing. 313 00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:13,505 I have it in a photo album. 314 00:11:13,539 --> 00:11:16,342 (phone buzzing) 315 00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:26,586 Ooh, bonus shot of Dad 316 00:11:26,619 --> 00:11:28,554 getting a haircut while eating spaghetti! 317 00:11:28,587 --> 00:11:30,423 (laughs) 318 00:11:30,456 --> 00:11:33,125 Abby? 319 00:11:39,066 --> 00:11:41,500 Hey, Outside D, have you seen a girl 320 00:11:41,533 --> 00:11:43,436 that looks like me, but with chaos in her eyes? 321 00:11:43,470 --> 00:11:46,105 Sorry. I'm doing my taxes. 322 00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:49,876 Ooh! I'm taking in more than I'm spending. 323 00:11:49,909 --> 00:11:52,379 (ringtone plays) Hey. 324 00:11:52,412 --> 00:11:54,280 Hey. How's it going with Abby? 325 00:11:54,313 --> 00:11:55,948 Yeah, you know, we were having fun for once, and then... 326 00:11:55,982 --> 00:11:57,384 What happened? 327 00:11:57,417 --> 00:11:58,717 Tell me what happened. 328 00:11:58,751 --> 00:12:00,287 I will take care of it for you, baby. 329 00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:05,057 Baby? 330 00:12:05,091 --> 00:12:07,059 I got this. 331 00:12:07,094 --> 00:12:10,029 I got this myself. Thanks. 332 00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:11,563 Quick question. 333 00:12:11,597 --> 00:12:14,400 Is pee-pee a write-off? 334 00:12:17,437 --> 00:12:18,971 Hey. 335 00:12:19,005 --> 00:12:21,541 Not sure my body's built for these chairs. 336 00:12:21,573 --> 00:12:23,710 It's a regular chair, man. 337 00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,711 Yeah. 338 00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:27,213 Hey, bub. 339 00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:28,881 How you doing? 340 00:12:28,916 --> 00:12:31,583 Well, I want to apologize. 341 00:12:31,618 --> 00:12:33,653 Sorry I got distracted. 342 00:12:33,686 --> 00:12:35,054 It's okay. 343 00:12:35,087 --> 00:12:36,588 I'm sorry your girlfriend hates you. 344 00:12:36,623 --> 00:12:38,057 Ah, she doesn't hate me. 345 00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:39,658 She's just ashamed of me or something. 346 00:12:39,692 --> 00:12:41,494 Well, you know what? 347 00:12:41,528 --> 00:12:43,495 If she's really ashamed of you, then... 348 00:12:43,529 --> 00:12:46,834 then she's the stupidest bitch in the whole wide world. 349 00:12:46,866 --> 00:12:48,768 Easy. Okay, slow down. I apologize if I went overboard. 350 00:12:48,802 --> 00:12:50,236 Water under the bridge. I've never been ashamed. 351 00:12:50,269 --> 00:12:52,739 Wish I could have helped you get that girl, man. 352 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:54,140 Feel like I blew it. 353 00:12:54,173 --> 00:12:55,607 Well, she was kind of nutty. 354 00:12:55,642 --> 00:12:57,344 What happened to us, man? 355 00:12:57,376 --> 00:12:59,446 We used to be the best in the biz. 356 00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:01,614 We still are. 357 00:13:01,648 --> 00:13:04,350 I'm the best wingman that's ever wung. 358 00:13:04,384 --> 00:13:07,019 Make a plan? Absolutely. 359 00:13:09,688 --> 00:13:12,558 You're my brother. 360 00:13:14,494 --> 00:13:15,928 Thank you. Charge that to room 304. 361 00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:17,330 JESS: Ah! 362 00:13:17,364 --> 00:13:19,198 You! Charge that to nothing. 363 00:13:19,231 --> 00:13:20,633 She's checking out. 364 00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:22,101 Adding this hotel to your rap sheets? 365 00:13:22,134 --> 00:13:23,336 You found me. 366 00:13:23,370 --> 00:13:25,304 Oh, yeah. Don't you want to know why I left? 367 00:13:25,337 --> 00:13:28,707 You saw my text, and I'm... I'm honestly sorry, 368 00:13:28,740 --> 00:13:32,144 but... you do ruin everything! 369 00:13:32,178 --> 00:13:34,780 Whoa. Thought I was gonna turn the tables with that one. 370 00:13:34,813 --> 00:13:36,515 Get your ass in the car. I'm taking you to the airport. 371 00:13:36,548 --> 00:13:38,051 Thought we could share some calamari. 372 00:13:38,085 --> 00:13:39,385 Now! Kobe beef sliders? 373 00:13:39,418 --> 00:13:40,854 Now...! Lobster quesadilla? 374 00:13:40,888 --> 00:13:43,655 Right now. 375 00:13:45,392 --> 00:13:47,826 (sighs) 376 00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:54,533 (slurping continues) This is a great... 377 00:13:54,567 --> 00:13:56,802 Mmm. 378 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,304 (clicks spoon on bowl) 379 00:13:58,337 --> 00:13:59,706 You know, Bertie had a dream 380 00:13:59,739 --> 00:14:01,073 she killed me. (laughs) 381 00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:04,311 So, uh, Coach, what's new? 382 00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:05,812 Nothing. 383 00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:06,913 Isn't that right, Cece? 384 00:14:06,947 --> 00:14:08,548 Hmm? 385 00:14:08,581 --> 00:14:10,417 What's that supposed to mean? 386 00:14:10,450 --> 00:14:11,750 Oh, you'll figure it out. 387 00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:14,386 If not, just text me. 388 00:14:14,421 --> 00:14:15,721 Or don't. You're good at that. 389 00:14:15,754 --> 00:14:16,923 Oh, my God. 390 00:14:16,956 --> 00:14:18,892 Okay. We made out 391 00:14:18,926 --> 00:14:20,393 once, pointlessly, for two hours. 392 00:14:20,427 --> 00:14:21,894 That's it. 393 00:14:21,928 --> 00:14:23,196 Get over it. Let it go. 394 00:14:23,230 --> 00:14:24,998 Pointless... was it? 395 00:14:25,032 --> 00:14:26,698 Yeah. I mean, who does that?! 396 00:14:26,732 --> 00:14:30,070 Super-hot make out, and then you ice me out for two months. 397 00:14:30,102 --> 00:14:32,605 What are you talking about?! Ice out what? 398 00:14:32,639 --> 00:14:35,207 You text me, "Happy Monday." What do I do with that? 399 00:14:35,241 --> 00:14:37,677 Oh, I don't know. Maybe have a happy Monday. 400 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,011 (laughing): Oh. Going out with you 401 00:14:39,046 --> 00:14:40,413 was the hottest 402 00:14:40,447 --> 00:14:42,282 and dumbest mistake I ever made! 403 00:14:42,315 --> 00:14:43,716 It was the hottest, dumbest, 404 00:14:43,750 --> 00:14:46,885 sexiest mistake I ever made. It was so dumb of me 405 00:14:46,919 --> 00:14:49,022 to pick you up and press you up against that wall. 406 00:14:49,056 --> 00:14:52,625 So dumb how cool those bricks made my skin feel. 407 00:14:52,658 --> 00:14:55,028 You guys should try the fisherman's bisque. 408 00:14:55,062 --> 00:14:56,629 It has just the right amount of tang. 409 00:14:56,663 --> 00:14:58,764 That tang? Mm. 410 00:14:58,798 --> 00:15:00,600 That's tang. 411 00:15:00,633 --> 00:15:02,869 Okay. (laughs) 412 00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:04,870 Whoa! Whoa. Okay. Sorry. I was trying... I was trying to... 413 00:15:04,903 --> 00:15:06,105 Just gonna pivot a little bit more 414 00:15:06,139 --> 00:15:07,975 to the side. Yeah. Yeah, just pivot? 415 00:15:08,008 --> 00:15:09,642 No, okay, look, I think the way it was... Okay. 416 00:15:09,676 --> 00:15:11,878 ...was more... I was up, right? 417 00:15:11,910 --> 00:15:14,147 Yeah, yeah, yeah, you were up. That's-that's how it was... yeah, up. 418 00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:16,416 Just... Okay. All right. Now what do we do? 419 00:15:16,448 --> 00:15:19,485 Maybe just, like, lower your center of gravity, and then this is gonna work. 420 00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:23,655 Lower it down. Okay, okay, okay. Just lower it down, I'm gonna clench my thighs. 421 00:15:23,690 --> 00:15:25,325 I'm gonna fall. I'm gonna fall, all right? I'm gonna fall... 422 00:15:25,357 --> 00:15:26,158 I'm clenching my thighs as hard as I can. 423 00:15:26,192 --> 00:15:28,760 Okay, okay. What? Oh. Geez. 424 00:15:30,096 --> 00:15:31,097 (groans): Oh! Geez. 425 00:15:32,099 --> 00:15:34,400 That was... awful. 426 00:15:34,433 --> 00:15:35,567 That was the worst. Oh, my gosh. 427 00:15:35,601 --> 00:15:37,937 Wow, what is happening? Oh, Lord. 428 00:15:37,971 --> 00:15:40,307 Maybe you were right not to text me back, 'cause that was... 429 00:15:40,340 --> 00:15:42,109 embarrassing. (laughs) 430 00:15:42,142 --> 00:15:45,177 I'm sorry. (quietly): No, that's cool. 431 00:15:45,211 --> 00:15:47,980 Can we just be friends now? You know? 432 00:15:48,014 --> 00:15:51,418 Yeah. I mean, why not? (chuckles) (laughs) 433 00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:52,985 Friends? 434 00:15:53,019 --> 00:15:55,355 Friends. 435 00:15:55,388 --> 00:15:56,923 Friends. 436 00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:58,825 Come here, you. 437 00:15:58,857 --> 00:16:00,326 Oh, oh! Aah! Sorry. 438 00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:03,163 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Literally just bit my tooth. 439 00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:06,633 I'm sorry, when I get excited my teeth come out. Who does that? 440 00:16:06,666 --> 00:16:08,434 Sorry. (muffled): I think I broke my tooth. 441 00:16:08,467 --> 00:16:09,601 Let me see? 442 00:16:09,635 --> 00:16:10,970 Oh. 443 00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:16,842 JESS: Okay. 444 00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:19,511 Go straight to the gate. 445 00:16:19,546 --> 00:16:22,349 Look... I get why you're mad at me. 446 00:16:22,381 --> 00:16:24,017 Okay? But if it's any consolation, 447 00:16:24,051 --> 00:16:26,686 I'm a woman in my 30s about to get on a plane 448 00:16:26,719 --> 00:16:28,455 to go live with my mother. 449 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,289 It's only a matter of time 450 00:16:30,322 --> 00:16:32,692 before I have a tiny denim backpack, too. 451 00:16:34,226 --> 00:16:36,828 I said I would never go back to Portland. 452 00:16:36,863 --> 00:16:40,432 So I guess I'm a complete failure. 453 00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:43,836 I'm the baby. 454 00:16:51,110 --> 00:16:53,712 (whistle blowing) 455 00:16:53,745 --> 00:16:56,816 Is this the craziest thing that's going on 456 00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:58,985 in the airport? Really? (whistle continues) 457 00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,986 Okay, recap, you hit the dance floor, and: NICK: Do what I do best-- 458 00:17:01,019 --> 00:17:05,224 be an embarrassment. Well, it's a gift, Nick. I need you to ruin 459 00:17:05,258 --> 00:17:06,726 this bar mitzvah. What do you say, just get out there and do 460 00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:09,395 some weird dancing? It's got to be bigger than that, man. 461 00:17:09,429 --> 00:17:11,564 Bigger than that? Then I come out there and I... (grunts) 462 00:17:11,597 --> 00:17:12,731 ...knock you out. It's all right. 463 00:17:12,765 --> 00:17:14,233 Again, it'll be a stage punch. 464 00:17:14,267 --> 00:17:16,236 Don't worry. I've done several productions 465 00:17:16,269 --> 00:17:17,237 BOTH: ...of West Side Story. 466 00:17:17,269 --> 00:17:18,270 I know. You told me. 467 00:17:18,305 --> 00:17:19,905 As a Puerto Rican Shark. * Da, da. 468 00:17:19,939 --> 00:17:21,007 That's cool. It was awesome. 469 00:17:21,039 --> 00:17:22,741 You never came and saw it, but... 470 00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:24,777 Well, I was very busy at that time. Whatever, never mind. 471 00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:27,946 The rabbi will then come out, he'll thank me, the hero... Gotcha. 472 00:17:27,980 --> 00:17:30,116 He'll offer me his daughter's hand, then, five years from now, 473 00:17:30,150 --> 00:17:33,286 Rachael is pregnant with Elon's little sister and we're having 474 00:17:33,319 --> 00:17:35,954 a beautiful family New Year's then in our vacation condo 475 00:17:35,988 --> 00:17:38,023 in the Florida Keys. You're doing it again, you're talking in speeches. 476 00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:39,892 Hmm? You've been monologuing, lately, Schmidt. 477 00:17:39,925 --> 00:17:42,028 Do you s... Do you, do you hear yourself? I'm unaware, 478 00:17:42,060 --> 00:17:44,197 I-I'm unaware of it. You, okay. I'm not gonna get mad at you, 479 00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:46,398 'cause I respect you and you're one of my best... I'm unaware of it. 480 00:17:46,432 --> 00:17:48,234 But, like, it's weird. Okay. I apologize. 481 00:17:48,268 --> 00:17:49,269 I'll stop doing it. 482 00:17:49,301 --> 00:17:51,037 (exhales) Hey. Yeah? 483 00:17:51,069 --> 00:17:52,971 Light this cannon up so I can shoot off. 484 00:17:53,005 --> 00:17:54,473 (whooshing, hissing) 485 00:17:54,507 --> 00:17:55,974 (imitates explosion) 486 00:17:56,008 --> 00:17:58,278 Oh! 487 00:17:58,310 --> 00:18:01,147 Well, well, well, it's a snake in the grass. 488 00:18:01,181 --> 00:18:03,383 How you doing? My name's Nick. 489 00:18:03,415 --> 00:18:05,451 You know martial arts? 490 00:18:05,484 --> 00:18:07,053 Swear to God you don't? 491 00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:08,887 You run around with this hunk anymore, 492 00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:11,223 this little surfer cat. 493 00:18:11,258 --> 00:18:12,759 I know your game. 494 00:18:12,791 --> 00:18:14,894 Charming the ladies with your baby blue eyes. 495 00:18:14,926 --> 00:18:16,429 I wish I had 'em! 496 00:18:18,365 --> 00:18:19,898 Breaking my heart, beautiful. 497 00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:21,800 What? 498 00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:23,903 And I all do is love you. I give and I give. 499 00:18:23,935 --> 00:18:28,074 I been working for 40 years at the steel mill for you. 500 00:18:28,106 --> 00:18:32,077 We just met. I want to rip that blouse off you and put it on me. 501 00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:35,981 Oh, wow. I want to wear your lipstick. 502 00:18:36,015 --> 00:18:39,419 Well, that's interesting. I want to rip those earrings off 503 00:18:39,451 --> 00:18:42,087 and put 'em on and I want to be the girl! 504 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:44,191 That would be wonderful. 505 00:18:44,223 --> 00:18:48,461 But I won't do it around all these crazy Jews. 506 00:18:48,494 --> 00:18:50,462 And I don't care who's watching. I want what I want. 507 00:18:51,663 --> 00:18:52,699 (everyone gasping) Ooh! 508 00:18:58,371 --> 00:19:00,640 Unhand her, sir. Whoa, what is... Hey, man. 509 00:19:00,673 --> 00:19:02,442 That's my mother! 510 00:19:02,474 --> 00:19:03,509 Ooh! 511 00:19:03,542 --> 00:19:05,144 (everyone gasping) You okay? 512 00:19:05,178 --> 00:19:06,479 Nice shot, Dr. Nussbaum. 513 00:19:06,512 --> 00:19:08,280 Would you like to date my daughter? 514 00:19:08,315 --> 00:19:11,851 She's available. Oh, great, yeah, tell the whole room that I'm available. 515 00:19:11,884 --> 00:19:14,787 I'm not telling the whole room; I'm telling Dr. Nussbaum. 516 00:19:14,820 --> 00:19:17,088 A doctor. No, I got that. 517 00:19:18,657 --> 00:19:22,194 (deep sigh, groan) Oh, hey. 518 00:19:22,229 --> 00:19:25,565 Hey. I like your glasses. What happened to your eye? 519 00:19:25,597 --> 00:19:27,634 I got beat up at a bar mitzvah. (sighs) 520 00:19:27,666 --> 00:19:28,667 And I know that's embarrassing, and I know 521 00:19:28,701 --> 00:19:29,736 you're too embarrassed of me 522 00:19:29,769 --> 00:19:31,238 to introduce me to your sister. 523 00:19:31,270 --> 00:19:32,904 What? And I get that, Jess. 524 00:19:32,939 --> 00:19:35,842 Nick, that's not at all what... You know what? 525 00:19:35,875 --> 00:19:37,376 There is something I just cannot shake, 526 00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:39,177 I've been tossing and turning all night long. 527 00:19:39,211 --> 00:19:40,480 We literally have been apart 528 00:19:40,512 --> 00:19:41,847 for like 15 seconds, man, get out of here. 529 00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:43,215 I am your wingman now, Nick, 530 00:19:43,250 --> 00:19:44,083 because it-it takes two wings... 531 00:19:44,115 --> 00:19:45,183 Don't do this. 532 00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:47,153 ...for a, for a bird to dance. 533 00:19:47,185 --> 00:19:49,256 Jessica Day, you are dating a champion. 534 00:19:49,288 --> 00:19:52,491 I agree. And I don't know why on earth you would be embarrassed of him. 535 00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:54,160 Don't... I told him not... Excuse me? 536 00:19:54,192 --> 00:19:55,694 I don't understand where this is coming from. 537 00:19:55,728 --> 00:19:57,263 I am not embarrassed of Nick, 538 00:19:57,297 --> 00:19:58,530 not at all. For real? 539 00:19:58,565 --> 00:20:00,199 No. Well, that's great news. 540 00:20:00,232 --> 00:20:01,867 I'm glad that's out of the way. Fantastic. 541 00:20:01,901 --> 00:20:04,069 I'll see you guys for brunch. 542 00:20:04,103 --> 00:20:06,506 Why would you think that? 543 00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:10,009 She's embarrassed of me. Oh, hello. Oh, hey. 544 00:20:10,041 --> 00:20:11,042 This is, um... I'm Abby. 545 00:20:11,076 --> 00:20:13,011 Abby. Hi. 546 00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:16,182 Mom was right-- he does have an uptown butt. What? 547 00:20:16,214 --> 00:20:19,117 I'd like to put that butt in ski pants. What does that mean? 548 00:20:19,151 --> 00:20:20,519 Nothing. Everything. 549 00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:22,588 Come on, Abby. Oh, come on. 550 00:20:22,622 --> 00:20:24,089 Jess, I'm putting my stuff in your room. 551 00:20:24,123 --> 00:20:25,223 So that means you guys 552 00:20:25,258 --> 00:20:27,394 are gonna stay in your room. 553 00:20:27,426 --> 00:20:29,662 Thank me later. All right. 554 00:20:31,463 --> 00:20:34,701 Well, she is just a delight. (chuckles) 555 00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:37,436 So I might have told 556 00:20:37,470 --> 00:20:39,939 a few lies about my sister. 557 00:20:39,971 --> 00:20:42,074 She's a total train wreck and she was in jail. Well, look, why lie? 558 00:20:42,107 --> 00:20:44,544 You know how many Millers have been 559 00:20:44,576 --> 00:20:46,211 or are currently in jail? 560 00:20:46,244 --> 00:20:48,146 I get it. It's just, she's such a... 561 00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:49,848 ABBY (muffled): I can hear you. 562 00:20:51,284 --> 00:20:54,119 (whispers): Complicated person. Right. 563 00:20:54,153 --> 00:20:55,622 Anyway. 564 00:20:55,654 --> 00:20:56,955 She needs me. 565 00:20:56,989 --> 00:20:57,990 Right. 566 00:20:58,023 --> 00:20:59,291 Can she stay with us? 567 00:20:59,326 --> 00:21:00,992 Yeah, of course. How-how long? 568 00:21:01,027 --> 00:21:02,127 A few weeks. 569 00:21:02,161 --> 00:21:04,330 Few weeks. A month, tops. 570 00:21:04,364 --> 00:21:05,932 Six months, super tops. 571 00:21:05,964 --> 00:21:08,166 Six months. Just till I get on my feet. 572 00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:10,001 Oh. What's your address? 573 00:21:10,036 --> 00:21:12,270 In case I want to get any "deliveries." 574 00:21:12,305 --> 00:21:14,105 I'm not telling you. 575 00:21:14,140 --> 00:21:15,474 I'm not telling you, I'm n... 576 00:21:15,508 --> 00:21:17,676 "Deliveries"? No. 577 00:21:17,710 --> 00:21:19,979 Deliveries are fine, "deliveries," no. 578 00:21:20,011 --> 00:21:21,012 Depends what you want "delivered." 579 00:21:21,047 --> 00:21:23,048 I'll figure it out. 580 00:21:26,553 --> 00:21:27,787 Well... 581 00:21:30,623 --> 00:21:32,592 I love you. 582 00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:35,894 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org